I have always waited until mb/db asked for advice before giving my opinion on any parenting issues. I am a nanny hired by them to care for child and keep them safe, not to dictate how they are raised. It is ALWAYS the parents choice and I have no right to judge.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity OP, do your bosses practice "Attachment Parenting?" If so, then I would run run far away...to the hills!! Parents who practice this type of parenting are basically enabling their children to become spoiled brats.

Anyway, while crying it out can be painful at first, it always gets better later on.
If the parents are so ignorant that they don't let their baby fall asleep on their own, then it will be next to impossible to sleep train this child.

ALL children need to be taught at a young age that falling asleep is something that needs to be done on their own. Parents need to avoid strolling their child to sleep, massaging them to sleep and rocking them to sleep.

What a child needs to learn how to do is lie down in bed and fall asleep on their own.
Babies by nature will fight tooth and nail their sleep, but slumber eventually wins.

That's ridiculous! Let me guess, you don't have any children of your own.
I practiced attachment parenting with both my kids. The are both well adjusted, not particularly, bratty, teens who sleep just fine. As you rock a sweet baby to sleep remember that you can only snuggle and nurture them like this for such a short amount of time. They will not go off to college needing their back rubbed, trust me. So many nannies are so cruel about a little extra TLC. Training is for dogs, not people.

+1!! And I am a nanny!!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity OP, do your bosses practice "Attachment Parenting?" If so, then I would run run far away...to the hills!! Parents who practice this type of parenting are basically enabling their children to become spoiled brats.

Anyway, while crying it out can be painful at first, it always gets better later on.
If the parents are so ignorant that they don't let their baby fall asleep on their own, then it will be next to impossible to sleep train this child.

ALL children need to be taught at a young age that falling asleep is something that needs to be done on their own. Parents need to avoid strolling their child to sleep, massaging them to sleep and rocking them to sleep.

What a child needs to learn how to do is lie down in bed and fall asleep on their own.
Babies by nature will fight tooth and nail their sleep, but slumber eventually wins.

That's ridiculous! Let me guess, you don't have any children of your own.
I practiced attachment parenting with both my kids. The are both well adjusted, not particularly, bratty, teens who sleep just fine. As you rock a sweet baby to sleep remember that you can only snuggle and nurture them like this for such a short amount of time. They will not go off to college needing their back rubbed, trust me. So many nannies are so cruel about a little extra TLC. Training is for dogs, not people.

OP here.The parents are not practicing attachment parenting, she is just used to being nursed to sleep. I have no problems with the method we use to get her to sleep...the problems are coming when she startles herself awake and is yotally unable to get back to sleep. I love cuddling her but even that is no good when she is over tired. I am sure it will work its self out eventually. Thanks for the few helpful suggestions, it would be great if this forum could provide more useful advice than "quit" more often though.

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity OP, do your bosses practice "Attachment Parenting?" If so, then I would run run far away...to the hills!! Parents who practice this type of parenting are basically enabling their children to become spoiled brats.

Anyway, while crying it out can be painful at first, it always gets better later on.
If the parents are so ignorant that they don't let their baby fall asleep on their own, then it will be next to impossible to sleep train this child.

ALL children need to be taught at a young age that falling asleep is something that needs to be done on their own. Parents need to avoid strolling their child to sleep, massaging them to sleep and rocking them to sleep.

What a child needs to learn how to do is lie down in bed and fall asleep on their own.
Babies by nature will fight tooth and nail their sleep, but slumber eventually wins.

That's ridiculous! Let me guess, you don't have any children of your own.
I practiced attachment parenting with both my kids. The are both well adjusted, not particularly, bratty, teens who sleep just fine. As you rock a sweet baby to sleep remember that you can only snuggle and nurture them like this for such a short amount of time. They will not go off to college needing their back rubbed, trust me. So many nannies are so cruel about a little extra TLC. Training is for dogs, not people.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally understand. My charge was about 7 months when this was really a big issue. MB works from home in an upstairs office and exclusively breastfeeds. The baby has never had a bottle and will not take a pacifier. MB insisted on letting her fall asleep while feeding and transferring her to crib for naps. Problem was when she woke up too soon, she was completely unable to soothe herself and was very upset. MB believes in never letting a baby cry and instant reassurance at all times which was tough with a baby who was simply really tired. I had a sit down talk with MB and DB and brought my concerns to them as a nanny. I suggested that we always wake baby if she falls asleep while feeding. I then take her through our nap time ritual, get her lovie, turn down the lights, turn on her white noise, etc. I then put her down for her nap. It was about a week of hell but she is now a great happier at 9 months. I say you definitely have to be honest with MB and give your feedback. As a nanny, it is never our job to tell MB what is right, but suggestions and feedback are a good thing. They hired us as professionals for that feedback.
Good luck!

