Why don't you just sacrifice a bit more, OP, and you could SAH with your child? I am sure they would prefer to have mommy there, and you could certainly take a few classes and do some reading on child development and find some fun things to do during the day.
I know that my husband and I have always been much more devoted to our children and done a much better job with them than our nanny or friends nannies have done.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, et al, sacrificing for your children is what good parents do and you need to stop patting yourselves on the back and vying for the Novel prize in parenting.

Really? Then why do so many parents stick their babies in daycare for 10 - 12 hours a day while taking vacations to Hawaii and buying new houses?

Sorry, I do think that any parent you sacrifices to do what is best for their child deserves a pat on the back.

Because this is their decision and everyone has the right t I make this decision for. themselves. The absolute best choice for a child is to be cared for by it's mother, so why don't you stay home?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with PP, about OP et al, patting themselves on the back. I'm a nanny btw. Some ppl put their kids in daycare because they're not comfortable with having a nanny and that's okay. I put my child in daycare because I, myself, am a nanny and if I need to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. There's no need to develop some type of superiority complex because you " sacrifice" for a nanny. I know a lot of well to do folks choose daycare because it's the best option for them. There's enough kids to supply both daycare and nannies with income.

I'm a mom also using savings to pay our nanny, but I agree 100% with this poster. We use a nanny because it is much more convenient and allows us to decide how our children will spend their days, but a good daycare offers different but equal benefits, especially for children over 2 IMO.

NP here and I disagree in that I don't think that daycare has equal benefits over a nanny even for a two-year-old. I want my kids to have the security that only napping in their own beds and being with one person devoted to their well-being can give them. Between 2 and 3 a few morning classes a week and some park time are really all kids need to thrive. By three a half-day preschool is perfect.

We most definitely sacrifice to pay for a nanny for our now 1.5 yr old. She is fantastic and my son is growing leaps and bounds in a secure and loving environment in his own home. Our nanny (who is extraordinary) is actually better at teaching him that I am.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with PP, about OP et al, patting themselves on the back. I'm a nanny btw. Some ppl put their kids in daycare because they're not comfortable with having a nanny and that's okay. I put my child in daycare because I, myself, am a nanny and if I need to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. There's no need to develop some type of superiority complex because you " sacrifice" for a nanny. I know a lot of well to do folks choose daycare because it's the best option for them. There's enough kids to supply both daycare and nannies with income.

I'm a mom also using savings to pay our nanny, but I agree 100% with this poster. We use a nanny because it is much more convenient and allows us to decide how our children will spend their days, but a good daycare offers different but equal benefits, especially for children over 2 IMO.

Ignore the word "if"

I agree with PP, about OP et al, patting themselves on the back. I'm a nanny btw. Some ppl put their kids in daycare because they're not comfortable with having a nanny and that's okay. I put my child in daycare because I, myself, am a nanny and if I need to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. There's no need to develop some type of superiority complex because you " sacrifice" for a nanny. I know a lot of well to do folks choose daycare because it's the best option for them. There's enough kids to supply both daycare and nannies with income.

Unfortunately you may be.

I think it is highly commendable the sacrifices that you have made to ensure your child is in good care. And that you also recognize in order to have this luxury, your family needs to sacrifice financially for it.

I think many families want it both ways these days. Meaning they want the educated + experienced nanny, yet on the other hand they also do not want to shell out the dough that a good nanny commands. They want the best of both worlds.

Anyone w/any ounce of common sense should figure out that when it comes to their precious children, no one should leave anything simply to chance. No one!

Yet parents do it all the time.

My employers have a nanny because it's cheaper then daycare. With 3 young toddlers daycare is about 1,000 per week. I make a lot less then that. They also get their house kept tidy, meals cooked, laundry done.

Unfortunately they don't pay for activities so we just go to the park most days and the local library once a month for story time. They don't have a backyard but I try my best to make the days fun for them on a budget of nothing.

Anonymous wrote:OP, et al, sacrificing for your children is what good parents do and you need to stop patting yourselves on the back and vying for the Novel prize in parenting.

Wow - someone is cranky this morning. Relax, PP, it is Sunday.

Anonymous wrote:OP, et al, sacrificing for your children is what good parents do and you need to stop patting yourselves on the back and vying for the Novel prize in parenting.

Really? Then why do so many parents stick their babies in daycare for 10 - 12 hours a day while taking vacations to Hawaii and buying new houses?

Sorry, I do think that any parent you sacrifices to do what is best for their child deserves a pat on the back.

^^^Nobel, although Novel prize isn't bad.

OP, et al, sacrificing for your children is what good parents do and you need to stop patting yourselves on the back and vying for the Novel prize in parenting.

Nanny here and my employers definitely are sacrificing to have me. They are in a rental apartment and don't got out much at all. They are both Ivy League educated, both with advanced degrees, and both feel that a nanny is the best option for their children's future as well as their present security and education.

I respect their sacrifice. They are wonderful parents and terrific employers.

No, OP, we sacrifice for a good nanny over daycare, too. So do a number of our closest friends. Like everything else, it is about priorities. We rent and don't take expensive vacations (we visit parents for our vacations). We consider our nanny to be our kids first step in education centering on emotional security.

But to each his own. A lot of parents feel than daycare is better for their kids even if they can afford a nanny (and all nannies are not created equal! A lousy nanny is worse than a good daycare).

I have a good job but DH has gone back to graduate school so mine is our only paycheck. When DC was born, we looked at daycares and were not impressed. We chose to go with a nanny and hired a very well-educated nanny with years of experience. She is wonderful and DC adores her. She has his days filled with classes, activities and is extremely imaginative and energetic. Pretty much every day we come home and he has learned something new.

We rent, use some of our savings to cover her salary and rarely go out to eat. I feel the sacrifice is well worth it for DC's emotional security and education. But I am surprised by how many on the General Forum, who own homes and take vacations, say they cannot afford a nanny and have their child in daycare.

Am I alone in this?