Anonymous wrote:Our nanny has been with us for eight years. Aside from needing her for the near constant school holidays and sick days, there is no way my kids could be involved in after school sports, play dates and lessons without her. Our nanny continues to do the kids laundry and their meal preparation. She became our house manager when the kids were little - handling all supply ordering, payment for housecleaning service, getting the handyman for repairs, keeping up with the payments and scheduling for the kids activities, grocery shopping for family staples (milk, juice, eggs, etc), taking care of our dog during the day.

I have friends with kids in aftercare who are always scrambling and running around at lunch or at night getting the special socks their kid needs tomorrow for gym class or the gallon of milk not to mention when their child wakes up with a fever at 6AM and they have important 8AM meetings that day.

Tell your DH to take over the default parent position and take off work for the dentist and wellness visits as well as the sick days, school holidays if he doesn't think your nanny is worth the cost.

We did something similar. So the nannies who refuse to lift a finger for anything not child-related can relax, we talked to our nanny first about the changes and found out what she wanted to do (including finding another family). She still has a guaranteed number of hours per pay period, but it's not the 100 (50/week) that she had before. I created a calendar that had all the kids' school holidays/closings/etc. on it so we could see what each pay period would look like. We had her take the kids to school and do the grocery shopping one day so she gets actually 11-12 hours on that day every week. We also added in other things like running errands during weeks when school would be open for all ten days of the pay period. She still does all their laundry (including washing and remaking their beds), she helps prepare our dinners, she babysits (we roll the hours into her normal pay, but it's care for after hours so I still call it babysitting), sometimes we add in some weekend time if we have something going on (she likes to do slumber parties at her house so we pay her for that whole time). We also gave her an hourly raise to help offset the slightly reduced hours. All told, she's probably make the same or even more than she did before. With the raise, her overtime is through the roof at 1.5 times regular pay, so we try to schedule some of that each pay period. I basically look at every two-week cycle and figure out where we can change the hours to make things work. It costs a lot, and way more than we ever expected, but we've found that it's so worth it. We're happy, she's happy, the kids are happy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to pay her for the full time and not request additional chores. Do you want your nanny to be rested when your child arrives home, or exhausted from a morning of shopping and cooking? You should keep her hours/salary as is and throw in a spa gift certificate so she can take care of herself while the child is in school.

This is hilarious. Because your nanny is working less get her a spa certificate??? Get out of here greedy nanny!!

That wasn't a nanny posting - that was the Forum Troll.

Anonymous wrote:You need to pay her for the full time and not request additional chores. Do you want your nanny to be rested when your child arrives home, or exhausted from a morning of shopping and cooking? You should keep her hours/salary as is and throw in a spa gift certificate so she can take care of herself while the child is in school.

This is hilarious. Because your nanny is working less get her a spa certificate??? Get out of here greedy nanny!!

Our nanny has been with us for eight years. Aside from needing her for the near constant school holidays and sick days, there is no way my kids could be involved in after school sports, play dates and lessons without her. Our nanny continues to do the kids laundry and their meal preparation. She became our house manager when the kids were little - handling all supply ordering, payment for housecleaning service, getting the handyman for repairs, keeping up with the payments and scheduling for the kids activities, grocery shopping for family staples (milk, juice, eggs, etc), taking care of our dog during the day.

I have friends with kids in aftercare who are always scrambling and running around at lunch or at night getting the special socks their kid needs tomorrow for gym class or the gallon of milk not to mention when their child wakes up with a fever at 6AM and they have important 8AM meetings that day.

Tell your DH to take over the default parent position and take off work for the dentist and wellness visits as well as the sick days, school holidays if he doesn't think your nanny is worth the cost.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Has your gone to school yet? Typically people start part time and only a couple days per week. That would be a huge transition otherwise.

Things that can be done: shopping (grocery or personal); taking the car in for maintenance or cleaning; washing family towels (personally I don’t like washing family sheets or clothing); washing child’s items (I assume she does this now, but she can do it when ds is at school; dry cleaning and other errands; cooking (this depends on her desire and skill level but with direction she should be able to handle some basic meals; preparing healthy snacks for after school; preparing lunch for the next day; preparing an activity for after school; doing some deep cleaning if child’s items; volunteering at school; helping plan and prep parties; etc.

