Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe that people on this forum are condoning the cruel words expressed by this MomBoss.

These words are demeaning to a child & may have long-term negative effects later on.

Perhaps this Mother can hire a respite Nanny/Babysitter to allow her some "me" time which every parent needs every now + then.

She did. It's the OP.

I cannot believe that people on this forum are condoning the cruel words expressed by this MomBoss.

These words are demeaning to a child & may have long-term negative effects later on.

Perhaps this Mother can hire a respite Nanny/Babysitter to allow her some "me" time which every parent needs every now + then.

The difference, angry nannies, is that the MB has a child with special needs. That's a whole other ball of wax. If you have been privileged to live your life without children so far or without children with special needs, you simply cannot understand. If you want some perspective, head over to the special needs boards and just read for a few hours. Until you have walked a mile in their shoes, park the judgement somewhere else.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

There are people that shouldn't be parents. The op doesn't have to quit or be empathetic towards her mb as you suggested, she just wanted to vent about her careless mb.

From the sounds of it her mb isn't very maternal and just looks for reasons to not be doing something of quality with her own kids. Op has a right to make that observation and vent about it.

No one really gets what it's like to be a parent until they become one. And you have even less idea what it would be like to have a special needs child, particularly if you have one with substantial needs. Now that I have kids, I m very, very thankful that we have the money to make sure that even if one of my kids suddenly needed significant care, I wouldn't have to do it ll the time, because I have learned that I am not a patient person. Before we had kids, I would have told you I was great in a crisis and very go-with-the-flow. I had no idea how relentless parenting is.

This mom needs counseling.

It is so condescending for mbs to run into threads where nannies are expressing themselves to hurry and call them names and judge them. Its laughable that mbs like to try and convince the women that are actually raising their kids during their WAKE hours before dinner bath and bed (and a lot of nannies do that part too) that they have no idea what its like to be a parent. Especially to the kids they nanny for. Just like compassion is being called for this mother in the OP compassion can be used for this nanny that has to deal with it also

+ a million. The hypocrisy is unreal. OP you're entitled to feel however you want to feel about your MB so long as you keep doing your job. My MB is a total bitch too. Not to her kid but to me. She talks to me constantly about personal things that I don't care about, but then nickels and dimes me to save herself a buck. People complain about their employers. Get over it MBs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

There are people that shouldn't be parents. The op doesn't have to quit or be empathetic towards her mb as you suggested, she just wanted to vent about her careless mb.

From the sounds of it her mb isn't very maternal and just looks for reasons to not be doing something of quality with her own kids. Op has a right to make that observation and vent about it.

No one really gets what it's like to be a parent until they become one. And you have even less idea what it would be like to have a special needs child, particularly if you have one with substantial needs. Now that I have kids, I m very, very thankful that we have the money to make sure that even if one of my kids suddenly needed significant care, I wouldn't have to do it ll the time, because I have learned that I am not a patient person. Before we had kids, I would have told you I was great in a crisis and very go-with-the-flow. I had no idea how relentless parenting is.

This mom needs counseling.

It is so condescending for mbs to run into threads where nannies are expressing themselves to hurry and call them names and judge them. Its laughable that mbs like to try and convince the women that are actually raising their kids during their WAKE hours before dinner bath and bed (and a lot of nannies do that part too) that they have no idea what its like to be a parent. Especially to the kids they nanny for. Just like compassion is being called for this mother in the OP compassion can be used for this nanny that has to deal with it also

I love my kid but really, being a mom sucks.

She doesn't enjoy being a Mom. She can afford to hire a mom to replace her. You got that job. Get over it. You have no idea what it is like to be a SN mom. You go home at night.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to leave the job OP.

Your judgments of your employer are highly unprofessional.

I'm not going to judge a mother of a child with special needs based on the word of a disgruntled, unprofessional nanny.

