Anonymous
12/09/2014 02:12
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
I would tell her only what I saw, + that is him holding hand and kidding w/other women, etc. Do not use the word "cheating" when telling her what you saw. Let your nanny determine if that is what he is doing. Just state the facts and let her decide what to do w/the information.
But yes, I think you should tell her what you know.
As your nanny, if I had a close working relationship w/you and I was in your home on a regular basis, taking excellent care of your children, then later found out you had first-hand knowledge that my boyfriend was holding hands w/other women and never disclosed that to me, I would feel very betrayed by that fact. Unfair? Maybe, but life is seldom fair.
But yes, I think you should tell her what you know.
As your nanny, if I had a close working relationship w/you and I was in your home on a regular basis, taking excellent care of your children, then later found out you had first-hand knowledge that my boyfriend was holding hands w/other women and never disclosed that to me, I would feel very betrayed by that fact. Unfair? Maybe, but life is seldom fair.
Anonymous
12/08/2014 21:30
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
I would tell her because I would want to know if it was my BF/DH. She could do whatever she wanted with the information and I wouldn't bring the subject up again.
Anonymous
12/08/2014 09:20
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Stay out of it. That rule about good fences make good neighbors is true for nanny/employer relationships also. A solid work/personal boundary serves everyone well. If you get involved in her personal life this way it will complicate the relationship for you greatly, and might be extremely difficult for her as well.
Your nanny is not your best friend. Stay out of her personal life as much as possible.
Also, imagine the relationship ending in a probably predictably dramatic and painful way for her. Perhaps it would be far better for her to be able to go to her job and know that's a refuge from what's going on in her personal life. You don't want an employee who sees you as a confidante on a day when you really need her to be at her best on the job - right?
Your nanny is not your best friend. Stay out of her personal life as much as possible.
Also, imagine the relationship ending in a probably predictably dramatic and painful way for her. Perhaps it would be far better for her to be able to go to her job and know that's a refuge from what's going on in her personal life. You don't want an employee who sees you as a confidante on a day when you really need her to be at her best on the job - right?
Anonymous
12/07/2014 23:47
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
I would want to know. Anonymous letter.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 21:50
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Do you wa n t to be told if someone sees your DH gooling around. This. Is something you do not tell her anout.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 21:16
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
I'd want to know.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 21:02
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Anonymous wrote:MB here. I know some will call troll but I'm not. My nanny is a wonderful young woman. She is dating a man a little older than herself. We are in the same law industry and she showed me a picture of them. I recognized him immediately. I work closely with his office. The shocking part is she said they have been together for a year but I've seen him with multiple women ( holding hands, kidding, etc.). He is known as a player around the offices. I feel guilty knowing this information. My DH said stay out of it but I don't like seeing her talk about their great relationship and plans with him knowing he is cheating. Nannies what would you prefer an employer do in this situation?[/quote
Take some pictures and show her the true ...
Anonymous
12/07/2014 16:46
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:How do you know they're exclusive?
If your boss saw your husband out with a woman, would you want her to tell you? Seems like a very awkward conversation.
I have a great relationship with our nanny. I know for a fact they are exclusive.
I have a great relationship with my nanny family. They definitely don't know the ins and outs of my relationship and would probably be shocked if they saw my girlfriend out with someone else too. I, on the other hand, would not.
It's none of your business. There is no way you telling her will end well, for anyone.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 16:30
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:How do you know they're exclusive?
If your boss saw your husband out with a woman, would you want her to tell you? Seems like a very awkward conversation.
I have a great relationship with our nanny. I know for a fact they are exclusive.
Perhaps she gives him a hall pass sometimes? Or they have an open relationship?
Anonymous
12/07/2014 16:12
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Stay out of it. Not enough facts here or "catching in the act" to set off a cycle of drama. Yuck. Sounds like drama-ville high school or something. Who has time for that?!?
Anonymous
12/07/2014 15:44
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Anonymous wrote:How do you know they're exclusive?
If your boss saw your husband out with a woman, would you want her to tell you? Seems like a very awkward conversation.
I have a great relationship with our nanny. I know for a fact they are exclusive.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 15:38
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
Send her an anonymous letter and tell her what you know.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 15:22
Subject: Re:I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
No, of course do not tell her. She will only hate you for it. You are not her friend, OP, and if she does believe you - she will resent you for knowing; if she doesn't believe you - she will resent you for bad-mouthing her boyfriend. Lose/lose.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 15:12
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
How do you know they're exclusive?
If your boss saw your husband out with a woman, would you want her to tell you? Seems like a very awkward conversation.
If your boss saw your husband out with a woman, would you want her to tell you? Seems like a very awkward conversation.
Anonymous
12/07/2014 14:24
Subject: I saw my nanny's boyfriend cheating - do I tell her?
MB here. I know some will call troll but I'm not. My nanny is a wonderful young woman. She is dating a man a little older than herself. We are in the same law industry and she showed me a picture of them. I recognized him immediately. I work closely with his office. The shocking part is she said they have been together for a year but I've seen him with multiple women ( holding hands, kidding, etc.). He is known as a player around the offices. I feel guilty knowing this information. My DH said stay out of it but I don't like seeing her talk about their great relationship and plans with him knowing he is cheating. Nannies what would you prefer an employer do in this situation?