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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]MB here.  I think you're conflating some issues here OP, which is understandable but short-sighted.

You have a nanny you like and trust, whom you want to retain. You offer a decent compensation package, especially when the additional vacation time and regular early departures are factored in.  Her workload is steadily increasing in terms of complexity - so the skills she needs now (3 kids at various ages and differing schedules) are changing.  If she can keep up with all of that (and wants to) then that further increases her value.

Going through nanny transitions with my kids has taught me to seriously weigh the value of continuity, family knowledge, stability for the kids, trust/reliability and my stress level very highly.  All of those easily translate to an extra $50-75 per week.

So my advice is to be generous with your nanny and give at least a $1/hr increase.  Also talk with her about other ways you can show your appreciation.  Perhaps formalize that one shorter day a week, or add some health insurance benefit (that can be a real cash value without the added costs of taxes), give her a few more guaranteed vacation days (all of xmas week in addition to the two weeks for instance) etc...  And ask her what would mean the most to her (in addition to some sort of raise.)

Then deal w/ your husband's concerns separately.  Frame that in terms of "happy wife/happy life", stress free household is worth its weight in gold, the cost of finding/hiring/training a new nanny certainly being more than a few hundred dollars, etc...  Don't make your nanny pay the price for what you have to negotiate w/ your husband.

If you have money, use it.  Throw money at the situation to make your nanny happy and make all of your lives easier.  It's money well spent and nickel and diming will hurt you in the long run.

If you had an unexpected car expense of 2k you would pay it, right?  So put this total expense into that kind of perspective.

Good luck![/quote]

Thanks for the thoughtful feedback. I certainly agree with regard to the value of consistency, her ability to manage, and my stress levels. DH is also thinking about this as a zero sum thing, like the tradeoff is between $0 and $60k, which it's not because I'm not going to quit my job.[b] It's really the marginal cost of whatever her raise is, over a couple of years until the kids are in school[/b]. Also, with three kids, she's on par with FT daycare costs. I may make that point to him, in addition to the happy wife/happy life one. [/quote]

Exactly (re the bolded.)  [/quote]

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