It's interesting that my view is completely opposite. What's the point of hiring a professional if you can't depend on her to tell you what's "right", at least in her opinion? What do you feel makes you a professional?

This is exactly the reason why parents need to carefully consider if they really want an "experienced professional nanny". Most parents have no clue what that means. Many of them would in fact much prefer a sitter who is there to be a warm body and follow simple daily instructions.

Parents who prefer not "train" a new person, will opt for the higher priced professional nanny who knows how to do her job. The wise parent will seek to learn how she does her job, and then see if it's a viable match, or not.

PP here, I definitely disagree with you. I have been a professional nanny for 15 years now, am premature infant care certified through a very reputable children's hospital, have been with 5 families in that time, all whom I have great relationships with to this day. I would definitely consider myself an experienced professional nanny. I would say my MB would also say the same.
I work for a fairly high power family, make a very competitive wage, have great benefits, and am highly respected by my MB and DB.. I do not know many parents who want a nanny to come in and tell them how to raise their child. As a nanny, I always offer suggestions and advice based on my experience and education in the child development field, create daily routine, create a safe and nurturing environment, etc. At the end of the day, as a nanny, the parents are still the parents and it is their say how things are done. There is NO right or wrong way to do things (within reason of safety of course) when it comes to raising a child. There are many styles and techniques and it is my job to be educated on them on as a professional nanny. I prefer to work with parents as opposed to just do my own thing and let the parents do theirs. That is one quality in a family that would be the best match for me. I am very lucky and have been a great fit with all of the families I have worked with.

This is the best description I've seen of my ideal nanny and how I'd hope he/she would approach their relationship/partnership w/ me (MB). You sound like a great, experienced, competent and confident nanny. This is the kind of person I can imagine commanding the $20+ jobs.

Thank you Defintiely how I feel. I love being a nanny and take my job seriously, but love having fun! I have been very lucky with great families to work with!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally understand. My charge was about 7 months when this was really a big issue. MB works from home in an upstairs office and exclusively breastfeeds. The baby has never had a bottle and will not take a pacifier. MB insisted on letting her fall asleep while feeding and transferring her to crib for naps. Problem was when she woke up too soon, she was completely unable to soothe herself and was very upset. MB believes in never letting a baby cry and instant reassurance at all times which was tough with a baby who was simply really tired. I had a sit down talk with MB and DB and brought my concerns to them as a nanny. I suggested that we always wake baby if she falls asleep while feeding. I then take her through our nap time ritual, get her lovie, turn down the lights, turn on her white noise, etc. I then put her down for her nap. It was about a week of hell but she is now a great happier at 9 months. I say you definitely have to be honest with MB and give your feedback. As a nanny, it is never our job to tell MB what is right, but suggestions and feedback are a good thing. They hired us as professionals for that feedback.
Good luck!

It's interesting that my view is completely opposite. What's the point of hiring a professional if you can't depend on her to tell you what's "right", at least in her opinion? What do you feel makes you a professional?

This is exactly the reason why parents need to carefully consider if they really want an "experienced professional nanny". Most parents have no clue what that means. Many of them would in fact much prefer a sitter who is there to be a warm body and follow simple daily instructions.

Parents who prefer not "train" a new person, will opt for the higher priced professional nanny who knows how to do her job. The wise parent will seek to learn how she does her job, and then see if it's a viable match, or not.

PP here, I definitely disagree with you. I have been a professional nanny for 15 years now, am premature infant care certified through a very reputable children's hospital, have been with 5 families in that time, all whom I have great relationships with to this day. I would definitely consider myself an experienced professional nanny. I would say my MB would also say the same.
I work for a fairly high power family, make a very competitive wage, have great benefits, and am highly respected by my MB and DB.. I do not know many parents who want a nanny to come in and tell them how to raise their child. As a nanny, I always offer suggestions and advice based on my experience and education in the child development field, create daily routine, create a safe and nurturing environment, etc. At the end of the day, as a nanny, the parents are still the parents and it is their say how things are done. There is NO right or wrong way to do things (within reason of safety of course) when it comes to raising a child. There are many styles and techniques and it is my job to be educated on them on as a professional nanny. I prefer to work with parents as opposed to just do my own thing and let the parents do theirs. That is one quality in a family that would be the best match for me. I am very lucky and have been a great fit with all of the families I have worked with.

