You were generous to allow her to use vacation time and PTO for a trip she failed to disclose when she was hired. You were generous to allow her to take your kids to her doctor appointments rather than making her take unpaid leave. Now that your nanny has reaped the benefits of your generosity, she is throwing a tantrum because she is no longer getting her way. Time to move on.

Next time, hire someone who you can clearly communicate with (as you noted that communication is an issue) and make the leave accrue (as many jobs do - x hours per week, for a total of y per year).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you hired a non-native English speaker and didn't realize that she'd probably need to take at least 1 long trip each year? Then your kids get her sick and you dock her pay?

Are you under some impression that every non-native speaker travels abroad yearly?

The odds are that someone who's native tongue is not English will probably be traveling abroad far more than an American nanny. Think about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you hired a non-native English speaker and didn't realize that she'd probably need to take at least 1 long trip each year? Then your kids get her sick and you dock her pay?

Are you under some impression that every non-native speaker travels abroad yearly?

LOL.

I also agree with PP that it doesn't matter where she got the virus from, you don't want to get into a debate over this every time she gets sick! I think your mistake was in being over-generous by allowing her to use ALL of her PTO towards a vacation before the year was up, i.e., before it was accrued and not leave any for actual sicknesses. And I also think it's really sh*tty of the nanny to complain that you don't pay her enough. I would NOT keep on a nanny who felt that way; an employee who feels they are underpaid will act out and you probably won't even know about it. It also is very unprofessional behavior and she is probably unprofessional in other ways, too.

Anonymous wrote:So you hired a non-native English speaker and didn't realize that she'd probably need to take at least 1 long trip each year? Then your kids get her sick and you dock her pay?

Are you under some impression that every non-native speaker travels abroad yearly?

Anonymous wrote:So you hired a non-native English speaker and didn't realize that she'd probably need to take at least 1 long trip each year? Then your kids get her sick and you dock her pay?

No. She hired someone who didn't disclose previously planned extended vacation. But the employer allowed that. Then the employee got sick repeatedly and now has no leave - of any kind - left to cover it. The employer is offering a way to let the employee make up hours so she doesn't lose income, but the employee is complaining that she is underpaid - in a job she accepted only 8 months ago.

This OP is not in the wrong, except perhaps only in not realizing that this nanny wasn't the best option and deciding not to hire her.

So you hired a non-native English speaker and didn't realize that she'd probably need to take at least 1 long trip each year? Then your kids get her sick and you dock her pay?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's kind of shitty to dock her hours when she caught an illness from your children.

This is a valid point, OP. Please respond.

Not OP, but I don't think this matters at all. Viruses are everywhere. People who work with kids get colds and viruses more frequently, that's the nature of the job whether you are a nanny, pediatrician, school teacher, etc. As long as you provide reasonable sick time, no one should be playing forensic biologist about whose "fault" the cold was. If the nanny, to make up a different example, injures herself while exercising, you don't change your policy to not give her PTO because the absence is "her fault."

Just have a fair and generous sick leave policy. And next time don't let it be used up without contingency plans!

Anonymous wrote:It's kind of shitty to dock her hours when she caught an illness from your children.

Normally I would agree, however the nanny chose to use time that was intended for sick leave (PTO) to take an out of country vacation that she didn't even clear with her employers before planning.

Had she used all her sick leave on being sick, and then the kids made her sick, I would absolutely agree.

Anonymous wrote:It's kind of shitty to dock her hours when she caught an illness from your children.

This is a valid point, OP. Please respond.

It's kind of shitty to dock her hours when she caught an illness from your children.

OP here. Thanks for these thoughts. We've already taken our vacation week as well, otherwise I would certainly offer her that option!

I agree w/ 19:22 - I'd let her use a vacation day.

And I agree with 19:24 that she should have disclosed the trip.

You are paying a reasonable market rate and your benefits package is quite standard. She accepted the job under those terms and has been there less than a year. Her attitude would be a serious concern for me.

I don't think you're in the wrong at all. I also don't think this bodes well, unfortunately.

She should have told you about that already planned trip before she signed on with you, so I'm not feeling very sympathetic towards her. I don't know... you run the risk of her leaving, so you really need to follow your gut on this one.

I think your proposal is a fair alternative to unpaid time off and she is being inappropriate complaining about it. That being said, you could also offer to deduct from her remaining vacation week. If you are already planning the vacation, you could arrange that she will work at least one full day you are gone on a larger scale, kid related project.

In the future, keep sick leave as sick leave. You can offer unpaid time off to extend vacations, but, emergencies happen and emergency leave is essential.

I need some help choosing the right path here. We are working with our first nanny, who has been with us 8 months. We pay her $18.25/hour before taxes, which we withhold. 2 kids ages 1 and 3; 3 year old is in 1/2 day preschool 5 days/week. Ffx county. She is not a fluent English speaker, so there is a bit of a language barrier in our communications. She is lovely with the kids and they adore her. Our nanny agreement states 2 weeks vacation (1 we choose and 1 she chooses); 1 week PTO, and all federal holidays. After we hired her, we learned that she already had a 2 week trip home planned. She proposed and we allowed her to use her vacation week and week of PTO then. So she has no available sick leave. We let her take the kids with her to a monthly Drs appointment so she doesn't have to use unpaid leave for that.

Today she had to stay home with a terrible virus, which she caught from our kids. We offered her to make up the time later this week, even though we don't really need more hours, so she won't lose 8 hours of pay. I thought that was the kind thing to do, but she is giving me a guilt trip for not giving her the paid day, saying I pay her very little.

This is my first time employing a nanny, and I would like to be a kind, fair, predictable employer. Am I handeling this appropriately?