I am a nanny so I may have no right posting on this thread but...

I would think that any good mother would be concerned about their child/children losing a beloved nanny but not about themselves. I'd been with my charge since he was 10 weeks old and his mother knows how attached he is to me - she's a very good mother and I am certain she would be concerned with her child's reaction or heartbreak at being away from me for the first time in his life. And although MB and I do like each other and, more importantly, respect each other - I honestly don't think she would feel much of anything but concern for her child if she needed to leave me behind. I would absolutely miss my wonderful charge but I wouldn't give MB or DB much of a second thought. (And I don't mean that cruelly). They are my employers and the parents of a child I love - but I have no bond with the parents.

Anonymous wrote:OP, it sounds like you are very young.

Jobs end all the time. All of us would like guaranteed job security, but that isn't the way life goes.

Move on. Take care of yourself. Wish your NF well.

You're right. Here today, gone tomorrow. Learn to chase the highest paying job, just like your employers?

OP, it sounds like you are very young.

Jobs end all the time. All of us would like guaranteed job security, but that isn't the way life goes.

Move on. Take care of yourself. Wish your NF well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.

You need to work through some things. You have been with this family for what, like 4 months? It is just not healthy or normal for you to be dwelling on this so much so that you need to start TWO threads on the topic. How much more sympathy do you require?

I have no issue to work through. I am very upset about having been blindsided and have to look for a new position when days earlier, I spoke with MB about future play-dates, classes, etc., only to be be given notice days later. I know I will find a new family but I am upset about lack of any commitment on their part. I've had numerous mothers try to poach me to be their nanny but I declined out of loyalty. I worked my school schedule around my work schedule, only to have this happen. I undertand it happens but I am contemplating being less loyal and trusting in future families.

Well said, OP. Many of us nannies have been taken advantage of, in similar ways. It's heartless. The parenting methods of such parents boil down to a spread sheet and net worth.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I'm a nanny and I agree that you need to calm down a little bit. I have been with the same family for 5 years and planned to be with them for 3 more (they just had a new baby). The MB was offered a new job across the country, close to where her parents live, and she jumped at the opportunity to be near them. Unfortunately, she had to make the transition in one month. Am I sad? Of course. I've helped raise 2 of their children and am sad I will not get the opportunity with the 3rd. Over the last 5 years we've developed an amazing relationship and I cherish it. I think it's a little off that you are posting multiple posts about a family that you have been with for only a few months and how betrayed you feel...like the PP said, if you had a major life change you would need to give notice as well. Life happens. They are not married to you, they are not dropping you for a cheaper nanny, they are making a major life change that is good for THEM. Get over yourself.

+5. Chill out, woman.

You think very highly of yourself to say you are the beloved nanny after only 3 months with this family

Honestly, I'm a nanny and I agree that you need to calm down a little bit. I have been with the same family for 5 years and planned to be with them for 3 more (they just had a new baby). The MB was offered a new job across the country, close to where her parents live, and she jumped at the opportunity to be near them. Unfortunately, she had to make the transition in one month. Am I sad? Of course. I've helped raise 2 of their children and am sad I will not get the opportunity with the 3rd. Over the last 5 years we've developed an amazing relationship and I cherish it. I think it's a little off that you are posting multiple posts about a family that you have been with for only a few months and how betrayed you feel...like the PP said, if you had a major life change you would need to give notice as well. Life happens. They are not married to you, they are not dropping you for a cheaper nanny, they are making a major life change that is good for THEM. Get over yourself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.

You need to work through some things. You have been with this family for what, like 4 months? It is just not healthy or normal for you to be dwelling on this so much so that you need to start TWO threads on the topic. How much more sympathy do you require?

I have no issue to work through. I am very upset about having been blindsided and have to look for a new position when days earlier, I spoke with MB about future play-dates, classes, etc., only to be be given notice days later. I know I will find a new family but I am upset about lack of any commitment on their part. I've had numerous mothers try to poach me to be their nanny but I declined out of loyalty. I worked my school schedule around my work schedule, only to have this happen. I undertand it happens but I am contemplating being less loyal and trusting in future families.

