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Reply to "I’d give our nanny a solid “C”, but she thinks she’s the best ever"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We’ve had our nanny for a little over a year, and there are things she’s good at and things she’s awful at. The good is that she’s punctual and reliable, and energetic with our kids. She takes care of our youngest while our older two are in school, and in the afternoon we share childcare duties (ie, I take kids to one activity, her to another) such that 75% of the time she’s not with all three. The bad is that she never plans activities for them - ever - and rejects my suggestions for things to do, so they ALWAYS hang out at home. She also doesn’t feed them very nutritiously despite my asking her to make sure snacks are a balance of fruit, carb, protein (like cheese or yogurt) and to only do raw veggies before dinner. They are instead constantly running around with pirates booty and chips, which yes we buy but we don’t let them eat all day. She also doesn’t clean up after the kids as thoroughly as she should, despite our asking (she’ll typically clean up the last thing they played with but not what they’ve used all day, in another room for example). Finally and most upset tingly, when one is upset or cries she’s pretty cold and chooses to ignore ALL emotions. Anyway mostly the kids love her so we’ve been trying to ask her to work on these things and weren’t going to make a change. But increasingly she’s been dropping hints that she’s worth more than we’re paying (30/hour, 2 weeks vacation, 1 week sick leave, plus health insurance) and says things that suggests she knows how to parent better than I do. She’s young and this was her first full time nannying job. Her attitude is pushing me over the line, more than her work. She just acts so… entitled. DH thinks it’s a generational thing and that people in their 20s are like this now. Thoughts?[/quote] Unfortunately you need a new nanny. There’s a chance she won’t take criticism well and if you confront her your kids will pay for it somehow. Find one and pay her out the severance but don’t have her come back. I’ve never met anything other than a C nanny - it’s rare I come home and they haven’t had some weird sugar thing that’s been dug out of a cabinet, activities are never sensible, and the list goes on. Paying more won’t get you better. They don’t exist. I can afford to pay more but stick to $28 for two kids because at least I’m not wasting money on top of being frustrated. Frankly, I’ve noticed that the nannies claiming rates should be higher are specifically the most entitled. The more you pay above $28 the more entitled and less useful the nanny, it seems.[/quote] Speak for yourself. [/b] OK, I'll bite. [b] I choose my charge's activities. There's a reason I buy year passes for things I know we will use (exercise, aquarium, etc). I find low cost activities which are fun and educational ($5 Nature Center, free library activities which only require going to a different branch, etc). [b] I just want you to go to the very expensive classes I pay for. Why must you attempt to overrule me? I don't care whether you want to hang out with your nanny friends at cheap-o activities, I want you to deal with soccer so I don't have to. [/b] I'm more conscious of nutrition than my employers are. I teach children to be aware of what they eat, slow down and savor flavors they enjoy, and combine things they don't like with things they do. [b]. What in the actual world? Other than your statement that you are better than your employers, you said nothing about nutrition. Also, are you talking to 7 year olds? Why are you nannying 7 year olds? Because my one year old DGAF; you kind of just need to go with trial and error and actually clean up after him when he's done rejecting stuff. [/b] I teach the children to clean up after themselves. By the time they are 5, they are doing it without any help beyond prompting, and they understand that they must clean up before starting their next activity. [b] I expect a child to be cleaning up before starting an activity by 4 at the latest. Are you trying to raise heathens? [/b] Ignoring a tantrum is spot on; ignoring a meltdown due to the adult ignoring fatigue, overstimulation, thirst or hunger is neglect and harmful to emotional development and control. Ignoring a child who is experiencing an emotion that they don't know how to name, let alone control, is abusive (IMO) and teaches them to repress their emotions. [/b] I don't disagree here, actually, minus calling it abusive. JFC. [b] Above is a dud, but there are plenty of good nannies out there.[/quote] [/b]. Yes, a ton! And for $20-$25.[/quote] Totally messed up what I was trying to do with the bold, haha - apologies![/quote]
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