OP here, I am very professional, but if I feel the meet isn't treating the special needs child or any child for that matter unfairly. I will speak up! You can call me unprofessional if you want but that's your opinion. Other than how she treats her children at times, I have no other issues. But hey who am I to know anything. I'm unprofessional

I think your tone and attitude are quite unprofessional. The mom may not be what I would expect or hope, or she may be drowning in the realities of her daily life, but you write with extreme judgment, scorn, and condescension about your employer.

When you have so little respect for your employer the professional thing is to find another job, while being circumspect in your behavior for however long you're cashing your current employer's checks.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

There are people that shouldn't be parents. The op doesn't have to quit or be empathetic towards her mb as you suggested, she just wanted to vent about her careless mb.

From the sounds of it her mb isn't very maternal and just looks for reasons to not be doing something of quality with her own kids. Op has a right to make that observation and vent about it.

No one really gets what it's like to be a parent until they become one. And you have even less idea what it would be like to have a special needs child, particularly if you have one with substantial needs. Now that I have kids, I m very, very thankful that we have the money to make sure that even if one of my kids suddenly needed significant care, I wouldn't have to do it ll the time, because I have learned that I am not a patient person. Before we had kids, I would have told you I was great in a crisis and very go-with-the-flow. I had no idea how relentless parenting is.

This mom needs counseling.

Anonymous wrote:You need to leave the job OP.

Your judgments of your employer are highly unprofessional.

I'm not going to judge a mother of a child with special needs based on the word of a disgruntled, unprofessional nanny.

OP here, I am very professional, but if I feel the meet isn't treating the special needs child or any child for that matter unfairly. I will speak up! You can call me unprofessional if you want but that's your opinion. Other than how she treats her children at times, I have no other issues. But hey who am I to know anything. I'm unprofessional

You need to leave the job OP.

Your judgments of your employer are highly unprofessional.

I'm not going to judge a mother of a child with special needs based on the word of a disgruntled, unprofessional nanny.

Anonymous wrote:You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

There are people that shouldn't be parents. The op doesn't have to quit or be empathetic towards her mb as you suggested, she just wanted to vent about her careless mb.

From the sounds of it her mb isn't very maternal and just looks for reasons to not be doing something of quality with her own kids. Op has a right to make that observation and vent about it.

Anonymous wrote:You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

OP here, here's the thing, she is a SAHM who never stays at home. She's always out doing some type of errand or just leaving to be leaving, I come in early and sometimes stays late to help with this child and the others, but I also have my own life that I put on hold to give her a break, even though I feel like she should stay at home and spend time with her kids (in my opinion) I know it can be overwhelming because even as the nanny, it's overwhelming for me. I just feel like she shouldn't exclude the child from everything like now, she and the other kids are out celebrating his siblings birthday and the child is here with me because she "didn't want to deal with him today."

You're right- that is a horrible thing for mom to say to her kids. HOWEVER, living everyday with an Autistic child (or any disabled child) is very overwhelming and a total life changer. And some people just aren't as naturally patient as others, as much as they try (myself included).

So, either quit, or try to be empathetic and (if you are willing) see if she wants you to work extra, maybe a weeknight or weekend (for extra money of course) to give her more of a break that she's begging for.

Being a working parent of multiple children or a disabled child is very, very stressful and leaves you 0 time to unwind and recharge.
As my good friend just said- I feel like I just work to pay the mortgage and for everyone else to live a life, but none for me.

My MB is a real bitch (sorry but it had to be said) she has the most amazing children, very smart and sweet, but of course they have their moments of disrespect and typical children behavior. But I've seen mom go too far with them, she yelled at one of the children and told them, "sometimes I wish I wasn't a mom! I never wanted kids in the first place." I was so upset for the kids that it pissed me off very badly, she even confided in me one day and said how she was jealous of other parents because one of her kids has Autism and she can't do everything a "normal parent" does because she has to take care of that child, and she want to be able to go out and explore the world without worrying about children. I am very disgusted with her and began looking for a much kinder and caring NF, because MB is absolutely pathetic and I refuse to work for someone who acts that way towards her own flesh and blood when they push her buttons.