It is not your responsibility to give normalcy and stabity. This is their parents job. No matter what you do, you are going to end up in their mess and forced to choose sides. You need to get out now.

You need to sit down with MB and DB at the same time and clarify what is going on. Acknowledge that this is a stressful time but keep the conversation centered on their child.

-Do they have a custody schedule arranged or are they "winging it" for now?
-Who should you be communicating with for schedule changes?
-Ask about who should be contacted first in a situation where MB is handing off and DB is picking up but NK has a fever.
-Find out what NK has been told about the situation so you can be better equipped to handle any questions from NK.
-Make sure you're covered with who is handling your paychecks.

It can be a really messy situation so stay out of their marital conflicts. No screenshots of conversations or "he said/she said". You're a professional and a neutral party and your job in this is to keep some normalcy and stability in NK's life.

A nanny can be the thing that makes separation less damaging for the entire family. When our home was sold as part of the divorce settlement everyone had to adjust to new surroundings. Our nanny was the one who knew all of our kids friends and their play dates. She made sure to maintain those relationships. Our nanny knew which comfort objects our kids couldn't sleep without, she always checked the bag for them. We knew how valuable she was so we made sure to treat her well in order to keep her with our kids.

Run...

If this job is to work out, you need to make it clear to BOTH parents that you are to remain a neutral party in their marital issues and they cannot personally involve you in taking sides with either of them.

You have only one vested interest here and that is the sake of the kids.

You are a professional and you want to keep things on a professional level with the parents.

If they cannot agree to or follow your wishes, then your only option is to walk out the door.

There is no other option.

This divorce sounds like it is going to get super ugly and bitter and the last thing you need is to get subpoenaed into a divorce hearing.

Get out. This will get worse and worse until you end up in a new fresh hell called divorce court. It SUCKS and will age you ten years for every hour you're on the stand being pummeled with questions.

Tell them you will not be in the middle, you will answer each persons questions truthfully and you will be looking for a new job.

I very rarely see DB so do I just deal with mb? And should I send her snapshot pics when DB texts me

Get out
Do not let them put you in the middle of their domestic mess.

Personally, I'd let them know that for the least chance of confusion and error that you need days to be designated either mother days or father days. Whoever is there when you begin care of the child in the morning is the only one you will meet or communicate with that day and the only one you will release the child to that evening.

If that is not workable for them, I'd ask for a written schedule, weekly with who has the child in the morning and the evening, and if there are any midday "visits" I'd insist they both sign off on the schedule.

So sorry you are in the middle of this.

Also I noticed brusing on MB....

So it looks like my mb and DB are getting a divorce.
I have been with this family for exactly 1 year today. Heres some background info.
I've had an inkling for about 4 months that things were heading south. The oldest charge has told me that he sleeps with MB in her bed and for the last 2 months I've seen blankets on the couch in spare room and know it was from DB sleeping there. I've also felt the tension so I'm not surprised...
About 3 weeks ago I witnessed an incident that confirms MB is or was cheering on DB.
Mb told me last week that they are separates and DB is living in the carrage house. She asked me not to reply to his messages if he asks if she was home or where she was. But now I am stuck in the middle. I have DB calling me to create appointments for the kids next week and arrange a time to meet them. And she want a me to let her know what I communixste with him. So I'm not sure what to do. I want to keep the job and be consistant for the kids but I feel like I need to walk a thin line. Anyone btdt?