This is the best description I've seen of my ideal nanny and how I'd hope he/she would approach their relationship/partnership w/ me (MB). You sound like a great, experienced, competent and confident nanny. This is the kind of person I can imagine commanding the $20+ jobs.

Anonymous wrote:Out of curiosity OP, do your bosses practice "Attachment Parenting?" If so, then I would run run far away...to the hills!! Parents who practice this type of parenting are basically enabling their children to become spoiled brats.

Anyway, while crying it out can be painful at first, it always gets better later on.
If the parents are so ignorant that they don't let their baby fall asleep on their own, then it will be next to impossible to sleep train this child.

ALL children need to be taught at a young age that falling asleep is something that needs to be done on their own. Parents need to avoid strolling their child to sleep, massaging them to sleep and rocking them to sleep.

What a child needs to learn how to do is lie down in bed and fall asleep on their own.
Babies by nature will fight tooth and nail their sleep, but slumber eventually wins.

With all due respect, many many parents (and nannies) are straying far away from the cry it out methods and closer to attachment parenting styles. We are somewhere in between but your post is completely your opinion and not fact. I believe whole heartedly in many of the principals of attachment parenting. I am a nanny and have created a great balance in our schedule and day and have never let the baby cry it out. She is a great sleeper and well adjusted. So no need to judge other's child raising philosophies. There are no RIGHT ways.

Out of curiosity OP, do your bosses practice "Attachment Parenting?" If so, then I would run run far away...to the hills!! Parents who practice this type of parenting are basically enabling their children to become spoiled brats.

Anyway, while crying it out can be painful at first, it always gets better later on.
If the parents are so ignorant that they don't let their baby fall asleep on their own, then it will be next to impossible to sleep train this child.

ALL children need to be taught at a young age that falling asleep is something that needs to be done on their own. Parents need to avoid strolling their child to sleep, massaging them to sleep and rocking them to sleep.

What a child needs to learn how to do is lie down in bed and fall asleep on their own.
Babies by nature will fight tooth and nail their sleep, but slumber eventually wins.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally understand. My charge was about 7 months when this was really a big issue. MB works from home in an upstairs office and exclusively breastfeeds. The baby has never had a bottle and will not take a pacifier. MB insisted on letting her fall asleep while feeding and transferring her to crib for naps. Problem was when she woke up too soon, she was completely unable to soothe herself and was very upset. MB believes in never letting a baby cry and instant reassurance at all times which was tough with a baby who was simply really tired. I had a sit down talk with MB and DB and brought my concerns to them as a nanny. I suggested that we always wake baby if she falls asleep while feeding. I then take her through our nap time ritual, get her lovie, turn down the lights, turn on her white noise, etc. I then put her down for her nap. It was about a week of hell but she is now a great happier at 9 months. I say you definitely have to be honest with MB and give your feedback. As a nanny, it is never our job to tell MB what is right, but suggestions and feedback are a good thing. They hired us as professionals for that feedback.
Good luck!

It's interesting that my view is completely opposite. What's the point of hiring a professional if you can't depend on her to tell you what's "right", at least in her opinion? What do you feel makes you a professional?

This is exactly the reason why parents need to carefully consider if they really want an "experienced professional nanny". Most parents have no clue what that means. Many of them would in fact much prefer a sitter who is there to be a warm body and follow simple daily instructions.

Parents who prefer not "train" a new person, will opt for the higher priced professional nanny who knows how to do her job. The wise parent will seek to learn how she does her job, and then see if it's a viable match, or not.

PP here, I definitely disagree with you. I have been a professional nanny for 15 years now, am premature infant care certified through a very reputable children's hospital, have been with 5 families in that time, all whom I have great relationships with to this day. I would definitely consider myself an experienced professional nanny. I would say my MB would also say the same.
I work for a fairly high power family, make a very competitive wage, have great benefits, and am highly respected by my MB and DB.. I do not know many parents who want a nanny to come in and tell them how to raise their child. As a nanny, I always offer suggestions and advice based on my experience and education in the child development field, create daily routine, create a safe and nurturing environment, etc. At the end of the day, as a nanny, the parents are still the parents and it is their say how things are done. There is NO right or wrong way to do things (within reason of safety of course) when it comes to raising a child. There are many styles and techniques and it is my job to be educated on them on as a professional nanny. I prefer to work with parents as opposed to just do my own thing and let the parents do theirs. That is one quality in a family that would be the best match for me. I am very lucky and have been a great fit with all of the families I have worked with.

