Anonymous wrote:OP. These are good points. Ugh, it's so frustrating because she does have the "it factor" and is the only nanny we've tried who does. This is so hard but I guess the search continues. DH and I do work for the government and while we don't have political aspirations, one just never knows. Not worth the risk.

A final idea to potentially make this work out... has anyone taken it upon themselves to pay the nanny's taxes themselves? Is that crazy?

You can't pay her taxes for her--that would count as income to her, on which she would owe...more taxes.

You can not withhold her portion of taxes, and just pay the employer share, in which case the failure to pay her taxes would be on her. But you would still need to send a W-2 to the IRS, so she'd be quite likely to get caught.

I might point out to her that your salaries, out of which you pay a nanny, are funded by taxes, so you don't agree that taxes are worthless or a waste of time. And she does benefit from the things that taxes pay for so long as she's living and working in this country. And as others have noted, not paying her on the books can cause all sorts of problems--you can't use a dependent care FSA, you might run into liability issues if she is injured or injures someone else while working for you, it can affect her immigration status, etc.

OP. These are good points. Ugh, it's so frustrating because she does have the "it factor" and is the only nanny we've tried who does. This is so hard but I guess the search continues. DH and I do work for the government and while we don't have political aspirations, one just never knows. Not worth the risk.

A final idea to potentially make this work out... has anyone taken it upon themselves to pay the nanny's taxes themselves? Is that crazy?

If she goes back and forth to her home country how are you
Going to cover the times she is gone anyway?

I think it's wrong. We all pay taxes to support all of the government activities that make the United States a place that your potential nanny wants to come to work in the first place, instead of staying in her home country to begin with.

However, I also think there's almost no chance you'll get caught, and unless you or your spouse has political ambitions, no one will investigate.

*not in this country legally

It would be a risk in some ways.

Meaning if you + your husband work for the government in any way, this could put your job in jeopardy some day.
Ditto if you or your husband plan on getting into politics someday.

And you can get in trouble later on if this Nanny happens to injure herself in your home & attempts to sue.
Or if things end on a bad note, and she tries to sue you for past wages, benefits, etc.

(The latter would be unlikely if she is here illegally however.)

If you pay her only in ca$h, then you will leave no paper trail and should be fine.

I know some Nannies in my playgroup who actually are not in this country & work off the books.
Their jobs are their only lifeline.

And if you find a stellar Nanny who happens to want payment under the table + is here illegally.....
Well I would try to work w/that then hire an American Citizen who I will be paying on the books, yet does not possess that “it” factor that great Nannies have.
(A Nanny either has it or she doesn’t.)

No amount of education or training can make a good Nanny.
She must have a special kind of chemistry that draws children to her naturally.

I was not personally willing to do it. We had to pass on one otherwise great nannyshare opportunity because it was under the table (and further complicated by the fact that the nanny was not legal to work in the U.S.!) It's a risk for both her and for you--and frankly not worth it in today's political climate.

There's also the broader issue that taxes are not just (or even mostly) for retirement--they support all of the social and physical infrastructure around us, which your nanny does use while she's living in the U.S., even if she has a home elsewhere. They also provide funding for things like Medicaid/Medicare, which she may need at some point even if she doesn't plan to.

I would just tell her that the offer is over the table, but that she is free to request that you not withhold income tax. (You aren't required to; only SS and Medicare are required.) You file your taxes, and beyond that it's on her to file her own. If she opts not to pay them because she doesn't believe in taxes--that's for her to figure out (although seems incredibly unwise right now...)

All the pp’s have a point. However, as a career nanny for over 30 years, I have never met any nanny or family who was paid under the table that for in trouble by the law. However, it is completely possible to get in trouble legally. When I first started nannying in the U.S I was an immigrant from Guatemala and would get paid cash. After I got my citizenship through my husband, I began requesting to be paid legally. As a nanny, I would never request to be paid under the table anymore, as I am legally able to work. Find another nanny, there’s one out there who is willing to be paid legally. If she plans to go back to her country to retire, she might as well work there and not here.

It is wrong, OP, not to mention dangerous for you with liability in case of an accident in your home.

You can find someone great and honest. Pass on this one.

I would not pay illegally. To me, this just means that her rate is higher than she thinks. Whatever rate she wants is what she expects to net. Would she be open to working legally if she netted the same amount she has in her past illegal work arrangements?

I would also worry about not being able to properly insure her (workers comp, car insurance) if you are not paying her legally. If she got in a car accident, would you pretend she wasn’t an employee? Yeah, no way.

Yes, it's illegal. And it's unfair to those of us who do pay taxes.

Wouldn’t do it, not worth the risk.

It's illegal.

Did you find anyone else whom you really liked as much as her? If not, then maybe suggest paying her half her salary on pay roll and the rest she can get cash? That’s how my mom has worked for many years, although my mom will retire here in the U.S. I can see where she sees paying taxes as “pointless,” and if she’s not willing to go on pay roll, maybe that’s a sign she’s not the one. You can also try contacting her past employers and ask about the situation. Was this not spoken about in the interview or in the ad?

We found an amazing nanny, did a trial run with her and the baby and we think she's the one. Small caveat. She thinks paying taxes is an absurd waste of hard-earned $$ and while I sympathize with the sentiment, i was (am?) fully expecting to pay taxes. Also, in case anyone asks, she's an older lady who has had a career in nannying and she comes highly recommended. I'm not sure what the situation was with other employers and taxes but she knows her job, clearly has been doing it for a long time, and is good at it.

Moms, how bad is it to not pay taxes? My nanny is an immigrant who travels back and forth to her home country. She won't even be here for retirement, she comes to earn money but her house and family are in her country. I know it's illegal but is it wrong? So bummed

What would you do?!