Anonymous wrote:Families like these tend to abuse one nanny after another. I can't imagine how those children will be in a few years. That's the real concern here. Everyone knows that the rich white boy shooters had inconsistant and/or unstabe caregivers early in their lives. It doesn't matter who's doing it, but it needs to be "consistant and stable".

Sometimes there are actually serious consequences to neglectful parenting. It's the roll of the dice, what will happen down the road. No one can predict the future with complete certainty.

They also yell at the children. A lot. And so many rules that I just feel sorry for the kids because they can't quit. I can and I will.

Families like these tend to abuse one nanny after another. I can't imagine how those children will be in a few years. That's the real concern here. Everyone knows that the rich white boy shooters had inconsistant and/or unstabe caregivers early in their lives. It doesn't matter who's doing it, but it needs to be "consistant and stable".

Sometimes there are actually serious consequences to neglectful parenting. It's the roll of the dice, what will happen down the road. No one can predict the future with complete certainty.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, thanks. Or these parents could go to jail, and put an end to their ways.

Go to jail for what exactly? Being an asshole is not a criminal offense. Depending on the state OP works in, overtime pay for live-in may not be mandatory.

Agreed. They're just assholes and I would not harm anyone's lives for treating me like crap. I'm not like them. I'm just looking for a healthy environment to work, I know there are great families out there, families that appreciate what I do. I just had no luck crossing path with them. Yet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, thanks. Or these parents could go to jail, and put an end to their ways.

Go to jail for what exactly? Being an asshole is not a criminal offense. Depending on the state OP works in, overtime pay for live-in may not be mandatory.

Depends on state employment laws. No state allows slavery. Not "allowed" to excuse herself from the dinner table until everyone is finished eating, while she had already finished her "working" hours at 5:30? What part of that slave treatment you think is legal, in ANY state?

Anonymous wrote:Sure, thanks. Or these parents could go to jail, and put an end to their ways.

Go to jail for what exactly? Being an asshole is not a criminal offense. Depending on the state OP works in, overtime pay for live-in may not be mandatory.

This is why I will never ever do a live-in position again. I understand that it works for some people but the position I was in was almost as bad as the OP's position. It is just so easy for them to take advantage of you.

Yes, I could find a new job and I'm working on it. It just sucks the process of find a new family that could be a match + packing and moving, we never know how the new family will turns out to be.

Sure, thanks. Or these parents could go to jail, and put an end to their ways.

Um, she could just find another job.

If you're in the DC area, I think you can get free weekend counseling at The Women's Center in Vienna, VA. They help lots of women who feel trapped in abusive relationships. If you need transportation, I think someone here would help with that. This family should not be abusing you like this. There are people to help you for free.

You are in a very abusive relationship. Often emotional abuse is more damaging than physical abuse.

Anonymous wrote:Are you paid hourly? Did they offer to pay for the weekend hours?

Yelling is not acceptable. It sounds like looking for a new position is best.

No, they pay me $450, it's a live in position. My weekends are off. I'm not complaining about this arrangement, it's good enough to me. But the way I've been treated here is bad, apparently I can't do things after working because they expect me to eat dinner with them every night, and I can't get up when I'm done eating, I must stay until the last one finishes eating. Some rules are just too much. :/

I am so sorry. This happens so much behind closed doors. Some people don't want to believe it because they can't see it. Thank you for sharing this experience.

Are you paid hourly? Did they offer to pay for the weekend hours?

Yelling is not acceptable. It sounds like looking for a new position is best.

Well, I started the new years with one goal: Be happy and find a family that will not take advantage of me. My previous job was okay, but I was working 12-13 hours a day, I stayed there for 2 years and decided to move on, since I did not have time for myself, I just think it's not worth spending my life working if I don't have time for a social life. So I found this job with regular hours (7:30 am - 5:30 pm) in a great community. The job is housecleaning and childcare, which I love doing... I've been live in the house for 4 weeks nos and the parents are showing their true colors, I work my butt off to clean the house (I do details) and keep everything in a way to please everyone, and apparently I have no right to sit for 5 minutes for a break to eat (they think I'm sitting around, even though the house is spotless, there's no appreciation), before the 4 kids come home for school. Yesterday, the entire family left for a weekend trip around 1 PM, so I assumed I'd be off too and left the house the buy myself some lunch and came straight back home, for my surprise, they had came back and were waiting for me to give me a list of things to do for the weekend (which I'm off!), and they started to yell at me because I left for 15 minutes, even if I leave the house I'm in trouble.

I'm not a quitter but if the "being part of the family" crap means to the family "you are our property" I'm out. Where are all the "normal" families that doesn't take advantage or treat the help like trash? I'm really hard worker and i don't think I deserve to be yelled at, I respect the family I work with and I believe they should treat me with the minimal respect too. I never heard of asking references about a family before we join to work with them, but it's the same concern when a family wants to check the nanny references.

Turns out I'm still unhappy, and I'm not sure what to do... if in 4 weeks they are already treating me like this, I don't want to know how would be in a year. I wonder why the last nanny quit.