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[quote=Anonymous]OP, listen to what the people here already told you.  I know you have a good heart and don't want to hurt an old lady. However, I think, based on what you told us here, that the nanny no longer fits the needs of your family.   I don't think your relationship has a professional dynamic to it, and that's the core of the problem. Considering she's not American, she may think of herself as a grandma type doing you a favor rather than an employee. That happens.

On the cleaning: it's customary that nannies do the cleaning related to the child - the children's laundry, tidy up the messes, put the toys away. I don't know about cleaning the children's rooms, but the laundry is solidly part of her duties.

You have to decide if reinforcing your native language is worth the hassle.  I think you mentioned your languages are Russian/Bulgarian - that sort of thing?  Maryland has a booming Russian community and I am sure there are women there looking for nanny work.  There are also numerous Russian preschools and daycares, and they might have some contacts as well.

Your nanny's pay is not super competitive, but neither is your nanny's skill set.  She doesn't drive (DING!) and doesn't speak English (DING!)  Quite frankly, her appeal as a caregiver is limited to a very small set of people for an excellent reason - that she lacks basic skills people want in a nanny.  Frankly, I would find it a big hassle to drive someone to metro and back every day.

Finally, the nanny is supposed to relieve your stress, not add to it.  When they begin to do the former, it's time to say goodbye, because while we all have stress in our lives, paying for the privilege of someone stressing you out simply doesn't make sense.[/quote]

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