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[quote=Anonymous]First of all, I'm really sorry the family did that to you. That was not okay, and I understand your frustration towards them.

That being said, I'm a DC parent who has had nannies in the past, and is about to enter a contract with a new nanny, and I have some advice for you.

Unfortunately for you, this is the season when there are more nannies than families. While families are looking for new nannies year round as new babies are born or families move to the area, most people are saying goodbye to beloved nannies as school starts when their youngest goes off to school.

Especially given that timing, $35 is a very high starting salary. Remember that a good family will want to give you a $1-2 raise every year, so you're generally not going to make as much at the beginning of an engagement with a family as you do toward the end (assuming you're usually a longer term nanny, 3+ years with a family). Our new nanny is going to be getting $32 per hour and that's for a nanny share. No, you shouldn't accept $20 an hour, that's absurd, but $28-$32 is a reasonable starting salary in this area. If a family you feel you're clicking with, and who is looking for a longer term arrangement, is offering $25, see if you can negotiate up to $28. That's a heck of a lot better than going months without a job! You can bemoan the fairness of that, but it seems you're finding that's what the market can bear.

Now, I'm not sure what's going on with your current family. Maybe they did like you and just would rather their kid be in daycare for whatever reason, maybe they've been unhappy with you all along and just didn't say anything (which sucks) or maybe they just really weren't okay with you falling asleep. I understand why you're angry with them, but you need to make nice with them for absolutely selfish reasons. [b][u]Getting a job without the ringing endorsement and strong recommendation from your most recent family will be WAY harder and in some cases nearly impossible. [/u][/b] If you don't have that - it's going to be very, very hard to get a job, and you'll need to lower your starting salary even more. I would not, under any circumstances, hire a nanny with a tepid recommendation from their current employer. Would not do it. And I'm sure I'm not the only one out there. This is crucial.

The best way to get a job is to have your current employer make posts for you. We have gotten all our nannies from posts on neighborhood listservs from other parents saying "we have this amazing nanny who we love and adore but we're moving/kid is going to school. You'd be so lucky to get her!" and that include lots of information (from the parent's perspective) about why their nanny is great. Ask your current family if they'd be willing to do that for you. [/quote]

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