Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell the TRUTH. This is the adult thing to do. You want to be treated like an adult with a REAL job then this is what you should do.

Never tell the truth .they will give bad reviews no matter how good nanny you were to their charge. It happened me on my last job so never going to use them as references.

I'm a different poster. While I see your point on protecting your references, here's why I think telling the truth CAN be good: if you're leaving because the bosses are hoarders or let their dog shit everywhere in the house or the parents don't discipline and won't let you either, they need to hear that. They need to know "Whoa, our house is such a pig sty that our nanny quit from the filth." "I guess when we were told to train our dog, we really should have listened." Sometimes people need a wakeup call, and it's often easiest to hear from someone they won't be seeing again.

new poster here.... pp you're oh so naïve.
It's is not nanny's job to shake their brains into getting their shit together. Had the nanny specifically said "I really do not appreciate the lack of organization skills and the low level of hygiene in your house. I have grown unaccustomed to this way of work and I believe we are not a good match anymore so I resign". Do you really think bosses would go "OHHH MY GOD WE ARE SUCH PIGS, WE JUST CAME TO THE REALIZATION THAT WE ARE LEAVING IN FILTH". hmmmm..... no.


to OP, reasons to use when quitting: I am going back to school for my masters; I have to go to XXXX for a month; I have decided to become a nurse and I need to prepare; I will need surgery at the end of the month; I am pregnant; my grandma is sick and I need to take care of her indefinitely; I have the opportunity of a lifetime, I was offered to go on Survivor (lol);

You could always say you are moving, that you have a close relative who is ill and needs daily care or that you have started taking a college course that will take up the majority of your time from now on.

Never, never, never tell the truth. It is not your responsibility to set anyone straight or help them see the light. Praise your employer, praise their children and lie through your teeth about a schedule change in your life and how very sad you are to have to leave them.

Do you have kids?

I have one, so I told my MB my son school and activities need more attention from me.

You can refrain from being deceptive without telling the whole truth. "I need to let you know that next Friday will be my last day; my plans are changing and I won't be able to provide care past my two weeks notice." is unemotional, truthful, and discloses nothing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell the TRUTH. This is the adult thing to do. You want to be treated like an adult with a REAL job then this is what you should do.

Never tell the truth .they will give bad reviews no matter how good nanny you were to their charge. It happened me on my last job so never going to use them as references.

I'm a different poster. While I see your point on protecting your references, here's why I think telling the truth CAN be good: if you're leaving because the bosses are hoarders or let their dog shit everywhere in the house or the parents don't discipline and won't let you either, they need to hear that. They need to know "Whoa, our house is such a pig sty that our nanny quit from the filth." "I guess when we were told to train our dog, we really should have listened." Sometimes people need a wakeup call, and it's often easiest to hear from someone they won't be seeing again.

Anonymous wrote:Tell the TRUTH. This is the adult thing to do. You want to be treated like an adult with a REAL job then this is what you should do.

Never tell the truth .they will give bad reviews no matter how good nanny you were to their charge. It happened me on my last job so never going to use them as references.

Make up a change in your schedule that you know is incompatible with the family's needs. NEVER tell the truth if it will hurt your employers -- and any mention of the condition of their home, themselves or their children will hurt them.

"I am going to start caring for my niece, nephew, grandchild, stepchild..." No one can argue with you wanting to care for your own family member.

I'm a huge fan of telling the truth also. It doesn't have to be the whole uncomfortable truth - it can be a sanitized version (I just feel I need something different... not the right fit for me any longer it isn't about you... etc...)

But, if you insist on telling a lie then it needs to be something they cannot counter (like more money), and it needs to be something they won't probe too much and can't discover as a lie.

Maybe something like "for personal reasons I am unable to continue in the job." If they press for answers you can always say "I'm sorry, but it's quite personal and I'd rather not talk about it."

That will deflect attention and you can offset anything that might result in a negative reference by giving lots of notice and giving 110% as you said.

I have used the old, "Our arrangement doesn't work for me anymore since I ______ (started school, got married, needed to spend more time with my sick mother, etc.). Basically anything that is the equivalent of the break-up excuse "It's not you, it's me."

Anonymous wrote:Tell the TRUTH. This is the adult thing to do. You want to be treated like an adult with a REAL job then this is what you should do.

Nonsense. Leaving a nanny job is like breaking up with someone - no one wants to hear the truth! It is very adult to not hurt another person (or insult children). Who wants to hear that their child is a brat, or that their house is a pig-sty, or that their husband hit on you? Seriously, PP, you are ridiculous.

OP, what about that you found another position in a field outside of nannying?

Tell the TRUTH. This is the adult thing to do. You want to be treated like an adult with a REAL job then this is what you should do.

"I was offered a position that pays much more and is closer to my home. While I love your children dearly, I have to do what is best for me and my family."

I need a couple good reasons (lies) as to why I would be leaving a part-time nanny position. Telling the truth is not a possibility - please trust me on that.

Of course I will give ample notice and work at 110% until my last day.


Thank you!