Anonymous wrote:Nanny just started on January 3. She's already taken two sick days in the past three weeks, which happen to have been MLK Day earlier this week and inauguration day today. As outlined in her contract we only gave her the major holidays off. Of course her calling in sick the morning of both of these days makes me a bit suspicious if she just wants to stay at home with her own daughter since she knows that my husband and I are off and can take care of our son. I guess it shouldn't matter because we're deducting it from her sick days and she'll have to start using unpaid sick leave whenever she runs out of her paid sick days and it's only January, but it's making me have some trust issues/negative feelings about her, which sucks because everything else is going great.

Would this be a red flag to you? I guess we'll see what she does on President's Day.

This is what most families do. Many people work those days - office jobs, health provider jobs, accountants' busy period, etc.
She should not be doing the early morning sick day BS, she needs to use her vacation days for this and give notice. Or, get care for her K-12 yo kids and show up at her job.
What she should not do is make you scramble around at 8am instead of showing up. Poor form.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mlk is a federal holiday

so what. lots of companies and organization work on all the minor federal holidays or generous school holidays.

national holidays are July 4th, Xmas day, Memorial Day and Labor Day.

I don't even know what the silly federal holidays are since the last 5 companies I've worked for over 18 years have not had those off. Growing up in Chicago I didn't have those off from public school either. Must be a liberal east coast teacher's union thing, plus all those professional days off.

can't imagine if my nanny disrespected my schedule and didn't show up, got caught and then turned around an pretended to be sick. Unprofessional.

To be fair OP and husband have the day off. They choose to be lazy ass parents and not want to deal wth their kid. I wouldn't be surprised if there's other issues going on and nanny is already looking for another position.

Anonymous wrote:Mlk is a federal holiday

so what. lots of companies and organization work on all the minor federal holidays or generous school holidays.

national holidays are July 4th, Xmas day, Memorial Day and Labor Day.

I don't even know what the silly federal holidays are since the last 5 companies I've worked for over 18 years have not had those off. Growing up in Chicago I didn't have those off from public school either. Must be a liberal east coast teacher's union thing, plus all those professional days off.

can't imagine if my nanny disrespected my schedule and didn't show up, got caught and then turned around an pretended to be sick. Unprofessional.

Anonymous wrote:Nanny just started on January 3. She's already taken two sick days in the past three weeks, which happen to have been MLK Day earlier this week and inauguration day today. As outlined in her contract we only gave her the major holidays off. Of course her calling in sick the morning of both of these days makes me a bit suspicious if she just wants to stay at home with her own daughter since she knows that my husband and I are off and can take care of our son. I guess it shouldn't matter because we're deducting it from her sick days and she'll have to start using unpaid sick leave whenever she runs out of her paid sick days and it's only January, but it's making me have some trust issues/negative feelings about her, which sucks because everything else is going great.

Would this be a red flag to you? I guess we'll see what she does on President's Day.

That is awful. Yes, red flag, two strikes and one to go. Part of being a nanny is RELIABLE CHILDCARE.

This is a communication problem on her part - telling your boss at the last minute (i.e. when you are supposed to show up) that you are "sick" is poor form, disrespectful and disruptive.
If she feels strongly about taking federal or school days off, off she has to notify you weeks in advance so you can get backup. Not uses a sick day. And if she has no sick days and needs to be home, it will have to be unpaid.

Tell her you are disappointed and refer her to her contract of Holidays off. And reiterate that sick days are for being sick, not deciding to stay home. Regardless of what you or your husband do with your time - have to be in office, work from home, are taking a sick day yourself or have off. Then say you expect this not to continue happening and let's move on for next week.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:YES! It is a red flag!! I am a nanny and I am shocked by this! It is January 20th and she started on January 3rd?! Two separate sick days out of 14 or 15 working days?!!!

Start looking for her replacement NOW.

This is the bigger issue. Is it possible that she just hasn't figured out alternative care for her daughter yet? It's possible she didn't expect to be employed so quickly. Not your problem, but maybe won't be a problem going forward.

FWIW, I offered to let my nanny with school-aged children bring them on occasion if necessary. It happened less than a handful of times over 2 years, and the kids enjoyed each other.