Well said, OP. Many of us nannies have been taken advantage of, in similar ways. It's heartless. The parenting methods of such parents boil down to a spread sheet and net worth.

Oh shove it.

They are moving out of state for work, not dropping the nanny to pay for a cheaper one. This is hardly "heartless," it's the reality of life.

OP I agree that it was not ideal that your MB kept up the pretense of your staying long-term if she knew the job transfer was a possibility, but who knows what went on behind closed doors. Maybe she was completely opposed to the move and was proceeding accordingly, assuming that her husband wouldn't take it. Then, for whatever reason, they decided they needed to. Or maybe it was a very last minute offer that required a quick response. It does you no good to make assumptions and I really agree with the PP that you need to get over it.

If you'd gotten engaged (another life event that often happens quickly and at least somewhat by surprise) and your fiancé needed to move out of state for work, you'd have needed to give notice too - despite all of your intentions and assurances that you wanted to stay. Life is just like that. It isn't personal and it isn't disrespectful, it's just reality.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.

You need to work through some things. You have been with this family for what, like 4 months? It is just not healthy or normal for you to be dwelling on this so much so that you need to start TWO threads on the topic. How much more sympathy do you require?

I have no issue to work through. I am very upset about having been blindsided and have to look for a new position when days earlier, I spoke with MB about future play-dates, classes, etc., only to be be given notice days later. I know I will find a new family but I am upset about lack of any commitment on their part. I've had numerous mothers try to poach me to be their nanny but I declined out of loyalty. I worked my school schedule around my work schedule, only to have this happen. I undertand it happens but I am contemplating being less loyal and trusting in future families.

Well said, OP. Many of us nannies have been taken advantage of, in similar ways. It's heartless. The parenting methods of such parents boil down to a spread sheet and net worth.

Anonymous wrote:It's fine. My children are sweet and like anybody who's kind to them. They'll have no problem bonding with a new nanny. Plus, we're excited and distracted about the upcoming changes going on in our lives.

Clueless.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.

You need to work through some things. You have been with this family for what, like 4 months? It is just not healthy or normal for you to be dwelling on this so much so that you need to start TWO threads on the topic. How much more sympathy do you require?

I have no issue to work through. I am very upset about having been blindsided and have to look for a new position when days earlier, I spoke with MB about future play-dates, classes, etc., only to be be given notice days later. I know I will find a new family but I am upset about lack of any commitment on their part. I've had numerous mothers try to poach me to be their nanny but I declined out of loyalty. I worked my school schedule around my work schedule, only to have this happen. I undertand it happens but I am contemplating being less loyal and trusting in future families.

Read the Harvard research paper,

"Manufacturing Motherhood:
The Shadow Work of Nannies and Au Pairs".

I find it most enlightening with regard to OP's bewilderment.

It's fine. My children are sweet and like anybody who's kind to them. They'll have no problem bonding with a new nanny. Plus, we're excited and distracted about the upcoming changes going on in our lives.

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.

You need to work through some things. You have been with this family for what, like 4 months? It is just not healthy or normal for you to be dwelling on this so much so that you need to start TWO threads on the topic. How much more sympathy do you require?

I am the poster of my nanny family abruptly moving for a job offer. I am still in a state of shock because I got an apartment closer to them and MB and I just discussed future stuff days before they informed me. They did offer to help me to find a position, told me how much they loved me and were worried about my charge leaving me, and half-jokingly stated that I come with them. I am very shocked because we both agreed on long-term and they were very tied to their jobs. I didn't see this happening and I know it's a tough decision on their part. MB had to quit a job she loved.


How do you MB's feel about leaving a nanny behind or letting a beloved nanny go? Does it suck just as much for you as the nanny? I know it wasn't their intentions but it sucks that I will now be out of a job and have to look for another quickly. Weigh in please.