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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I believe the saying goes 'Not all men. Yes all women'.

I've had plenty of wonderful male bosses who I hugged on occasion. I've also had male bosses who gave me the creeps and who I wouldn't have liked to be in the lift with on my own. The difference is that we as women have to be able to voice our displeasure when people, most exclusively men, treat our bodies as their personal playground. We're taught to believe that it is rude to say no and that an advance is a compliment and it is all harmless fun. It is not true. My body, my rules. You don't have to scream rape if you don't like the way a DB puts his hand around you, but you are completely in your right to state calmly that you don't like the way your boss is touching you and ask him to stop, thank you very much. It does not mean you hate all men. It means this particular man is not behaving the way he should.

We have to assert ourselves, and though we've been brainwashed into thinking we shouldn't because it makes us ungrateful rude shrews who can't take a compliment, it is in our hands to teach men that we are own people and deserve the same bodily autonomy and respect that their male friends, coworkers and employees get. /soapbox[/quote]

Hate to tell you though, just because you feel uncomfortable does not mean that someone else is doing anything wrong. If socially acceptable things make you uncomfortable you should see a psychologist. [/quote]

If you read OP's post you will see that what her DB was doing was definitely crossing the line and that is what was making her uncomfortable. But society taught her that she should suffer instead of potentially hurt this man's feelings, which is utter bs. Social norms are changing all the time. It would be nice if we could move from 'anyone has access to my body because I'm a woman' to 'no one has access to my body unless they have my permission' which is, oh wait, the way men are treated right now.

A good litmus test is asking yourself if something would be a thing that happens to men. I currently can't think of examples in Western culture where it is appropriate for one man to lead another man to the door with his hand on the small of the other one's back. Why should it be okay for a man to do to a woman then?[/quote]

You people really don't see how idiotic you sound? Access to your body???? This guy was not getting off sexual by being nice sending her out the door. Remember the thread posted around the same time as this one with the nanny who said sometimes DB hugged her and that she didn't mind but one time she thinks he might have touched her bra strap?!?! The horror! RAPE!

Men sometimes lead males guests to the door with their hands on their upper backs, but of course if you did this to a woman you might touch their bra strap which we just learned is akin to rape, so honestly I don't see the issue with using the lower back.

When I started with my current family MB gave me a hug, it was a little unexpected and made me slightly (ever so slightly) uncomfortable, should I scream and say YOU DON'T HAVE ACCESS TO MY BODY!!!? I mean I should never ever have to be uncomfortable right? Clearly she did it to hold some sexual power over me and humiliate me.

This is what you sound like.

The funny thing is the women most likely to get loud about being assaulted and targeted are the ones LEAST likely to ever be in a situation related to sexual assault. Chunky women, ugly women, they are always the loudest about this shit.[/quote]

I was going to reply to this but your ending paragraph of ignorant victim blaming really dissuaded me of that notion. One of my New Year resolutions was to not engage with the stupid.

In the meantime I suggest you go onto the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network website and learn that:
- 1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed rape; 2.8% attempted rape).
- 17.7 million American women have been victims of attempted or completed rape.
- 9 of every 10 rape victims were female in 2003.
And that looks, weight, disability, ethnicity play an inconsequential role.

And just in case you wanted to, idk, read the original post, you will see that neither the OP, nor I spoke of rape.

Hope you're never put in uncomfortable position by a man or experience any concern for your sanity and safety through men. [/quote]

I've been in uncomfortable situations with men on a few occasional, and because of that I hold the view I do. I'm tired of seeing women go crazy over simple and innocent things. You don't realize this is why women have trouble getting hired? It not because men are trying to keep us down, it's because women are the ones that go to HR over a funny joke.

It's women that will tell a male coworker that he has a really nice tie/sweater/etc and say the same thing to female coworkers, but God forbid that that male coworker say she has a nice blouse, cool skirt, or neat haircut and suddenly it's another trip to HR.

This post is exactly why women aren't taken seriously and your crazy behavior effects me as a woman. If I wasn't nannying I would have to go out of my way to prove I am different than you, that I can hang with the guys, and do my work just as good as a guy without crazy tiptoeing around me. [/quote]

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