Anonymous wrote:I work with a 11mo as well and I can't imagine being able to 'teach' him to move his hand when he has it on my boob. I reposition his hand when he gets past my comfort zone, but that's about it. I'm more concerned with him stopping pulling on my hair every other minute!

I think it would be better if you just told the dad that you don't care and that it's completely normal for a baby so young, but that you're going to start teaching him boundaries once he's a bit older.

1.23 here. This is exactly what I meant. 2 and 3 year olds run up and shove their faces into adult crotches, not because they instinctively want to do that, but because they are only so tall. They need and want touch and comfort, and they reach out to their caregiver. It's normal, natural, and unless you are going to discourage all physical contact, DB can look forward to the child groping you and shoving his face into DB's crotch when he is walking.

I work with a 11mo as well and I can't imagine being able to 'teach' him to move his hand when he has it on my boob. I reposition his hand when he gets past my comfort zone, but that's about it. I'm more concerned with him stopping pulling on my hair every other minute!

I think it would be better if you just told the dad that you don't care and that it's completely normal for a baby so young, but that you're going to start teaching him boundaries once he's a bit older.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks. That makes total sense. And I could see where I would not want him to be quite as comfortable taking liberties with a babysitter or his music class teacher etc. The dad is gay, so he may also just be unsure about comfort level with boobs in general.

Hahahahahaha! I can see this. Maybe it makes DB uncomfortable b/c now he (DB) has to notice you have boobs ...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a child under 1year of age... most breastfed babies nurse until at least 12 months, so breasts serve as food machines, comfort and handy pillows at that age. You aren't going to be able to consistently teach a child that young not to rest the head or hand on a breast unless you never hold them, so why even try?

True, but I can encourage him to put his hand closer to my shoulder, esp. Since DB is uncomfortable.

Good thinking. That's how you can gradually learn appropriate social behavior.

Anonymous wrote:This is a child under 1year of age... most breastfed babies nurse until at least 12 months, so breasts serve as food machines, comfort and handy pillows at that age. You aren't going to be able to consistently teach a child that young not to rest the head or hand on a breast unless you never hold them, so why even try?

True, but I can encourage him to put his hand closer to my shoulder, esp. Since DB is uncomfortable.

This is a child under 1year of age... most breastfed babies nurse until at least 12 months, so breasts serve as food machines, comfort and handy pillows at that age. You aren't going to be able to consistently teach a child that young not to rest the head or hand on a breast unless you never hold them, so why even try?

While your charge is still very young to grasp anything inappropriate from his behavior (no pun intended), his father just may be trying to nip his behavior in the bud before he develops a habit that is much tougher to break.

Plus it also may make the dad feel a little uncomfortable when he sees his child do that to you around him.

I would be consistent & discourage the baby from doing those things if they truly make his father uncomfortable.

It's no big deal. The kid isn't trying to cop a feel or anything. He's just putting his hand in the nearest comfortable place.

Thanks. That makes total sense. And I could see where I would not want him to be quite as comfortable taking liberties with a babysitter or his music class teacher etc. The dad is gay, so he may also just be unsure about comfort level with boobs in general.

The dad might just be uncomfortable when he sees his kid do that. Hell I'm a mom and when DS was a baby and used to do something similar with friends I always felt a little awkward. It's one thing when it's your own kid touching your boob it's another when you are thinking "ok. My kid is obviously touching your boob. Does that make you uncomfortable? Should I say something or will it make you more uncomfortable that now you know I've noticed?".

I wouldnt necessarily curb the behavior, but if it's making the dad uncomfortable just reposition the baby's hand.

I work for a single dad with an 11mo old son. I've been with him basically since birth so he's very comfortable around me and, like a lot of young kids, treats me like furniture--holding onto my legs, climbing into my arms, plopping on my lap, etc. Often, when I hold him on my hip, he will rest on hand on my chest, not cupping my breast or anything, but I am pretty busty, so he'a definitely touching part of my boob. I never really noticed or paid any attention because it's just part of my body and he's a baby, NBD. But in the last few weeks, DB has made a few comments about how the baby is being rude and that it's not "nice" to pull on my shirt, etc. Should I try to break this habit? How?