AuPair go to date when they get time off. It's persona timel why the host family have to worry about that. You don't have to worry it's they own business. They are big girl and they know what they do. If they still work good with your child. It's enough. In they time off they can do anything. Every one need a date. AuPair is student exchange, come to the US for learn and work with host family. They have the choice. If they work good enough in during hours work. Just enough, don't have to worry anything. Let them have private time.

Young women from other countries are not interested in the opposite sex and don't engage in "dating." Close your eyes and keep telling yourselves that.

I think that it is very common, not because they are seeking to become US citizens, but because they are 20-something. When I was 20-something....dating was all I thought about!

I swear the ore i read I really think you think au pairs are all stupid!!!

Do you think living in ASIA, S.AMERICAN ETC its NOT DANGEROUS?

who ever livid in those places know pretty well how things work!

MY host family was the same way in the first week and I told them '' listen... I come from a BIG CITY from south america and I survived lololol do you think in AMERICA would be more dangerous? lmao

ahhahahha you must be kidding me right??

So they are here for at least a year and they CANT have fun? what a joke!

My ex just married an Colombian Au Pair. He met her Feb 2012 and married her 2 months later. They tried keeping it a secret from the host family so she could continue making money, but they found out and the company that brought her over fired her. His fam and friends don't know they are married. I only found out because he randomly wanted to see our son a lot more, but only if his g/f could tag along. I thought it was very inappropriate to expose his 2 yr old son to his string of g/f's. This was when he told me he had been married since the weekend of our son's b-day that he skipped out on. This is not just a rumor. It is a fact. A large number of girls come over and date to try and find someone who will marry them fast. Now I get to wait and see if she divorces him after she gets her green card. The ex is sort of a shmuck. I'd be really surprised if she would be willing to put up with him for longer than she has to. She didn't to my knowledge have the requirement of having to go back to her country for 2 years on her J1 visa. If your Au pair's visa doesn't have this designation I'd be very worried that she'll get married and you'll have to find a new au pair. But basically you're just helping a lot of young women come to the US to pimp themselves out for green cards.

15:55 here: While you're talking to your AP about dating, also please talk about watching their drinks and never ever letting them out of their sight while in bars. And not accepting a drink from a guy who is not the bartender serving it (and they watch it be made). There are just too many cases of date rape drugs being mixed in...and APs can sometimes be really easy "prey." I also talk to our APs about never splitting up from their friends....always staying together no matter what. If a guy is that great that she wants to spend time alone with him, he will be that great tomorrow when he calls for a proper date. They of course can do what they want when they are off, but I feel it is my responsibility to talk to them about things like this and just warn them.

My au pair has told me that she has heard other APs talk about findimg a man to marry and stay here. I do think it tends to be girls from Eastern Europe, parts of Asia and South America where the standard of living is very different.. I thinks it's much less common with European APs. Be sure, no matter where your AP is from, to tell her that she may NEVER invite a man to your home and must NEVER share your address or home phone number. I know an LCC who told me about an AP who met a guy on Craigslist and invited him over!!! Nobody was hurt but she just didn't realize how dangerous that was. This was a few years ago. Maybe girls are more Internet savvy now? I hope so, but still.

I have heard a few stories about Asian au pairs (specifically Thai and Vietnamese au pairs) who were pretty single-minded about finding a man to marry and stay here in US. This included going on match.com, etc, and some pretty scary behaviour (including having a man met through match.com over to the family home without permission).

My 1st AP (German) had a serious boyfriend back home. She didn't extend because she wanted to get back to him. They actually made through the whole year. Haven't heard of German APs with more than very casual dating experiences here.

We've had two Germans. Both have had boyfriends from home. The first broke up with hers a few minths in and sort of let a guy or two toward the end but not purposefully. This one seems casual with the home boyfriend but isn't looking for male friends at all. The german APs I know seem to have lots to go back to and seen to want to make good girl friends and generally have fun. That's my impression anyway.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how common it is for APs to date while local in the US. My AP has a local boyfriend and her two best friends are also dating. One joined match.com!

Are most APs looking to date while here? I know one of her friends is looking to stay in the country after her year...

Common or unusual?

Have you had a dating AP? What happened after they finished their year? Were they more anxious to extend? Or were they sad to go home?

Troll.

OP ...not a troll. HM to second AP. Both have been German.

First didn't date...just hung out with friends. Second one...like I said, has a boyfriend.

If they're single...very common.

Um, hello...getting married & becoming a US citizen is on a lot of their minds.

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how common it is for APs to date while local in the US. My AP has a local boyfriend and her two best friends are also dating. One joined match.com!

Are most APs looking to date while here? I know one of her friends is looking to stay in the country after her year...

Common or unusual?

Have you had a dating AP? What happened after they finished their year? Were they more anxious to extend? Or were they sad to go home?

Troll.

7 au pairs in, and no, none of our APs has gone on match.com or anything like that. Two dated very, very casually, but that was it. One had a boyfriend at home. The rest hung out with their au pair friends, went to bars and nightclubs, but didn't end up with a significant other. Our APs have been Brazilian and German. Of the Brazilians (4), one ended up staying and converting to an F1, getting her MA in special ed, and then eventually meeting someone and getting married 5 years after leaving us. She certainly didn't come to the US to meet someone at all - it was more about the opportunity to work and be independent that wasn't possible at home. For the other Brazilians, many of their friends stayed and got married (a few with teh intention of this) but ours didn't. They went home after their year or two (one was an extension when she came to us) and found great jobs that require them to use their English daily.

The Germans, all young (before college), have not shown any interest in dating at all. One came with a boyfriend from home (and returned to him - living with him at university now), but the others have just hung out with their AP friends and returned to university after one year.

From other HMs I know, it seems like there are some APs from some countries (according to them, some eastern European countries) who come to the US looking to meet someone and stay. But since we have never had an AP who wasn't from Brazil or Germany, I don't know whether this is accurate or just their personal impression.

I wonder how common it is for APs to date while local in the US. My AP has a local boyfriend and her two best friends are also dating. One joined match.com!

Are most APs looking to date while here? I know one of her friends is looking to stay in the country after her year...

Common or unusual?

Have you had a dating AP? What happened after they finished their year? Were they more anxious to extend? Or were they sad to go home?