I am an Au Pair, looking after an infant (and I have Au Paired for a few families with infants) and I would totally rematch, if you have walked on your Au Pair letting your baby chew on things he could chock on more than once I am surprised you still trust her to be left alone with him.

Would she even know what to do in case the baby did chock? I once had to do CPR on a baby who put something into her mouth in a park and turned blue, it was NOT fun at all and while thankfully the baby was okay I would never ever trust someone with a baby who needs to be told legos and coins batteries are a risk hazard (even if the baby did not chock on the battery, the content of the battery would completely damage his internal organs), this is NOT a personality issue, this is a lack of common sense and experience with babies that could result fatal for your newborn, and as an Au Pair the fact that she doesn't even seem to fake to know what she is doing when you are around make me shudder at the thought of what might happen when you are not around.

Protect your baby and rematch, it's gonna be hard for the Au Pair but she is NOT suited for babies and your priority should be ensuring your baby is safe.

OP, what you are describing is not a personality issue. Rather, your AP may not be infant qualified after all. Taking care of an infant and of older children is hard. It is not impossible to find an AP, who can do it. But those are rare and far in between. Not sure you’ll get anything better from the rematch pool. I know this is not why you want to hear, but if I were you, I would consider other childcare arrangements until your infant is older.

Have you rematched because AP is borderline acceptable or sucked it up for 6 more months?

I hate micromanaging. But AP seems to need it. For example, she has to be told that each small item is too small or dangerous for an infant to chew on rather than having some common sense. Pony beads, magnet toys, puzzle pieces, balloons, normal legos (not duplos), etc.

This is driving me nuts that I have to specify to this degree rather than be able to say “please don’t allow the baby to have small objects that can go completely into her mouth, things with magnets, and things with coin batteries.”

She does have responsibility over the older kid, so she is familiar with what an older kid’s toys are and also SHOULD be putting them away, but doesn’t always clean up, which provides an opportunity for the baby to crawl over and try to eat something.

Sadly, I don’t think it’s neglect, but that she’s not the brightest. She just doesn’t think about things and realize it’s bad until I notice and correct her. Fortunately, she is nice and takes the correction well.

If it is inexperience, then she outright lied or grossly exaggerated about her experience with my kids’ ages.

It’s so much mental work for me to have to continually watch, say things, or arrange scenarios where her inability is less of a problem. I’m tired and stressed out by having to manage her when I feel like I didn’t have to manage prior APs (when we didn’t have a baby in the house).

What would you do?