Anonymous
07/14/2015 22:28
Subject: Re:Free range nannies
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:This entire "free range" movement is another term for "lazy parenting". I would NEVER hire any nanny who said she was "free range".
Many adults, including myself were brought up under the "free range" mindset, which has created very self-reliant independent people. It's the youngest generation that is suffering under these overly cautious and involved parenting styles. It's a tradegy how some kids aren't expected to be responsible for themselves or anything for that matter!
That sounds like a rationalization for lazy parenting. I had parents who were very involved and I was very responsible as a teen and adult as my parents guided me through what I needed to know and do.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 22:26
Subject: Free range nannies
I'm unclear whether it's the kids in this scenario that are free range or the nanny...
Anonymous
07/14/2015 21:02
Subject: Re:Free range nannies
Anonymous wrote:This entire "free range" movement is another term for "lazy parenting". I would NEVER hire any nanny who said she was "free range".
Many adults, including myself were brought up under the "free range" mindset, which has created very self-reliant independent people. It's the youngest generation that is suffering under these overly cautious and involved parenting styles. It's a tradegy how some kids aren't expected to be responsible for themselves or anything for that matter!
Anonymous
07/14/2015 20:49
Subject: Re:Free range nannies
This entire "free range" movement is another term for "lazy parenting". I would NEVER hire any nanny who said she was "free range".
Anonymous
07/14/2015 15:48
Subject: Free range nannies
Nanny here. If I were the parents, I would definitely describe myself as "free range." As a nanny, there are obviously some major limits on how much freedom I can allow my charges due to liability. That said, I definitely prefer to work with families who view the role of parents and caregivers as supporting and being a resource to children in exploring their own boundaries, rather than on placing arbitrary boundaries for the children.
What this means in practice is that the rules and limits ai enforce are based on the demonstrated aptitude of my charges rather than being one-size-fits all. I also do not view it as a problem to be corrected every time I see them struggle; it is an opportunity for them to grow, so I try to offer help only if it is truly needed.
So my charges definitely do things that are more risky than some would permit.
My 6yo charge right now loves to cook and (via demonstrable understanding of and respect for safe limits) has worked his way up to being allowed to using a veggie peeler and steak knife as well as using the stove. He can make certain meals (scrambled eggs, tacos, soup from scratch) independently while I work on something else nearby.
His 4 yo sister loves to climb and I allow her to go as high as she wants. From the time she could walk, I never helped her climb up or down from any structure and she was allowed to fall many times as a 1yo, so by age 2, she had a strong sense that she was responsible for her own safety and is very cautious. She climbs very high, but always tests the strength of a structure before moving her weight onto it and always plans how she will get back down. She has not fallen off of any structure in my care in over a year.
The 2yo is permitted to play with some "choking hazard" items because she has shown that she will not put them in her mouth.
Now, all of these things I am close by (supervising the cooking and legos and spotting the climber), but I let them take risks because I (and their parents) believe they will be safer overall if we teach them that THEY are responsible for making safe choices, rather than that WE are responsible for keeping them safe.
What this means in practice is that the rules and limits ai enforce are based on the demonstrated aptitude of my charges rather than being one-size-fits all. I also do not view it as a problem to be corrected every time I see them struggle; it is an opportunity for them to grow, so I try to offer help only if it is truly needed.
So my charges definitely do things that are more risky than some would permit.
My 6yo charge right now loves to cook and (via demonstrable understanding of and respect for safe limits) has worked his way up to being allowed to using a veggie peeler and steak knife as well as using the stove. He can make certain meals (scrambled eggs, tacos, soup from scratch) independently while I work on something else nearby.
His 4 yo sister loves to climb and I allow her to go as high as she wants. From the time she could walk, I never helped her climb up or down from any structure and she was allowed to fall many times as a 1yo, so by age 2, she had a strong sense that she was responsible for her own safety and is very cautious. She climbs very high, but always tests the strength of a structure before moving her weight onto it and always plans how she will get back down. She has not fallen off of any structure in my care in over a year.
The 2yo is permitted to play with some "choking hazard" items because she has shown that she will not put them in her mouth.
Now, all of these things I am close by (supervising the cooking and legos and spotting the climber), but I let them take risks because I (and their parents) believe they will be safer overall if we teach them that THEY are responsible for making safe choices, rather than that WE are responsible for keeping them safe.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 15:24
Subject: Free range nannies
I don't think "free range" is a term that would apply to nannying. Parents might adopt the approach, but it's not something a nanny can realistically do; it's not her call, and it's too much liability to ask a non-parent to take on.
But free range parents might be interested in a nanny with Montessori training who's less inclined to meddle, and instead focus on having an environment suitable for child-led exploration and experimentation. Or maybe a nanny with experience as an outdoor camp leader who can keep the kids occupied outside much of the time. There are plenty of good nanny approaches that could compliment a free-range parenting style.
