Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only job I ever quit because of unhappiness was for a MB who had 3 kids, one with special needs, and she focused all her time, attention, and love on the two typical children and ignored the third. It hurt my heart too much to stay with them, I couldn't keep feeling like I was the only person who cared for that sweet child.

But by quitting the job, you in a sense, abandoned that sweet child too thus a double whammy.

Indeed, but at some point, healthy boundaries are essential. The nanny eventually had to do the right thing, and she did. Good for her.

Anonymous wrote:The only job I ever quit because of unhappiness was for a MB who had 3 kids, one with special needs, and she focused all her time, attention, and love on the two typical children and ignored the third. It hurt my heart too much to stay with them, I couldn't keep feeling like I was the only person who cared for that sweet child.

But by quitting the job, you in a sense, abandoned that sweet child too thus a double whammy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had to give my notice recently because the older child is too difficult and I can't handle him. I just take care of his toddler brother now. I have been nannying for him for almost 2 years. They asked me to take care of the 4 y/o in the summer. It was a difficult choice because I love the little one! I just know the 4 y/o would make me unhappy.

This, exactly, (including ironically, the ages of the kids), is why I left my last job and found a new one. I adored the baby, had been there since he was brand new, but the 4yo? No thank you. Kid was a hellion and a brat. No amount of money would or could have convinced me to stay and take care of him.

This is also why I am giving notice too! Wow. It makes me feel better to know other nannies have gone through the same thing. This is SO hard for me because I love the baby. There's just something about this baby that I love and I have taken care of lots of babies. It's just that I really love this baby and haven't felt so attached in my other jobs.

Anonymous wrote:If you need to ask, leave.
Life is too short.
Let them live and learn, or not.

:

Anonymous wrote:I had to give my notice recently because the older child is too difficult and I can't handle him. I just take care of his toddler brother now. I have been nannying for him for almost 2 years. They asked me to take care of the 4 y/o in the summer. It was a difficult choice because I love the little one! I just know the 4 y/o would make me unhappy.

This, exactly, (including ironically, the ages of the kids), is why I left my last job and found a new one. I adored the baby, had been there since he was brand new, but the 4yo? No thank you. Kid was a hellion and a brat. No amount of money would or could have convinced me to stay and take care of him.

I have been in unique situations where I just knew I couldn't take another minute in that situation. If I wake up with that dreaded feeling of, "Oh no...I don't wanna go to work today..." or I feel like crying every day when I leave, then I know that my job is not worth it. And trust me, there have been times that I have felt like this and still went on, because by nature, I am not a quitter but sometimes you just have no choice but to throw in the towel.

Some major deal-breakers for me are usually money-related.

I.e., being underpaid and being paid with a bad check are huge deal-breakers and are usually cause for immediate severing of ties for me.

Also respect is huge to me. If a parent ever yells at me, especially in front of someone else, whether that is another adult or a child, they will never see me again. No way.

Finally, if I am being asked to do more than I was during our initial agreement, then don't expect to ever see me again.
Sure, I can always sit down and talk it out with you, but I have already seen your true character colors and I do not like to be in the company, no less the home of people who take advantage of others.

I know it is unprofessional to up and leave without proper notice, but respect is a two way street for me.

I had to give my notice recently because the older child is too difficult and I can't handle him. I just take care of his toddler brother now. I have been nannying for him for almost 2 years. They asked me to take care of the 4 y/o in the summer. It was a difficult choice because I love the little one! I just know the 4 y/o would make me unhappy.

The only job I ever quit because of unhappiness was for a MB who had 3 kids, one with special needs, and she focused all her time, attention, and love on the two typical children and ignored the third. It hurt my heart too much to stay with them, I couldn't keep feeling like I was the only person who cared for that sweet child.

For me the standard is:
Does the nanny that they want fail to match the nanny that I am to a dramatic degree?

I believe that if I am no the person you actually want, then you should keep looking for that person.

The differences might be a big difference all in one area, or a lot of small differences in a lot of areas.

So, for example, I would ideally be working with two or more kids, making $20 per hour, going on lots of outings, doing play-based learning, using positive discipline techniques, feeding the kids exclusively whole foods from scratch, doing only child-related housekeeping and having fairly predictable hours with only limited weekend hours.

I recently quit a job that was 2 kids, $17 per hour, only outings to one particular park in walking distance, flashcards and drills, inconsistent discipline, more proccessed foods than. I am comfortable with, parents' laundry included, and increasingly unpredictable hours.

Now you might say that I shouldn't have taken the job to begin with, but the reality is that most first time parents don't knkw what they want. I took $17 per hour thinking I would get raises or bonuses as time went on. Didn't happen.

They initially said they liked my history of going on fun outings wih kids, but once DC got to be a toddler, they decided they weren't comfortable with me driving the kids.

They didn't have any strong opinions on discipline or education until their kids were toddlers.

When I started with an infant, food was obviously not an issue.

Parent's laundry was a result of job creep (helped out a few times and it became expected).

My original hours were very predictable, but they kept asking for more and more flexibility.

We were close in all of these situations , but there were SO MANY differences between their ideal and my ideal that it was better for us both to look elsewhere.

I once had a new mother make ridiculous requests regarding newborn care. One day she told me she called the baby's doctor to ask him about what I was saying and doing. The mother proceeded to apologize to me for her nonsense, because the doctor told her she was wrong.

I mean, why hire a trained and experienced professional if you think they're going to do everything your way?

Save yourself the grief and get a newbie (and train her yourself).
You'll save a lot of money to!

For me the standard is:
Does the nanny that they want fail to match the nanny that I am to a dramatic degree?

I believe that if I am no the person you actually want, then you should keep looking for that person.

The differences might be a big difference all in one area, or a lot of small differences in a lot of areas.

So, for example, I would ideally be working with two or more kids, making $20 per hour, going on lots of outings, doing play-based learning, using positive discipline techniques, feeding the kids exclusively whole foods from scratch, doing only child-related housekeeping and having fairly predictable hours with only limited weekend hours.

I recently quit a job that was 2 kids, $17 per hour, only outings to one particular park in walking distance, flashcards and drills, inconsistent disci

I would (and have) left nanny jobs because of the parents - never the children. In one case the parents constantly asked that I do chores not related to childcare even though none were listed in my contract and in the second case I left because of parents asking me to change my schedule far too often.

If you need to ask, leave.
Life is too short.
Let them live and learn, or not.

Everything you mentioned above would hands down be reasons for me to quit: no respect from parents, not connecting with older kids, parents threatening you, bosses not paying you.

Other reasons I have left jobs in the past (mind you some of these were casual babysitting jobs, but everyone's limits are different I suppose and these are mine):
House was a mess and I felt uncomfortable working in it
Wasn't being paid enough and didn't really like the family
Felt my safety was in jeopardy/felt I couldn't handle the special needs of one of my charges
Parent was incredibly overbearing and demanding and our childrearing styles didn't mesh

I'm wondering what the tipping point is?
No respect? No connection with the kids? Something really major? For example them threatening you or not paying you?

If you are in a crapping job whY stay?
The kids? The pay?
Just curious where everyone's mind set is and I'm needing some guidance but I know MB uses this forum and my situation is too unique to post...