Anonymous wrote:Just think: if you had older teenagers left without a car (when they usually had one), I'm sure they'd be whining, too. It's what they do. Host families hire teenage APs to "be part of the family." Welcome to parenting a teenager!

Exactly!! I'd like to know what these moms are doing to prevent their own kids from becoming bitchy entitled teenagers and adults.

Just think: if you had older teenagers left without a car (when they usually had one), I'm sure they'd be whining, too. It's what they do. Host families hire teenage APs to "be part of the family." Welcome to parenting a teenager!

That would be difficult to deal with. My car has broken down or had to go into the shop and I have to rearrange as well, it's tough. But you have to learn to roll with things like that and so does she. If she had plans with the kids that day that necessitated a car, I might have tried to rearrange if possible (but I have no other way to get myself to work so I'm not sure how), but sometimes these things happen!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but no matter because she has to put up with your bitching. Obviously, you do not keep the third car in good condition or it wouldn't have broken down.

Yeah, because well-maintained cars never ever break down. OP, you will probably just have to learn to ignore it. My au pair says stuff like this. It drives me crazy, but I try to just let it go. "Yup, cars break down and it stinks when it happens. Guess you'll have to find other things to do today." And then mentally move on.

Good advice

Anonymous wrote:You could have had her drive you to work and let her use your car for the day.
And maybe she had plans or had errands to run and instead, she's stuck at the house all day. That does stink.
Compassion would go along way here.

I'm not sure if compassion is the right word, but maybe consider being less defensive. I'm saying this because this is what I've had to do. Our au pair sometimes says things about other families. Like a friend of hers works for a divorced family and she only works every other week. Our au pair was commenting on how lucky the au pair was that she only had to work half the time. In my head I'm going through all the things we do for her plus the fact that we're paying her to work and give her lots of random time off ourselves and getting more and more irritated. But I step back - she's just stating a fact. Yes, I too would like to only work half the time. Wouldn't we all. Maybe she doesn't mean anything by it - maybe she was just upset because she had plans that day and it came out as a complaint against what your family offers her but it was really just a general complaint about an annoying thing that happens in life.

You could always try "If this keeps up we'll just have to get rid of the third car and you can share my car at night, IF I don't need it." Maybe that would shut her up!

You could have had her drive you to work and let her use your car for the day.
And maybe she had plans or had errands to run and instead, she's stuck at the house all day. That does stink.
Compassion would go along way here.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, but no matter because she has to put up with your bitching. Obviously, you do not keep the third car in good condition or it wouldn't have broken down.

Yeah, because well-maintained cars never ever break down. OP, you will probably just have to learn to ignore it. My au pair says stuff like this. It drives me crazy, but I try to just let it go. "Yup, cars break down and it stinks when it happens. Guess you'll have to find other things to do today." And then mentally move on.

Yes, but no matter because she has to put up with your bitching. Obviously, you do not keep the third car in good condition or it wouldn't have broken down.

I live in the outer suburbs so a car is needed, we have 3 cars, one is for the au pair (no sidewalks, no public transportation). Yes it's an older car with over 100K, but a make/model that is good for 200K. Today the car won't start. My kids do have day camp, and a neighbor took them. But the AP had the gall to whine, "what am I going to do today without a car?" I'm just annoyed because I think my AP has the easiest gig; her own car, her own room w/bathroom, cellphone while watching older kids with daycamps or away at sleep away camp. Oh, I can't stand the whining. I'm sure it's a teenager/young adult thing. But it is constant. Just a vent. I don't correct the AP on the whining (where I do correct my kids on it).