I don't open cards or gifts in front of the giver, unless they want me to (my mum's ways I guess), and then I thank them. All my former bosses know I was appreciative of any gifts...heck, I was always, giving their kids stuff.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are a troll. But, hey, let's play.

If she earned her bonus, why would she thank you? You aren't doing her a favor, you are compensating her for a job well done.

Ugh, if you're a nanny, you really make us look bad. Just stfu because that is some crap.

I'm an MB. I don't expect a thank you note (though they are nice when received) but I think a clearly stated thank you is in order for a significant cash bonus.

I would be annoyed also OP. I also think having "no chemistry at all" with my nanny would be a pretty significant concern for me, so the lack of a thank you would just be one more point of concern.

Don't ignore your gut instincts or discount the importance of your working relationship with a nanny.

I'm sorry she wasn't more appreciative - I think you were more than generous with the bonus.

Anonymous wrote:Not everyone is taught to thank the same way. I was in my mid 20's before I knew to open a gift in front of the giver. And I was taught if you do that and say thank you verbally, you dont have to write a thank you note. Not everyone grows up with the same rules.

Let it go.

This is what I was taught as well. My employers gave me my gift, and my bonus in my Christmas card, at the same time I handed them their gifts. I opened the gift and card and said thank you. I sure hope they aren't fuming because I haven't given them a thank you note! I don't normally write thank you notes for mutual gift giving occasions either. MBs do you expect a thank you note?

I did the exact same thing with my bosses. I said thank you when they gave it to me.

And to the nanny who thinks no thank you is needed because it was deserved - you have got to be kidding. That is the case at a company that pays on commission sure. But not otherwise and certainly not when it is coming directly from a family's budget vs a company's balance sheet.

I agree it is really annoying. That happened to us for several years too. We kept giving her a bonus because we knew she deserved it but it comes out to about double the most we spend for any family member. This year we have more than normal (by a lot) and finally got a thank you.

A note is not necessary - a text or email or verbal appreciation next time she comes in are all good in my view.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are a troll. But, hey, let's play.

If she earned her bonus, why would she thank you? You aren't doing her a favor, you are compensating her for a job well done.

youthink you're so much smarter than everyone else. Do tell, what makes this person a troll? what makes her obligated to give a bonus? The nanny's compensation for a job well done is her paycheck and continued employment. A bonus it's just that... a bonus (extra.)The nanny should have written thank you note right away.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are a troll. But, hey, let's play.

If she earned her bonus, why would she thank you? You aren't doing her a favor, you are compensating her for a job well done.

A bonus isn't a given you entitled, unprofessional wench!

It's because she thinks she's entitled to that bonus. Next year give her half a weeks pay and I'm sure you'll get more of a reaction from her (a neg reaction but a reacton nonetheless.)

I think you are a troll. But, hey, let's play.

If she earned her bonus, why would she thank you? You aren't doing her a favor, you are compensating her for a job well done.

Not everyone is taught to thank the same way. I was in my mid 20's before I knew to open a gift in front of the giver. And I was taught if you do that and say thank you verbally, you dont have to write a thank you note. Not everyone grows up with the same rules.

Let it go.

Perhaps she thought thanking you for the gift when you gave it to her was adequate? I confess I haven't written any of my thank you cards yet and have only verbally thanked DB because that's who I see most often (and who I saw the day I received my bonus) but I AM writing them (tonight, I swear!) and AM extremely grateful. I would let this go if I were you; not everyone handles gift giving and receiving the same way/well, but you can rest assured she's very thankful for your generous gift.

Forget it. Manners are something taught and seen by example. Not everyone has them. A simple email would have been nice.

and she has only worked with us for half the year. She even called us that night and left both me and my husband a VM- reminding us of something she forgot to do, but no thank you. I did get a soft thank you when I gave her a bonus envelope (but she didn't open it).

I'm a little upset. Not that I care if she gushes over the amount of the bonus, but we really dug deep into our pockets and wanted to give her a generous gift. would you feel the same?

I don't love her. but she is good with my son and so am not rushing to replace her. I just have no chemistry at all with her.