I would watch the nanny the next few times you see Her disciplining the little boy.

Sure she may be more strict than the rest of you nannies, but a lot could depend on the little boy's temperament in general.

Then if you still feel as if she isn't treating the little boy fairly and adequately, I would speak to his mother directly.

Children are so vulnerable and at times need someone to step in and advocate for them.

This may be one of those times.

Good luck to you OP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old is the child? How does the child react to her?

OP here the child is 3.

In response to a few pp posters the mom does teach him self control, and is imho pretty firm on bad behaviors. However she handles it in a very respectful way(the mom) she gets down on his level, gives a warning, enforces a consequence, and then talks about it with him. The new nanny is harsh(ish) yells from across the playground, kinda has a perma scowl, and is not very upbeat or warm towards him. This is her 2nd week with him, and instead of trying to build a relationship with him she is constantly yelling and correcting him.

I think I have decided to just stay out of it for now and observe, I actually like the new nanny (to talk to) but her "style' is harsh.

With any toddler who is "a handful" and a parent who won't teach the child self-discipline (parenting, who knew?!), the nanny stepping in to the role has a rough road. It's a balancing act between teaching the child to control him or herself and going too fast. With a young child, it's easier to relax rules and enforcement later while starting out stricter. I've been told several times that I'm a little harsh initially (told by other nannies, not parents), but I always clear it with the parents first, so that they know how I will handle the situation. If I'm not given the opportunity to handle an out-of-control child (within reasonable parameters) as I see fit, I don't take the position.

Anonymous wrote:Mind your business. You said she isn't abusing him, and he can be a handful. If the mom tends to let a lot slide, this nanny could just be trying to get a handle on his behavior and establish herself as someone with whom the rules will be enforced.

+10000 I totally agree OP needs to stay out of it and worry about what she's doing at her own job with her charge

Worry about your own charge and stay out of it!

Yes, say something. A child is involved.

Mind your business. You said she isn't abusing him, and he can be a handful. If the mom tends to let a lot slide, this nanny could just be trying to get a handle on his behavior and establish herself as someone with whom the rules will be enforced.

Can you find her a new nanny, OP?

I would look for a time when you can chat with mom one-on-one and ask, "How's Larlo adjusting to Nanny?" It may be that mom already knows they are struggling and they are working on it. It may be that she has a suspicion things aren't right but isn't sure what it is exactly, and she may be missing it all. Feel her out first.

No. Unless she is abusing him, stay out of it

Yes, talk with her bout it. Not around everyone else in your playgroup. Let her know you want to have a chat and let her know your concerns.

If it does turn out badly and least you know you warned her.

Calling troll.

How old is the child? How does the child react to her?

A little background. We have a playgroup that consists of nannies, and few moms. One of the moms who is SAHM is expecting her 3rd child(in a month) she has hired a nanny(her first nanny/babysitter ever) who was referred to her by a member of our group(another nanny). The nanny who referred her is a friend, the mom who hired the nanny is a friend. The nanny who is working with the child is an acquaintance, who I have know for a year or so. Now we have all been meeting up together since the older children were little, so almost four years. The Nanny that has been hired is okay, she is a little short tempered, and kind of harsh(not abusive/even close) but very different than how the mom parents. I know the mom wouldn't like how the nanny is treating her son, but the son can be a handful. My question is should I mention it to the mom? I have know her a long time, and she is a friend of sorts, I respect her parenting, and I love her child. As nannies we all know that parents are much more lenient when dealing with their own kids, but this nanny is really short with him to the point where I am thinking of disrupting the group dynamic. I am not sure what to do, If I said something and it got back to the group it may cause problems. This has never come up before, we all "parent" is similar ways. I am not really one to say anything, but because the mom and I have know each other for so long I feel like I should, what are your thoughts?