Additionally, you will have holidays, sick days, and summer. Nannies can be very helpful when a child goes to school, just like a SAHP can be helpful to the household when a child goes to school.

No, he hasn’t started yet. We are just starting to look now. I don’t know that many people who have started only a couple days a week so it wasn’t on my radar but maybe that’s a good option.

I definitely see the value of a nanny for a school age kid. Thanks your examples were helpful.

Apart from the hours issue, you might want to consider whether you want your son to continue having lunch and nap at home, rather than on a mat in a classroom. Home is probably preferable, especially since you mention he has a good bond with the nanny. She can still do the tasks mentioned related to the child but there won't be as much down time that way in any event.

Anonymous wrote:Has your gone to school yet? Typically people start part time and only a couple days per week. That would be a huge transition otherwise.

Things that can be done: shopping (grocery or personal); taking the car in for maintenance or cleaning; washing family towels (personally I don’t like washing family sheets or clothing); washing child’s items (I assume she does this now, but she can do it when ds is at school; dry cleaning and other errands; cooking (this depends on her desire and skill level but with direction she should be able to handle some basic meals; preparing healthy snacks for after school; preparing lunch for the next day; preparing an activity for after school; doing some deep cleaning if child’s items; volunteering at school; helping plan and prep parties; etc.

Additionally, you will have holidays, sick days, and summer. Nannies can be very helpful when a child goes to school, just like a SAHP can be helpful to the household when a child goes to school.

No, he hasn’t started yet. We are just starting to look now. I don’t know that many people who have started only a couple days a week so it wasn’t on my radar but maybe that’s a good option.

I definitely see the value of a nanny for a school age kid. Thanks your examples were helpful.

You need to pay her for the full time and not request additional chores. Do you want your nanny to be rested when your child arrives home, or exhausted from a morning of shopping and cooking? You should keep her hours/salary as is and throw in a spa gift certificate so she can take care of herself while the child is in school.

Has your gone to school yet? Typically people start part time and only a couple days per week. That would be a huge transition otherwise.

Things that can be done: shopping (grocery or personal); taking the car in for maintenance or cleaning; washing family towels (personally I don’t like washing family sheets or clothing); washing child’s items (I assume she does this now, but she can do it when ds is at school; dry cleaning and other errands; cooking (this depends on her desire and skill level but with direction she should be able to handle some basic meals; preparing healthy snacks for after school; preparing lunch for the next day; preparing an activity for after school; doing some deep cleaning if child’s items; volunteering at school; helping plan and prep parties; etc.

Additionally, you will have holidays, sick days, and summer. Nannies can be very helpful when a child goes to school, just like a SAHP can be helpful to the household when a child goes to school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we are trying to figure out what would make sense to discuss with our nanny. She and ds are very bonded and she has told us often that she loves working for us. We are pretty relaxed and she has good pay (high $20s) and benefits. I would like to find a way to keep her on when kid starts preschool but DH won’t go for it unless there is some way to fill up at least some of the school time. I wouldn’t propose cleaning, but she likes cooking a lot so I thought I might ask her to cook for the family or do shopping/errands etc. The other option is to offer fewer hours (she is guaranteed 50 right now, but usually works less than that) and would go down to 40, so still full time but no overtime. I’m curious to hear what arrangements others have made that worked for them. If you are a nanny does this sound reasonable to you?

Will you still need 50 hours when ds is sick or school is closed? If so, don’t cut her guaranteed hours.

You can certainly ask if she’s willing to cook, shop and do errands, and she may be interested. However, most preschools are only 15 hours or less for 2-3 year olds, and you need to factor commute into that, so it’s really not that much time.

Yeah, if we do a a very minimal hours program I wouldn’t look to change anything but a lot of the programs we are looking at are “half days” that end around 2 pm, so it’s a big chunk of the day. Also she probably wouldn’t need to do drop off in the am, just picking up.

That is a good point about the guaranteed hours, thanks.

Honestly curious which programs end at 2, all the ones I know either end 12-1.30 or are daycares so end around 5.

