Saving money. Mom is self employed and I guess business fluxuates

Anonymous wrote:So I called her last night and it turns out they decided to hire a love in overseas nanny who won't arrive til September. She wants me on 2 days a week until then. Not sure if I can make it work. But we shall see. For the record they said they really liked me and I would have been offered the position had it still existed.

So they couldn't wait until March but could for sept? Or was it all about saving money?

So I called her last night and it turns out they decided to hire a love in overseas nanny who won't arrive til September. She wants me on 2 days a week until then. Not sure if I can make it work. But we shall see. For the record they said they really liked me and I would have been offered the position had it still existed.

You asked for advice and she's going to provide it in a polite way, by phone. I think you're getting ahead if yourself in thinking she's offering you a job.

MB here. I think it's great that you asked for feedback. I could see at least two likely possibilities given her response:

- she wants to give you helpful feedback but it will actually be easier for her to do by phone, rather than writing it out in an email.
- the nanny they chose isn't feeling like a great fit to them and she is considering whether or not they could wait until March for you (using the part time option you offered until then)

I think you should talk to her. No harm is likely to come of it and at worst you might learn something about how you're perceived in an interview. At best the job might still be an option.

I wouldn't get too concerned about being their second choice. The simple fact of your limited availability will make you less desirable to a family who needs care sooner than you can be available. So you shouldn't take that personally. They might have loved you but just can't imagine how they would get through the next two months. That could push their second choice person into first place immediately if the other candidate is available now. If they liked you enough to still be wondering whether they should have tried to find a way to wait for you, then that's a big positive.

This mom might very well be questioning her decision, but also facing a tough few weeks until you're available. So it is probably less about you personally, than about the logistics.

Don't overthink it - just talk to her.

Anonymous wrote:But why would she do it if she didn't want to? I was really more so replying to be polite. I did not demand a reply and I defiantly don't really want to hear it over the phone

Asking for specific suggestions and asking the questions you did certainly implies you'd like a response. Perhaps it W's 1 or 2 big things and she is trying to be nice and let you know so that in the future you can get employment. Especially if she liked you. Maybe is fearful of our sue happy ways now she doesn't want the paper trail of an email, since sometimes wording can be misinterpreted.

But why would she do it if she didn't want to? I was really more so replying to be polite. I did not demand a reply and I defiantly don't really want to hear it over the phone

Sorry to be negative but I wouldn't get my hopes up. Employers usually don't notify candidates about their decision until they have a firm commitment from the person they intend to hire in order to avoid the hurt feelings the pp experienced. She may want to talk to you over the phone because telling a candidate why he/she didn't get a job can be awkward and email may not be the best medium for this. The delay in the response may just be due to the fact that this is a conversation she is not very excited about having.

This is a job, not a marriage proposal. Who cares if you are their first choice or not? The decision is based on limited information, and could include things like a lower rate, an impression that the person will stick around longer, etc. It is not a measure of your worth.

I found out accidentally that I was my employer's second choice. It was an ego blow, and I even considered quitting, but I realized that I have a job I love, and great employers. That other nanny turned them down for whatever reason, and we are a great fit. I know they are more than happy with their choice today (almost 3 years later). If this is a job you want, and you think you'd be a good fit, don't let your ego get in the way of taking it. Just show them why you should've been number one! Good luck!

I had an interview last week. Things went well but the only thing is the family was looking for an immediate atart and I was only available mid March. I let her know I could do 2 days a week. Everything seemed good but I could tell they wanted something right away. I got the email on Sunday saying they found someone. I said I was happy that they found the right fit. I asked if she had any suggestions of this I could have brought or said that would have made me a more attractive candidate or if my rate was too high?
Never heard from her Until today. She emailed me and asked me go call her when I have a few mins.

I'm not sure if this is to offer me the job or to tell me what I could do better over the phone which would be strange. I don't know... I don't think I would want to be second choice....

Any perspective would be helpful.