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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She is not working for us at all but has continued to eat dinner with us the last week and then presented me with a grocery bill for her breakfast and lunch items for the past week (this was how we usually did the meals in our house since we are not home during the week for breakfasts or lunches as family).[/quote]

You used to reimburse her for breakfast and lunch items because you don't usually have breakfast and lunch as a family and hence don't have anything she could have for breakfast and lunch in your home? Or you just don't have a huge choice of breakfast and lunch items at home because the you don't have breakfast at home and the kids only have oatmeal (or whatever)?

a) This should have been discussed when you agreed to let her stay.
b) If this is how you have handled it the last 51 weeks I see where she is coming from.
c) If it's a matter of "we don't have cereal/granola/toast/lunchmeat/whatever at home because we don't have breakfast/lunch at home" - how would you treat a guest? Say your teenage niece staying with you for a month? Would you expect her to cover her own breakfast/lunch? 
d) If your child visited granny and grandpa and they didn't usually have have breakfast/lunch at home, would you still think they should provide at least a basic breakfast (come on, are we really discussing granola and milk here now?)? Would you give your child $20 to give to granny to cover cereal?

If she went to IHOP every morning and presented you with the bills, I'd agree with totally over the top and entitled and taking advantage of you. From what you are saying she is having breakfast and lunch as she used to... not entitled. I assume your kids are also provided with breakfast and lunch on snowdays, sick days, during summer vacation etc. I hope other guests are provided with breakfast when visiting (if not - odd family dynamics but you do you). This is a question of general hospitality and treating a guest well.

Really? I think if you aren't open to continue the way you did during the year that should have been made very, very clear before agreeing to let her stay (she might have made other plans). Changing rules now that there is nothing she can do about it (her plans are fixed, she has a plane ticket home, she cannot just up and leave now)? Do you want to taint a whole year by this now that it's over? Something to foul up your relationship over? Breakfast and lunch?!

And no, an AP cannot work for their HF in their travel month. Your ex AP visiting for the summer cannot legally watch your kids for you (she can spend time with them, yes but she cannot babysit them - see the problem?). I don't think a friend visiting from abroad could officially watch your children. I am not even sure your non-US mother/sister/cousin could legally babysit your children when visiting (being a relative may be different and I am not a lawyer). As soon as they "take a job" (not necessarily paid, free room and board, which you usually provide a guest who is staying with you is enough to be considered payment) they need a visa. Which you can't get for babysitting. I have heard from APs being detained (or send into secondary) at the boarder because they said they were visiting their former HF. First time I visited my ex HF and said so at the boarder I was subject to at least a dozen questions about my HF currently having an AP (they did), me planning to watch the children (I didn't) etc. and what saved me most was probably that I was traveling with my boyfriend. If nothing happens and nobody notices? Nobody will care. Kids have an accident while in exAP's care? See where that gets you. Or her. Most likely her.

[quote=Anonymous]I am all for playing by the rules. But this seems odd to me. I had a friend visiting from another country and she babysat. I did not pay her, but she offered and we took her up on it. Are you telling me I did something illegal? [/quote]

Legally? I'd say yes.
You didn't pay her but offering room and board is already considered compensating her for babysitting. Childcare (work) provided by a non-resident alien who did not enter the US on a visa that allows them to work? Illegal. Even if they chose to help out, even if they offer and beg. Legally they cannot work. Working while not on the correct visa? Detainment, deportation, entry ban. And again, as long as nobody notices what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. No plaintiff, no judge.[/quote]

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