Anonymous wrote:Interesting, my AP just asked for a long weekend for a trip. She usually do split shift and it seems like initially she wanted the whole Friday off (she has no vacation day left) I asked her to do the morning shift before she travel but I was supprised she expected the whole day off. So I was wondering if she want the whole day off shouldn’t that be a vacation day? Btw I had to change my usual schedule to accommodate her request.

I would assume it’s a vacation day - maybe she does too?

Interesting, my AP just asked for a long weekend for a trip. She usually do split shift and it seems like initially she wanted the whole Friday off (she has no vacation day left) I asked her to do the morning shift before she travel but I was supprised she expected the whole day off. So I was wondering if she want the whole day off shouldn’t that be a vacation day? Btw I had to change my usual schedule to accommodate her request.

I accommodated, but not more than 1x per month. Usually because my parents were coming into town and could relieve the Au Pair early.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Ok, so sounds like maybe her friends have a bad batch of hosts or they just don't have job flexibility. We only had our very first AP ask for an extra day off once because she wanted to take a long weekend with a friend and although I had to take the day off I said yes. The rest of our APs have never asked but I would have said yes. Strange.

It is unusual that you’ve hosted multiple years, and only had one other request for a long weekend. All of my APs have requested long weekends a few times a year, and I had one particular AP who asked every month. It’s not strange to say no to particular long weekends.

We would have no problem doing this.

We do frequently BUT it is because my husband works from home on Fridays.

It should NOT be an expectation of Au Pairs. A few of my friends with Au Pairs never allow it because they work away from home 5 days per week.
For most people, it is not easy to just leave work early on a Friday for no reason.

Please do not lead your AP to believe it's no big deal and make other APs feel like they should expect the same.

Maybe your AP’s friends already committed to other long weekend trips with their other friends, and can’t/don’t want to visit Las Vegas with your AP?

I’ve regularly given long weekends, at least 1x but sometimes 3x per month. However, there are specific weekend where I can’t due to our work schedules, and it doesn’t make me a bad host.
Who cares why a Hf can’t accomodate the one long weekend your AP wants to head to Vegas? It happens, we all have different needs and schedules. My work schedule is different from yours, and I don’t have a bad boss.

It really depends. How good/reliable is the AP? How far in advance have they asked? How often have they asked for long weekends or other schedule accommodations?

Have you also considered these "friends" are not actually AP's friends and they're blowing her off too?

It could be that the families don’t have the same flexibility you do. That doesn’t make them bad host parents.

Or, maybe they’ve already given plenty of these days off and are saying no this time around. Who knows.

OP here. Ok, so sounds like maybe her friends have a bad batch of hosts or they just don't have job flexibility. We only had our very first AP ask for an extra day off once because she wanted to take a long weekend with a friend and although I had to take the day off I said yes. The rest of our APs have never asked but I would have said yes. Strange.

We also accommodate long weekends whenever possible and have done so multiple times each year for our 3 years of hosting.

We try to accommodate long weekends, when possible. At the same time, my job allows me to be flexible, so that I don't need to find replacement childcare.

I have no problem with this as long as it’s discussed in advance.

I'm just wondering for the other host families out there....how many of you will allow your AP to do an occasional "long weekend"? Our AP would like to go to Las Vegas for a weekend so wanted to take a Friday off after kids get on the bus which would just mean we'd need to be home a bit early from work on a Friday. She's struggling to find a friend whose host family will agree to this which I find astounding. How many of you would allow this (if it isn't a major problem to leave work at 2 on a Friday?) Obviously for families with kids at home full time this might be more difficult but with a great (or even a good) AP, we'd like to keep her happy and afford this small amount of flexibility!!