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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have never had to quit and we always ended things on a good note. My new position is not working out for me. I have been with them for two months. MB is generally always late even though she works 8 blocks from her home. I have done many duties outside of what was expected and MB has just stopped being appreciative of it. The reason why I am quitting is I came down with a bad flu bug last week. I missed 3 days. That Friday MB and DB told me they were worried I was not interested in continuing to work for them because I missed days. They basically accused me of lying that I was sick just so I didn't have to go into work. They went on and on about how they are worried I missed those days because I don't like them. I am beyond upset because they basically called me a liar. It was going pretty good besides MB being late but I have been livid. I plan to quit this Friday but I don't know he or what to say. I just can't work in a position where my bosses think I'm a liar and not into the position. I never gave that indication and for them to say it must be them is BS. I stay at least 15-20 minutes talking with MB about random things. Now I feel very uncomfortable and don't want to stay. Help me learn how to quit. [/quote] Hmmm... hard to say without being there, but they sound like first time parents and first time employers, is that right? This might be salvageable. The conversation they had with you leads me to think they're feeling insecure about themselves as employers- like they think they've done something wrong that lead you to lose interest- now, you say you would not do that and I believe you, but this is still a new position/relationship, so they don''t necessarily feel confident of that fact quite yet, especially if they're feeling unsure of themselves. Not saying they went about it right, but it might be a miscommunication- but you're the only one who was there, so feel free to correct me :) As far as her being habitually late (if you feel the other issue can be conquered), you should sit down with them and discuss how everything has gone so far. Suggest that they extend your hours (and your pay!) so that there is ample time for her to get home and you to inform her of the day's happenings without infringing on your evening. Also, STOP doing things that are not part of your job. That's just asking for burnout. Good luck in whatever you decide! [/quote] Hhhmmmm.... I don't think this is salvageable, and here is why. MB and DB engaged in a subtle but distinctive form of intimidation. This behavior is the Siamese twin of manipulation. And this type of personality disorder has an unrelenting sense of entitlement--so appreciation is not something you'll get. And if I'm correct, the appreciation was merely a facade, and they are unable to sustain their fake mimicry of emotions common to a normal person. Not a healthy relationship value, at all! They went overblown about a legitimate reason to take off. Yet MB has no problem in routinely getting home late from her job 8 minutes away? Plus no problem with job creep duties? Notice that they shifted from claiming to be "worried you're not interested in continuing to work for them because you missed those days" (i.e., thinly veiled termination threat)..........to claiming they were "worried you missed those days because you don't like them." (i.e., emotional blackmail/guilt trip). Your feelings of discomfort over their thinly veiled attacks are the reaction of normal people's reactions to the manipulator's tactics. The manipulators are testing and grooming you for further abuses along these lines. If you stay tgey will have you in twisted mental/emotional mess & wondering what hit you. Don't fail the test with flying colors! Step away from the madness. Get a new position, ASAP. That being said..... I encourage you, do not quit short notice, or before you have a new job. Be professional, regardless of whether they are/aren't. In the meantime, if you should become ill before separating from them, I offer these suggestions: Text--not talk to--them a follow up on this past illness situation: "To assure you that I do not take my professional obligations to you lightly, should I again become ill while in your employee, I will text you to let you know I am sick and need to stay home, as I do not desire to get DC/them sick. Please text me your thoughts. If they reply in a way to try to guilt/coerce/threaten you to come in, send back a plain question, "Am I to understand that you still want me to report for work today?" If they send back with some sort of fuzzy answer, send back, "Is that a Yes? " If it's in your contract/handbook that you provide them a medical slip, do so as it outlines. But keep copies of everything, texts, medical slips, etc.[/quote]
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