But free range parents might be interested in a nanny with Montessori training who's less inclined to meddle, and instead focus on having an environment suitable for child-led exploration and experimentation. Or maybe a nanny with experience as an outdoor camp leader who can keep the kids occupied outside much of the time. There are plenty of good nanny approaches that could compliment a free-range parenting style.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 15:04
Subject: Free range nannies
Your helpers who require micromanagement are sitters, not nannies.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 13:30
Subject: Free range nannies
Anonymous wrote:I had a terrible, terrible experience with a nanny who wanted "free range." She didn't use the term but she told me that she knows how to do her job. It was my first child and first nanny. Now if I ever run into this style of nanny again, I will run the other way.
This is a nice marketing spin on "I will do whatever I want, my way and ignore parents."
This free range nanny even did cry it out with my child when I expressly told her that we do attachment parenting and to never ever let the child do cry it out. One day I cam home and she said "oh you might not like this but I have been letting ___ cry it out to sleep for naps."
Nanny is not the parent. They do not get to make decisions on behalf of the parent on parenting styles, period. If nanny and parents are on the same page, great. If they are on different pages, it is always by the parents book or they get fired, period. If there is any ambiguity on this matter, you should not be a nanny.
What are you trying to prove here?
Anonymous
07/14/2015 12:32
Subject: Free range nannies
Anonymous wrote:I had a terrible, terrible experience with a nanny who wanted "free range." She didn't use the term but she told me that she knows how to do her job. It was my first child and first nanny. Now if I ever run into this style of nanny again, I will run the other way.
This is a nice marketing spin on "I will do whatever I want, my way and ignore parents."
This free range nanny even did cry it out with my child when I expressly told her that we do attachment parenting and to never ever let the child do cry it out. One day I cam home and she said "oh you might not like this but I have been letting ___ cry it out to sleep for naps."
Nanny is not the parent. They do not get to make decisions on behalf of the parent on parenting styles, period. If nanny and parents are on the same page, great. If they are on different pages, it is always by the parents book or they get fired, period. If there is any ambiguity on this matter, you should not be a nanny.
What you are describing has nothing to do with the free range style of child rearing, please don't confuse the two.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 12:17
Subject: Free range nannies
Free range = I will barely supervise or do anything for you kids so they can learn to fend for themselves, but I will be instantly available for my pay check.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 11:47
Subject: Free range nannies
I had a terrible, terrible experience with a nanny who wanted "free range." She didn't use the term but she told me that she knows how to do her job. It was my first child and first nanny. Now if I ever run into this style of nanny again, I will run the other way.
This is a nice marketing spin on "I will do whatever I want, my way and ignore parents."
This free range nanny even did cry it out with my child when I expressly told her that we do attachment parenting and to never ever let the child do cry it out. One day I cam home and she said "oh you might not like this but I have been letting ___ cry it out to sleep for naps."
Nanny is not the parent. They do not get to make decisions on behalf of the parent on parenting styles, period. If nanny and parents are on the same page, great. If they are on different pages, it is always by the parents book or they get fired, period. If there is any ambiguity on this matter, you should not be a nanny.
This is a nice marketing spin on "I will do whatever I want, my way and ignore parents."
This free range nanny even did cry it out with my child when I expressly told her that we do attachment parenting and to never ever let the child do cry it out. One day I cam home and she said "oh you might not like this but I have been letting ___ cry it out to sleep for naps."
Nanny is not the parent. They do not get to make decisions on behalf of the parent on parenting styles, period. If nanny and parents are on the same page, great. If they are on different pages, it is always by the parents book or they get fired, period. If there is any ambiguity on this matter, you should not be a nanny.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 11:32
Subject: Free range nannies
"Free Range"' is a very ambiguous term. I'm a nanny whose matches with families who practice REI (tons of independent play) and natural consequences. If kiddo is climbing on a elevated surface (not higher than their own height), after he/she has been removed repeatedly, maybe even warned, and goes back to the same area, I will then choose to let them reap their own consequences (potentially falling etc.) of course, the adult must access the situation and make sure kiddos are safe at all times, but I think it's very important for kids to get hurt and experience their own choices...its apart of growing up without adults negatively hindering/altering /cuddling them!
Anonymous
07/14/2015 11:22
Subject: Free range nannies
There are allot of nanny facebook groups where nannies often say how free range they are and wont work in a home that does not work that way. Personally I agree even if a nanny is free range to her own kids should never use this with other parents kids,
Anonymous
07/14/2015 11:10
Subject: Free range nannies
MB here. I've never heard a nanny use that term.
The whole "free range" movement is ridiculously subjective and unclear.
I set the guidelines for my kids and the nanny adheres to them. We've never had a difference of opinion on anything related to general oversight and attention.
In general I think it's smart for a nanny to err on the side of cautiousness. If any risks are taken w/ my kids they should only happen on my watch.
The whole "free range" movement is ridiculously subjective and unclear.
I set the guidelines for my kids and the nanny adheres to them. We've never had a difference of opinion on anything related to general oversight and attention.
In general I think it's smart for a nanny to err on the side of cautiousness. If any risks are taken w/ my kids they should only happen on my watch.
Anonymous
07/14/2015 11:06
Subject: Free range nannies
MB's what is your opinion of nannies who claim to be free range? How much do you let a nanny be free range and do you think it is a safe way to provide childcare?