Sorry, OP - I'd also have to say you should go back to the agency and rematch without hesitation. Not allowing you access without notice to a stove, no heat, and not allowed to be in the home unless you're working is outrageous. I agree that some live-ins would want a totally separate space and never have to see the family outside of work, but that's different than the situation you have explained. Even one of these anti-family live-ins would be unhappy with those three things I would think.

Good learning experience - for the next time, think about what kind of family you want to be a part of and make sure the family aligns with that. And a good family will happily show you and/or explain thoroughly the nanny living space and their general household rules. If they balk, they're not a good family.

I would talk to the agency and say that the job doesn't match the job description and you feel that it will not work out. I would also mention not being able to be in the house/ sitting room/ kitchen situation, as part of being a live in is having access to a kitchen!!! (basic human right much) as is heating.

I would also start looking for a new job in my spare time - just in case the agency screws you over. Please don't stay in this environment - it sounds really horrible! Families who don't want their nanny round heaps after hours tent to provide the nanny with separate accommodation; sitting/ tv room and kitchenette. It doesn't sound like this family are a good match for you since you want to be part of the family - even if you could fix your accommodation that wouldn't fix the mis-match between you and the family.

When you are interviewing for a new position, make sure you ask to see the space you will be living in. Most families will offer to show you as part of the interview but if they forget you can also bring it up "would it be ok for me to see the nannies living space?" Good luck and I hope you find a much better family to be a part of

I was matched with a family for a live-in situation. I was told that it would be "ideal" conditions but my quarters are a small suite over the renovated garage. It gets very cold at night, I don't think there's any insulation or heating as they supplied a plug in heater. I don't have a stove and only a hotplate, microwave, bar fridge, and minimal counter and cupboard space. It's very minimalistic and uncomfortable. There's no space to have a friend over. It's a bed, couch, and table crammed into a room with small bathroom shielded by a curtain.

The agency assured me that I would "part of the family".

This sounds like a bad match. With the exception of the heat issue, some nannies would prefer this set up over having a room with a separate exit and no expectation that any of her off hours would be spent with the family. You can't depend on an agency to make a good match for you anymore than a family can fully trust the agency has thoroughly checked references and made a good match for them. Agencies make money by matching quickly and since its more difficult for live in nannies/live in employers to replace a bad match, bad matches are less riskier for the agency.

In the future, you should make sure to ask enough questions during the interview to understand whether the position is a good match for you. This includes not just answering question but asking a few on your own. As a live in, its also pretty reasonable to ask for pictures as well as a description of the living quarters.

Quit.

Find a new bridge to live under?

I would talk to the agency that you work for and tell them your concerns. The most concerning thing is that you are in a uninsulated room in the winter. That would be enough to make me contact the agency ASAP. I work with two agencies and they both have clauses that if you are placed with a family and it isn't a good match, they will do their best to re-place you.

I was matched with a family for a live-in situation. I was told that it would be "ideal" conditions but my quarters are a small suite over the renovated garage. It gets very cold at night, I don't think there's any insulation or heating as they supplied a plug in heater. I don't have a stove and only a hotplate, microwave, bar fridge, and minimal counter and cupboard space. It's very minimalistic and uncomfortable. There's no space to have a friend over. It's a bed, couch, and table crammed into a room with small bathroom shielded by a curtain.

The agency assured me that I would "part of the family". However the family outlined a strict schedule and that I am only expected to be in their home during my work hours. I asked if I was allowed to watch T.V in their living room and they seemed uncomfortable and mentioned that they could put an extra one in my suite. If I have to speak with them I am asked to send an email, phone, or text message during off-work hours. I am not allowed to use their computer, t.v room, and have to ask for permission 4 hours in advance if I want to cook with their stove. My involvement during birthdays and holidays under the contract outlines that my role would be to provide relief childcare. I am not part of the family. I am just the help and they would prefer to not have anything to do with me other than provide childcare for them.

I am very disappointed. I need this job to send money to my family but I feel lonely and isolated. I was hoping that I would be allowed in the home during off-work hours but it's clear I would be unwelcome.

What to do?