Anonymous wrote:Please make sure your nanny has opportunities to see your daughter - birthday parties and/or evening babysitting. This will be so hard on your DD if the nanny is torn from her life and never heard from again.

I loved my nanny and she quit/was fired (I, to this day have never gotten the straight story and never heard my nanny's side) when I was six - I was devastated. My parents thought it would be easier for me to just never see or talk to her again but it was the opposite. I felt that I had done something so wrong to have made her leave.

+1 I had the same situation with my father's girlfriend from when I was between 4 and 8. When she and my Dad broke up, a child psychologist told them that it would be better if she didn't see or contact me. I was devastated. This woman was amazing, loving, funny and such a great influence on me. I found her again after I was an adult and we have established a wonderful relationship again. But I truly missed her when I was growing up even though I had loving parents.

I will never let a nanny simply walk out of my children's lives. It is cruel to the child.

Anonymous wrote:Please make sure your nanny has opportunities to see your daughter - birthday parties and/or evening babysitting. This will be so hard on your DD if the nanny is torn from her life and never heard from again.

I loved my nanny and she quit/was fired (I, to this day have never gotten the straight story and never heard my nanny's side) when I was six - I was devastated. My parents thought it would be easier for me to just never see or talk to her again but it was the opposite. I felt that I had done something so wrong to have made her leave.

Thank you sharing this. As a nanny, I wonder about the children I've lost contact with. I wish I knew they're doing well. I put 'my everything' into the love and care I provided them.

I wish parents had some understanding of this phenomenon.
Stability of care is so very important.

My weekly paycheck with my last family always ended in .50 cents. I was with them for 3 years, always thought we had a wonderful relationship, etc. For my last paycheck not only did I not get a thank you bonus but the family actually stiffed me those .50 cents. I know it was on purpose because MB has written that check hundreds of times with .50 cents at the end and then this time she wrote .00 and didn't write the .50 cent part on the line. She must have noticed it was different. I assume it was a purposeful message. Really hurt =(

So OP, thanks for taking care of your nanny so well.

Please make sure your nanny has opportunities to see your daughter - birthday parties and/or evening babysitting. This will be so hard on your DD if the nanny is torn from her life and never heard from again.

I loved my nanny and she quit/was fired (I, to this day have never gotten the straight story and never heard my nanny's side) when I was six - I was devastated. My parents thought it would be easier for me to just never see or talk to her again but it was the opposite. I felt that I had done something so wrong to have made her leave.

I think this is one of those situations where if you can you go outside of your contact. You have had a great nanny for 4 years!

If we are going strictly by contract she could up and leave you and just give 2 weeks notice I mean she doesn't need you all anymore she knows her time with you is ending she only owes you the minimum.

If you can giver her 2 to 4 weeks pay do it just as a thank you!

Anonymous wrote:MB here--what does your contract say? Will you be helping her to find a new position? I think our contract says 1 month's notice of when the final date would be, and severance if we fail to do that (so, if we give 3 weeks' notice, we owe 1 week severance).

This is what we do also. Contract says one months' notice for either party (except in cases of immediate dismissal for cause.) So our minimum notice we would give our nanny would be a month, but it's more likely we'd have her work for only some portion of that time and just pay her the balance (and probably something extra as a thank you if we're parting on good terms.)

MB here--what does your contract say? Will you be helping her to find a new position? I think our contract says 1 month's notice of when the final date would be, and severance if we fail to do that (so, if we give 3 weeks' notice, we owe 1 week severance).

Anonymous wrote:I received two months salary after leaving one long term position.

Sure you did. Again I say, bully for you.

I received two months salary after leaving one long term position.

MB (not OP) here. While one week per year is a lovely idea, I wouldn't be able to afford an entire extra month of salary easily.

OP - What about two weeks of her net pay amount as a parting gift? This is skirting the taxable income piece a bit but might let you be more generous more easily.

The truth though, is that the fact that you're giving your nanny 6 months notice, combined with a week's salary, is already terrific. You have nothing to feel badly about.

Yes. One week's pay per each year of service, then round up.

And don't forget to write a glowing letter of recommendation.

I would do one weeks pay for every
year of service, with a minimum of
three weeks.

1 months salary.

My DD will be starting pre-k in the fall. We've had her excellent nanny since birth. The nanny knows that we'll be moving on to pre-k in September. What time of cash gift is appropriate for her? We paid in the mid-teens for her hourly wage. She's been excellent, so we need to pay her nicely. DH doesn't agree. He thinks a week's pay is sufficient. I think that is ridiculous. WWYD?