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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I get OP as well.  She isn't saying she doesn't care about the nanny.  When her nanny calls to say she is sick, she switches into emergency mode with a list of 20 urgent things she needs to do NOW (calling all back up care options, calling her office, looking at her work load to see if she or DH can best take the day off, etc.).  When a nanny comes in the morning and hears MB or DB complain, the nanny is "on the clock," not needing to immediately jump on a list urgent things to take care of.  Staying late to tell MB and DB about the day cloud be similar, though, if the nanny is staying late to talk to the family and this is cutting into her own personal time.[/quote]

Nannies aren't on the clock to listen to you bitch and moan about your rich person problems, but we all do. Staying late is not our job, but most of us end up doing it because parents rarely respect the time this process takes and think those daily 10 minutes don't matter. If you can't manage to squeak out some compassion for your nanny when she calls in sick, you have a real empathy problem. No one is saying talk for 20 minutes, but don't act like she's done something wrong, which its so clear every time each of you post that you do actually think she's wronged you. On this thread alone we've seen "she calls an hour before she's supposed to arrive" "truly sick people don't apologize" "stop trying to make me say its okay when it isn't". THIS attitude is why you get a nanny begging for your approval eating up your precious time. Don't treat her like shit and she won't feel like it. Its really not hard. Neither is arranging backup care if you have an actual thought out plan, not just a list of possibilities. [/quote]

Not the OP, but What is "an actual thought out plan" for back-up care, and not just a list of possibilities?

Lets say you have three kids ages 6 mos, 2, and 5.  Your husband is already in the middle of surgery, and you are supposed to teach a class in an hour.  Give me some examples where you wouldn't feel anything but sorry for your nanny and her cold.

[/quote]

Okay, for your situation first thing I'd say is you need to give yourself more time when it comes to these things. I can't imagine why you'd set yourself up to have your nanny call, not an hour before you need to leave but an hour before you start teaching? Clearly her start time should be earlier, and you should set a deadline for calling out. I start work at 8:30 and my contract says I must call by 6:30, but preferably give them a heads up the evening before. The only reason they'd have an hour to work with is because I came down violently ill as I was headed out the door, and well there's just nothing you can do about that.

Next, say you've fixed that issue and you now have 2 hours to work with, not 1. First step in my plan would be family that can cover me for the day or at least for the morning. This doesn't mean calling around frantically asking everyone, it means you have members in your family that are close, and free typically, and know they are your backup. At the same time, I'd send off a text to my backup sitters. Sitters that know the kids, and have said they would like to be your backup. You should have at least one sitter preferably 2 like this in your rotation. Next would be a backup care service through an agency or daycare. Many home daycares have drop-in slots. Contact some and get to know the providers.

I'm sure you will discount all of my suggestions, but the difference between a list of possibilities, and an actual plan, is that you aren't just cold calling people hoping for the best. You should have a roster of people who are often available, know your kids, and can get to you quickly or you can get the kids to them. It takes some planning ahead of time, but if you have a list of 6 options, all of whom know they are in your roster, someone will be able to step in. Ideally, if you aren't a shit about her calling out, your nanny will let you know the night before if she's feeling sick.[/quote]

I am not discounting your suggestions.  They are good.  I don't actually have any family in the area, but that is a good suggestion.  We do have several sitters, and that was one of the first things we did when we moved here.  This is actually my list of people I am frantically calling.  And it is cold calling more or less.  Yes, they know my kids, but they aren't expecting a 7am call from me.

I am actually very sorry that I posted the first time.  I really can and do regularly solve this problem.  But it is always a little stressful.  [/quote]

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