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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There's just something distasteful about a woman hiring me to love and care for her kids because she thinks I am the best available substitute for her, then asking me to have someone else care for my kids.

I think your perspective is wrong, and I think it's indicative of the great class divide in America as well as the culture we have created where mothers, in the role of mothering, are undervalued. Our lack of maternity leave, lack of affordable childcare options, this ongoing burden of shame we try to heap on mothers whether they work or stay at home, use daycare or hire a nanny, are all features of this problem. And you are contributing to it with your assessment that it is unreasonable of a nanny - whose JOB and SKILLS are directly correlated with being a parent - to want to bring her children with her.

It is understandable that you would choose not to hire someone with their own kids, certainly, but it breaks my heart to think you'd let go a beloved nanny if she gave birth to her own child (unless she found alternative care). It's disgusting, frankly.[/quote]
You have a soapbox, clearly, but you know, I was just walking by, I'm not a cause of your problems.

Certainly, it is very sad that our maternity leave is so short, but it is not related to the issue at hand.

Also, I never mentioned that it's unreasonable for a nanny to want to bring her children with her. Certainly she is entitled to want that.  Should she find an employer who's willing, she will likely make less money than she would solo.  That is also completely understandable because half a nanny is worth less than a full nanny.  If I wanted to work for someone else during my work day, my employer would have, legitimately, an issue with that because they'd be getting half of my time vs. all of my time.  Again, that's a completely different from the issue at hand - that is, whether it is sad that nannies have to leave their own children in daycare while they care for someone else's child.  [b]Why aren't you sad for all the lawyer moms who have to leave their kids in care of someone else?[[/b]/quote]

As far as the argument we are making, the true analogy would be the lawyer mom who is not allowed to defend her child in court because she gets paid more to defend someone else's, and she must see her child get stuck with a public defender. So no this doesn't make me sad, because it doesn't happen. The lawyer moms who leave their kids typically do so with either a very qualified nanny, or the best daycares money can buy. So no her kids are not getting short changed the way a nanny's almost certainly are, as for a nanny to make a profit she has to send her kids to a cheaper option than herself. [/quote]

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