Dear OP - Au pairs can be amazing and helpful, but they are not cheap labor. Read the State Department rules carefully, as they apply to all au pairs regardless of the agency you use. No one is going tell you that they know of a particular agency that is lax with enforcing the rules, if that's what you're hoping for.

THAT SAID - Agencies have subtle differences, but I've found that what matters most is the person you invite and bring into your family. I've always sought my au pairs through 2-3 agencies simultaneously, and then gone with the au pair that we want, not the agency.

I do the main food shopping, but my AP will run out and grab milk, OJ, etc...if we need something. If you have an AP with any common sense, she will do this as a member of your family.

Of course, as do most APs. However, the OP seems to think that the main grocery shopping can fly. APs are not a less expensive version of a professional nanny who is going to care for the infant and while the infant naps, do the household laundry, clean up, start dinner, and when the baby wakes up, do the household grocery shopping. And too many HF enter the program with a false understanding of what APs can do.

I do the main food shopping, but my AP will run out and grab milk, OJ, etc...if we need something. If you have an AP with any common sense, she will do this as a member of your family.

Register at multiple.
Meet the LCCs
Search for the AP
Select the agency she is with.

Simple as that.

You can do a search on this board. 'Which agency' is probably the single most asked question on this forum.

Agreed with others. Chores accepted are limited to what is specifically for the children: laundry, cooking/feeding, minimal cleaning of kids' room/bath. Food shopping only if it's related to the kids meals.

You *can* find a responsible, excellent au pair, but only 10% of the success has to do with the agency. The rest is all about your ability to screen/select the right person, and some of it is luck. Also remember that you have to do this year after year, so statistically, you won't find a responsible, excellent person every year (a language requirement makes it more challenging. It's feasible, we have done it, but challenging). You may want to adjust your expectations going into this process.

Groceries for kids, not the family shopping. And you won’t want your AP doing your main grocery shopping anyway. It takes a long time to become familiar with brands, sales, seasonal produce, etc.

APs become resentful very quickly when their role starts leaning more towards the house than the kids. I only use 25 hours a week so I could technically have AP clean out kids closets, basement rec area, kids area in the garage, etc but I don’t because I know it would turn our relationship sideways.

Register with multiple and meet the LCC for that agency. They will be your primary interaction with that agency. I have had several agencies and will not return to APIA because of their LCC, and their policies.

OP here—my understanding is they can help with kid clean up like dishes, laundry, and may do grocery shopping too. That’s what the reference to house help was referring to.

It does not sound like AP program is a good fit from what you describe. It sounds like you need a nanny and housekeeper or nanny who is also willing to clean. APs are definitely not that person.

We live in DC and are looking for advice on selecting an au pair agency. Which do you recommend and why? Any to avoid? Our first priority is to get someone who is responsible, an excellent caregiver, and also willing to help with as much house stuff as is permitted in these arrangements. If you’ve had good experience with someone caring for an infant, that is of particular interest too (get the sense people hire au pairs more for older children but may be mistaken about that). And we prefer a match with China but that’s not critical. Thank you!