Anonymous wrote:I totally understand. My charge was about 7 months when this was really a big issue. MB works from home in an upstairs office and exclusively breastfeeds. The baby has never had a bottle and will not take a pacifier. MB insisted on letting her fall asleep while feeding and transferring her to crib for naps. Problem was when she woke up too soon, she was completely unable to soothe herself and was very upset. MB believes in never letting a baby cry and instant reassurance at all times which was tough with a baby who was simply really tired. I had a sit down talk with MB and DB and brought my concerns to them as a nanny. I suggested that we always wake baby if she falls asleep while feeding. I then take her through our nap time ritual, get her lovie, turn down the lights, turn on her white noise, etc. I then put her down for her nap. It was about a week of hell but she is now a great happier at 9 months. I say you definitely have to be honest with MB and give your feedback. As a nanny, it is never our job to tell MB what is right, but suggestions and feedback are a good thing. They hired us as professionals for that feedback.
Good luck!

It's interesting that my view is completely opposite. What's the point of hiring a professional if you can't depend on her to tell you what's "right", at least in her opinion? What do you feel makes you a professional?

This is exactly the reason why parents need to carefully consider if they really want an "experienced professional nanny". Most parents have no clue what that means. Many of them would in fact much prefer a sitter who is there to be a warm body and follow simple daily instructions.

Parents who prefer not "train" a new person, will opt for the higher priced professional nanny who knows how to do her job. The wise parent will seek to learn how she does her job, and then see if it's a viable match, or not.

I would carefully consider if this is the right job for you.. I was with my dc since almost birth so I found ways to make it work and I was the only person that could put my charge down for an afternoon nap, when he was with his parents mb just didn't give him one. If you are willing to endure this for a couple more months then it will probably pass (he will probably grow out of it by 1 year) but if this is too much for you already I would look elsewhere. And if he doesn't grow out of it you could be stuck with a miserable charge.

Its been about 4 weeks. Usually, I would have a conversation similar to PP. I am used to working with first time parents and having my input be valued. This, however, is their 3rd child and I get the feeling they wouldn't be too receptive to new ideas. It's frustrating for me, but mostly I feel bad for baby, she is almost always tired.

My last mb was the same way... I cared for charge starting when he was 3 months old and needed to rock him to sleep with a bottle until he was almost exactly a year old. It took 45 minutes at the least to get him to sleep. I would do everything from singing to playing with his hair. If he was every fidgety or wiggly I would touch his nose and say "nose" and on with eyes, ears and mouth. He like that and it seemed to calm him down. How long have you been with family?

I totally understand. My charge was about 7 months when this was really a big issue. MB works from home in an upstairs office and exclusively breastfeeds. The baby has never had a bottle and will not take a pacifier. MB insisted on letting her fall asleep while feeding and transferring her to crib for naps. Problem was when she woke up too soon, she was completely unable to soothe herself and was very upset. MB believes in never letting a baby cry and instant reassurance at all times which was tough with a baby who was simply really tired. I had a sit down talk with MB and DB and brought my concerns to them as a nanny. I suggested that we always wake baby if she falls asleep while feeding. I then take her through our nap time ritual, get her lovie, turn down the lights, turn on her white noise, etc. I then put her down for her nap. It was about a week of hell but she is now a great happier at 9 months. I say you definitely have to be honest with MB and give your feedback. As a nanny, it is never our job to tell MB what is right, but suggestions and feedback are a good thing. They hired us as professionals for that feedback.
Good luck!

Here's the gist of it. Baby is almost 8 months old, exclusively breastfeed when I am not with her and will only fall asleep for naps if she is taking a bottle. If she wakes up, she is totally unable to self-soothe and get back to sleep. I pretty much have to try to feed her another oz. of milk and see if that will help. She also will not take a pacifier. SOOO, all of this is to say, naps are pretty horrendous, I have worked with newborns and infants for 10 years and have never encountered a baby so unable to soothe itself. Mom and Dad are not open to any type of CIO situation. Any suggestions/help would be amazing.