OP, I am curious...How old is your nanny?

The reason I am asking this is because as a mother, I see this type of behavior w/younger nannies...the ones still in their early 20's. They seem to have self-entitlement issues that their older more mature counterparts do not seem to have.

I prefer hiring nannies 30 + since they seem more responsible and considerate.
Younger nannies feel the world revolves around them it seems.

Anyway, your nanny is being inconsiderate and I would let her know in no uncertain terms that she is not honoring the contract. This will leave you scrambling for back-up care and is a hardship for your family.

Depending on how much your kids love her, you can either let it slide this time and have her promise not to do this again or you can look for someone new right now.
I suggest an older nanny.

Anonymous wrote:Tell her that you can accommodate 2 weeks but not 3, and let her decide how to deal with that information.

+1. And what does the other family in the share think about this situation?

Tell her that you can accommodate 2 weeks but not 3, and let her decide how to deal with that information.

"I'm an MB. I think it's pretty inexcusable that she booked a trip for a full week longer than you had discussed without checking with you first. I would be very direct with her about how I felt about that and see how she responds. You were considerate about altering the terms of your contract for her benefit and she demonstrated zero consideration for you in return. "

agree. I doubt if I would fire over it but I would make it 100% clear I was pissed and that it would not be tolerated again. It is a big deal since not all families like to use paid care for gaps in nanny coverage. We try to take vacation time ourselves and use family/friends to cover rather than a total stranger. So I would be really unhappy with having to cover that much time since it's impossible to do so w/o paid help.

I'm an MB. I think it's pretty inexcusable that she booked a trip for a full week longer than you had discussed without checking with you first. I would be very direct with her about how I felt about that and see how she responds. You were considerate about altering the terms of your contract for her benefit and she demonstrated zero consideration for you in return.

If you decided this was grounds for termination I could understand that. If you decided to work around it then obviously the additional time would be leave without pay and that needs to be made clear.

No matter what you decide, or how you handle it, I think it's likely that this will pretty seriously damage the nanny/employer relationship. Even if I worked around this, was understanding about the additional time, etc... I would always feel that the nanny behaved unprofessionally and my trust in her would be damaged.

I'm not sure I could get past it. I would probably plan to replace her. I wouldn't do it while she's on vacation but I would probably do it a couple of weeks before she went (planning to pay her some severance etc...). For my own conscience I'd want to give her some time to line up interviews, fill-in work w/ an agency, etc...

I think I'd line up her replacement w/ a plan to have him/her start two weeks (at least) before the nanny's scheduled vacation. Then 2 weeks before the nanny's vacation I'd give her notice, plus generous severance (if you can afford it, at least in compliance w/ your contract) and have the new nanny start immediately.

Bummer.

OP, just get a new nanny. Can't you do that?

Anonymous wrote:If you would like to keep her, remind her that she agreed to take only one week of her choosing and therefore, she will be paid for only one week of the three week vacation.

Don't do this OP. Your post says you already agreed to let her take the second paid week consecutively with the first.

A lot of nannies--especially younger ones and those who come from countries where typical vacation policies are more generous--seem to think that a contract saying they get two weeks paid vacation leaves them with a unilateral option to take additional weeks without pay. Anyone who has worked in a salaried job knows this isn't the case, but many nannies of these nannies haven't. For this reason, it is a good idea to say in the contract that nanny is expected to limit her annual leave to the PTO outlined in the contract and/or that additional, unpaid leave will be granted only in exceptional circumstances and upon advance request to the parents.

You did nothing wrong. Her assumption that she could take additional unpaid time off is not reasonable. However, she may have no idea that she did anything wrong or unexpected. If you are otherwise happy with her and want to make the situation work, tell her now that you will either accommodate her plans this time but not again (and clarify your policy in writing), or that you just can't accommodate three consecutive weeks and she needs to change her plans to limit vacation time as per her contract.

If you go the latter route, just be prepared for the possibility that she says no and starts looking for another job.

If you would like to keep her, remind her that she agreed to take only one week of her choosing and therefore, she will be paid for only one week of the three week vacation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would ask why she booked tickets for three weeks when she only gets two weeks vacation and only one of those weeks is at her discretion per the contract she signed. I'd ask her to leave her key for my house with me, so I could give it to whoever I'd be having cover her hours. Then I would find a new nanny and fire her, probably while she's on vacation.

I'm a nanny and I agree with this. Though if you go this route, man up and tell her so she can decideif that trip is worth losing her job over.

Nope.. She already decided by BOOKING HER TICKETS. If she hadn't decided she'd have come to the OP and said, "I'd really like to go on vacation for three weeks in August. Is there ANY way we could make that work despite what my contract says?"

Anonymous wrote:I would ask why she booked tickets for three weeks when she only gets two weeks vacation and only one of those weeks is at her discretion per the contract she signed. I'd ask her to leave her key for my house with me, so I could give it to whoever I'd be having cover her hours. Then I would find a new nanny and fire her, probably while she's on vacation.

I'm a nanny and I agree with this. Though if you go this route, man up and tell her so she can decideif that trip is worth losing her job over.

Anonymous wrote:I would ask why she booked tickets for three weeks when she only gets two weeks vacation and only one of those weeks is at her discretion per the contract she signed. I'd ask her to leave her key for my house with me, so I could give it to whoever I'd be having cover her hours. Then I would find a new nanny and fire her, probably while she's on vacation.

You're a b***h.

I would ask why she booked tickets for three weeks when she only gets two weeks vacation and only one of those weeks is at her discretion per the contract she signed. I'd ask her to leave her key for my house with me, so I could give it to whoever I'd be having cover her hours. Then I would find a new nanny and fire her, probably while she's on vacation.

She is takiing one week without being paid. This means you find backup care for this time or find other permanent child care. She has made her reservations and she is not going to change them. These are your only two choices so why the dilemma?

I am part of a nanny share and we have a standard contract with our nanny for two weeks vacation per year. The contract states that the nanny chooses one week and we choose the other. Our nanny informed us that she would like to take both weeks in August to go out of the country and we agreed. I have been asking her for the exact dates for over a month and she said that she is still working on booking tickets. Today, she told me that she booked a flight for three full weeks leaving in a month and a half. To be honest, I am feeling upset about this. She never ran this by us prior to making her trip.

We are very flexible with our nanny. We pay her for the full five days that the other family has her work, but usually only have her take care of our child for 3.5 days. We give all major holidays and intermittent days off if she needs them.

Not only is this one more week than specified in her contract, three weeks in a row with a relatively short notice is a significant burden for us. I am not sure how to handle this situation, so any advice would be appreciated.