Yes, we told her it was OK to bring her daughter when she first started. And her husband works early (like 5-1) so even if she wanted to take a half day we'd be OK with that too. The inconvenience is one thing that we can deal with (for example, I had specifically made a dentist appointment today for the same time my husband had made a haircut appointment thinking we'd have childcare; annoying, but not the end of the world because he just shifted his appointment to later). But more importantly, it's making me doubt her honesty, which is never a good feeling. Kind of hoping I was just over-reacting.

This would be an issue for me, too. She took the job understanding the hours, and now she doesn't like them. That's a problem. No one likes to work holidays/weekends/off hours, but almost all of do, at least in some jobs at some points in our lives. You get to decide when you accept the job if those are deal-breakers. If not, and you take the job, complain to your significant other and show up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:YES! It is a red flag!! I am a nanny and I am shocked by this! It is January 20th and she started on January 3rd?! Two separate sick days out of 14 or 15 working days?!!!

Start looking for her replacement NOW.

This is the bigger issue. Is it possible that she just hasn't figured out alternative care for her daughter yet? It's possible she didn't expect to be employed so quickly. Not your problem, but maybe won't be a problem going forward.

FWIW, I offered to let my nanny with school-aged children bring them on occasion if necessary. It happened less than a handful of times over 2 years, and the kids enjoyed each other.

Yes, we told her it was OK to bring her daughter when she first started. And her husband works early (like 5-1) so even if she wanted to take a half day we'd be OK with that too. The inconvenience is one thing that we can deal with (for example, I had specifically made a dentist appointment today for the same time my husband had made a haircut appointment thinking we'd have childcare; annoying, but not the end of the world because he just shifted his appointment to later). But more importantly, it's making me doubt her honesty, which is never a good feeling. Kind of hoping I was just over-reacting.

Can you allow her to bring her kid on days the kids are out of school for non major holidays (not talking about breaks and summer vacation)? That might eliminate the calling in. She wants to spend time with her kid just like you presumably want to spend time with yours. Also she may not have child care for those occasional days, who knows. One other thing to keep in mind is the job tends to be harder when the parents are home, either because the kids behave differently or because the nanny feels "watched" or nit picked all day. Something to keep in mind for why she's calling in.

Anonymous wrote:YES! It is a red flag!! I am a nanny and I am shocked by this! It is January 20th and she started on January 3rd?! Two separate sick days out of 14 or 15 working days?!!!

Start looking for her replacement NOW.

This is the bigger issue. Is it possible that she just hasn't figured out alternative care for her daughter yet? It's possible she didn't expect to be employed so quickly. Not your problem, but maybe won't be a problem going forward.

FWIW, I offered to let my nanny with school-aged children bring them on occasion if necessary. It happened less than a handful of times over 2 years, and the kids enjoyed each other.

Mlk is a federal holiday

Its a red flag however, if you know she has her own kid that is out of school because of the holiday and you and DH are both at home, then you should have given it as a day off...

YES! It is a red flag!! I am a nanny and I am shocked by this! It is January 20th and she started on January 3rd?! Two separate sick days out of 14 or 15 working days?!!!

Start looking for her replacement NOW.

OP here. I guess I'll have to wait for the criticism to begin. I had done a search in the forums when we were drafting up the contract and it seemed like it was common for families to only give the six major holidays (New Year's, Memorial Day, July 4th, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas) so that's what we did. We also do day after Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve day off too. I don't work for the federal government so I don't get all the federal holidays off anyway, but I did get these two days off this week.

They are her days off and she can take them whenever she chooses.

Yes, red flag. No, I wouldn't say anything yet. Wait and see.

I might tell her that it would be much better for both of you if she wants to take those days off that she ask for them in advance and use her regular PTO (if she has any yet). Remind her that she has limited sick days.

Just a head's up: You're going to get slammed here for not giving her the days off that you also have off, but I don't give all of the minor holidays, either.

This is similar to all of the posts about requests for unpaid time off, though. If she calls out a lot, she may not work out for you long term.

Nanny just started on January 3. She's already taken two sick days in the past three weeks, which happen to have been MLK Day earlier this week and inauguration day today. As outlined in her contract we only gave her the major holidays off. Of course her calling in sick the morning of both of these days makes me a bit suspicious if she just wants to stay at home with her own daughter since she knows that my husband and I are off and can take care of our son. I guess it shouldn't matter because we're deducting it from her sick days and she'll have to start using unpaid sick leave whenever she runs out of her paid sick days and it's only January, but it's making me have some trust issues/negative feelings about her, which sucks because everything else is going great.

Would this be a red flag to you? I guess we'll see what she does on President's Day.