I’m not in DC, not sure if it’s different. There are definitely programs that end earlier but some of the ones we like have a choice between full day that ends at 5 or half day ending at 2 (some maybe 1:30 - but after lunch/nap)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we are trying to figure out what would make sense to discuss with our nanny. She and ds are very bonded and she has told us often that she loves working for us. We are pretty relaxed and she has good pay (high $20s) and benefits. I would like to find a way to keep her on when kid starts preschool but DH won’t go for it unless there is some way to fill up at least some of the school time. I wouldn’t propose cleaning, but she likes cooking a lot so I thought I might ask her to cook for the family or do shopping/errands etc. The other option is to offer fewer hours (she is guaranteed 50 right now, but usually works less than that) and would go down to 40, so still full time but no overtime. I’m curious to hear what arrangements others have made that worked for them. If you are a nanny does this sound reasonable to you?

Will you still need 50 hours when ds is sick or school is closed? If so, don’t cut her guaranteed hours.

You can certainly ask if she’s willing to cook, shop and do errands, and she may be interested. However, most preschools are only 15 hours or less for 2-3 year olds, and you need to factor commute into that, so it’s really not that much time.

Yeah, if we do a a very minimal hours program I wouldn’t look to change anything but a lot of the programs we are looking at are “half days” that end around 2 pm, so it’s a big chunk of the day. Also she probably wouldn’t need to do drop off in the am, just picking up.

That is a good point about the guaranteed hours, thanks.

Honestly curious which programs end at 2, all the ones I know either end 12-1.30 or are daycares so end around 5.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:we are trying to figure out what would make sense to discuss with our nanny. She and ds are very bonded and she has told us often that she loves working for us. We are pretty relaxed and she has good pay (high $20s) and benefits. I would like to find a way to keep her on when kid starts preschool but DH won’t go for it unless there is some way to fill up at least some of the school time. I wouldn’t propose cleaning, but she likes cooking a lot so I thought I might ask her to cook for the family or do shopping/errands etc. The other option is to offer fewer hours (she is guaranteed 50 right now, but usually works less than that) and would go down to 40, so still full time but no overtime. I’m curious to hear what arrangements others have made that worked for them. If you are a nanny does this sound reasonable to you?

Will you still need 50 hours when ds is sick or school is closed? If so, don’t cut her guaranteed hours.

You can certainly ask if she’s willing to cook, shop and do errands, and she may be interested. However, most preschools are only 15 hours or less for 2-3 year olds, and you need to factor commute into that, so it’s really not that much time.

Yeah, if we do a a very minimal hours program I wouldn’t look to change anything but a lot of the programs we are looking at are “half days” that end around 2 pm, so it’s a big chunk of the day. Also she probably wouldn’t need to do drop off in the am, just picking up.

That is a good point about the guaranteed hours, thanks.

Anonymous wrote:we are trying to figure out what would make sense to discuss with our nanny. She and ds are very bonded and she has told us often that she loves working for us. We are pretty relaxed and she has good pay (high $20s) and benefits. I would like to find a way to keep her on when kid starts preschool but DH won’t go for it unless there is some way to fill up at least some of the school time. I wouldn’t propose cleaning, but she likes cooking a lot so I thought I might ask her to cook for the family or do shopping/errands etc. The other option is to offer fewer hours (she is guaranteed 50 right now, but usually works less than that) and would go down to 40, so still full time but no overtime. I’m curious to hear what arrangements others have made that worked for them. If you are a nanny does this sound reasonable to you?

Will you still need 50 hours when ds is sick or school is closed? If so, don’t cut her guaranteed hours.

You can certainly ask if she’s willing to cook, shop and do errands, and she may be interested. However, most preschools are only 15 hours or less for 2-3 year olds, and you need to factor commute into that, so it’s really not that much time.

I think that explaining that you'd love to keep her, but you'd like her to start doing meal prep and grocery shopping and other errands while your son is in school. Keep the expectations reasonable and see what she says.

we are trying to figure out what would make sense to discuss with our nanny. She and ds are very bonded and she has told us often that she loves working for us. We are pretty relaxed and she has good pay (high $20s) and benefits. I would like to find a way to keep her on when kid starts preschool but DH won’t go for it unless there is some way to fill up at least some of the school time. I wouldn’t propose cleaning, but she likes cooking a lot so I thought I might ask her to cook for the family or do shopping/errands etc. The other option is to offer fewer hours (she is guaranteed 50 right now, but usually works less than that) and would go down to 40, so still full time but no overtime. I’m curious to hear what arrangements others have made that worked for them. If you are a nanny does this sound reasonable to you?