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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We give raises and bonuses throughout the year but we don't advertise that when matching.  Many APs don't realize additional benefits that families may offer, but some are very savvy.  [b]There are networks of APs  (Brazil has a big group, for example) that will compare benefits and experiences, and pass on info to prospective APs so they come into the interview hoping for more. [/b] My APs haven't really known any other APs prior to the program so they just expect what the agency promises them, then when we give raises and bonuses they are pretty appreciative.[/quote]

I've interviewed Brazilians during matching, but get turned off when they start mentioning stuff from these comparisons. I refuse to match with someone with a blatant attitude of "what will you give me." There have been stories in our area about APs that coach the toddler to tell the parents that AP "needs" an Apple Watch for Christmas or the latest iPhone. Nope... next![/quote]

While going through a recent rematch, I joined a few closed Facebook groups, and it was an education to me about how there to appear to be certain networks that traffic in these kinds of comparisons.  On one hand, I think it's good for an APs to think they know what they want.  On the other, I still think it's true (as is often stated on this board), the best situations are ones that are welcoming, respectful, with good communication and mutual appreciation.  Which are not things that can be measured in private suites, luxury vacations, and gym memberships, which is why I think comparing benefits is ultimately counter-productive.

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Here is the language we use in one of our early get-to-know you emails.  Based on the response we get to this, we either decline the match and look elsewhere or feel comfortable moving ahead.  There is no chance I am bringing someone into our household who is in this for what they can get.

I hope you googled [our town].  You'll see that it is listed as one of the most highly educated towns in the US.  We think it is a great environment and a lovely place to live.  As you will also see from reading,  __ is a "fancy" and very expensive town of what can be really huge homes, but you should know that ours isn't one of them.  We live in a fairly small home by American standards. We live near the college so are in the neighborhood where many of the professors live, and this is a much less fancy area.  Our house is small, but we think it is pretty.  We keep it neat and organized (I have been told I run "a German household" by some au pairs haha), but it is not big.  The au pair's room is on the same floor as all the other bedrooms, and the bathroom is shared with __ (who is remarkably neat for a boy but still a boy).  If a large house, fancy car, and nice vacations are important to you, then there are plenty of families in __ who offer that, but we aren't one of them.  Our APs drive a __, and we do not take many vacations that don't entail visiting family.  So this is also something to think about.  The other au pairs in __ tend to live in bigger, fancier houses and drive bigger, fancier cars than our Aps do, and any AP who comes to us needs to understand this and be OK with it.  Please think about this and let me know if you have any questions or concerns about this.  We will totally understand if you're looking for something else for your year in the US.[/quote]

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