Anonymous wrote:Sorry to bring up an old thread but we found a candidate we like, but also makes some decent money as an instagram "influencer". She is a legit fitness model - and said she cannot make her account private because it would reduce her hits.

Has anyone come across this? I do not want to deal with stalkers or creepy people if we were to match with her and have her in our home.

Thanks!

I’d ask her for specific things she does to make sure people don’t know where she is, eg monitoring what’s in the background of her photos, what she says about her location, etc.

Other than that tho it might be a very cool experience for your kids. We matched with a former semi pro athlete, and it’s been awesome for our athlete kids.

Sorry to bring up an old thread but we found a candidate we like, but also makes some decent money as an instagram "influencer". She is a legit fitness model - and said she cannot make her account private because it would reduce her hits.

Has anyone come across this? I do not want to deal with stalkers or creepy people if we were to match with her and have her in our home.

Thanks!

We select only fit APs. If they are hot great, if not great too. We just need them to fit in the backseat sometimes with two car seats in.
My DH is fun and still attractive; but also twice these girls age and no matter what little fantasy some men may have about the program I am 100% sure that none of the girls were remotely interested in my DH.
Now, older nephews and teenagers in the neighborhood - they definitely showed an interest in a couple of the more attractive ones we had. This was an asset at times because our kids got more attention at the pool, park, etc. so it probably is a net positive to have a a more attractive AP of same talent/skill of a non attractive one.

Anonymous wrote:I have told candidates to dress more appropriately. /hostdad

There is a huge difference between being attractive and dressing appropriately. I have seen (far too many) fat people dress inappropriately - too short skirts with buttocks showing, pantyhose stretched so tight it didn't cover anything, too small bras, boobs falling out of shirt, muffin top neither covered by pants nor top. And even being nicely dressed can be inappropriate - you don't wear what you would wear for your job at a bank when working with young children because pencil skirt, pantyhose and high heels are simply not the most appropriate dress for getting down on the floor or baking sand cakes all morning. Don't even get me started on crop tops and ripped jeans no matter your size or age. One of my coworkes dresses so inappropriately that it hurts but as we don't have a dress code a 40 year old gets away with ripped pantyhose and too long tshirts (no, not short dresses, real tshirts, barely covering her behind), fortunately for her she is so disgustingly attractive (as in tall, slight build, thin, boobs, pretty face) and is so competent that the customers she has contact with don't mind. And because it doesn't affect her figures (and if it does only positively) our boss can't (or doesn't want to) say anything.

Being attractive / pretty doesn't mean (and shouldn't imply) unprofessional or inadequate dress.
I'd pass over a candidate for inappropriate pictures but not for being pretty. And yes, the agencies do recommend to go for "modest" clothes in pictures and in the video. On the other hand, many candidates are smart enough to realize that HF are looking for somebody to play with their children, (at least pretend to) be willing to get dirty, to be active and mature and not for a pretty princes who is scared to break a nail.

Anonymous wrote:I was actually surprised how many au pairs have sexy bare-shoulders pictures. And I always chuckle when I see those sit there for weeks, while others get matched with HFs.

Bare-shoulder pictures are considered "sexy?" What?

My Au Pairs tend to be quite attractive, but they dressed conservatively. It's important to make a distinction between things people can help (how they dress) and things they can't help (how they looked). Also, be a realist. Giselle doesn't want your husband...but a Lena Dunham type might. I'll go with a super hot AP all day every day in part because I know (as someone who was super hot at that age) that they receive so much attention from young men that they won't even notice their host dad.

My two best APs were/are (one is my current) drop dead gorgeous. Beautiful faces and figures. They were also beautiful on the inside and incredibly mature (both just out of high school). They were both naturally pretty and they were not overly made-up in their profiles (or in real life). Both presented in their profiles as gorgeous and sporty - it didn't seem like they were trying to "be" more or less pretty than they were. Neither had any interest in dating American guys (and were generally not boy crazy at all). Their attractiveness presented no issues whatsoever.

I am not sure I'd use attractiveness as a way to weed people in or out, and I wouldn't want an AP who felt compelled to either hide or play up her attractiveness in order to match - i want girls who are comfortable with who they are 100 percent and present themselves accordingly during matching. If a candidate's profile shows her as overly made up, with no "natural" pix, and dressed inappropriately, I'd probably not even click on them. My 11 y o. DD needs a good role model - and both of my gorgeous APs who presented themselves in their profiles as exactly who they were, and who were clearly comfortable in their own skin, turned out to be PERFECT role models.

I have told candidates to dress more appropriately. /hostdad

They do. I am pretty sure our third AP actually put makeup on to look less attractive for skype. Maybe she had a friend in movies doing it, because when she arrived we learned she was an aspiring sports reporter. About 5'10" 23 year old Brazilian beauty queen. She looked cute on skype but always had hair up and we assumed she did not have a very good complexion. Now I think it was intentional.
I literally saw her get off the bus and thought "that is a brave woman who is letting her in the house". Then she kept walking towards us with a big smile and we all were confused as none of us recognized her and thought she had the wrong family.

She was a sweet girl and a fine AP, lots of teasing in the neighborhood at first from my husbands friends and mine.
I am sure the men enjoyed looking at her for that year. We never discussed anything too personal, but no stalkers showing up that we ever knew of.

Anonymous wrote:

And there may be partying and boyfriend issues.

I had partying and boyfriend issues when I was a fat and average-looking teen/young adult.

Yes, I think some candidates do "dress down" because they don't want to appear princessy, or want to appear more wholesome.

I think a lot of beautiful young women do downplay being attractive in fear of being called vain
Jealousy runs rampant and it is not fun being on the receiving end of that

I was actually surprised how many au pairs have sexy bare-shoulders pictures. And I always chuckle when I see those sit there for weeks, while others get matched with HFs.

Yes. Many do. But some also post their glamour half naked shots in their applications. Weird.
Since we are being honest here, I would not pick a really attractive candidate either. Not that I think my husband would do anything. But because I don't need to see it first thing in the morning while I am runnin around haggard and am overweight.

And there may be partying and boyfriend issues.

I am new to this and just started to skype candidates. I have been surprised that the girls are more attractive then the photos they post in their profile or how they look in their videos.
Not that I am choosing anyone on looks; but not sure I want Giselle living with me either.
Are the candidates told to downplay their appearance by the angencies or something? It is not going to impact my selection, unless it really was a Giselle clone; then I probably would pass.