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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There's no way that I would convince my husband, or that I could even convince myself, that paying our nanny to be at home without the kids for 30 hrs/wk makes sense if she's not doing 25 hrs/wk of housework (lunch break factored in). It just does not make sense at all. There's aftercare. There are annual memberships to companies that send temp nannies to your home if something falls through last minute. There's winter break, spring break, and summer break camps with after care. There are backup care centers. And for the handful of days per year when none of that works for you, there's also your own sick leave - DH & I have yet to find a day when it was a disaster for both of us to miss work and shuffle around some appointments when our backup care wasn't available.

All of those options are tens of thousands of dollars cheaper per year than having a nanny. If you're paying that much more, you expect to get that much more. OP, you do not owe it to them to do their housework if you feel it's beneath you, but they will expect something to be done with those 30 hrs or they will figure something else out. Do you have a degree? Maybe you could do some curriculum development for a supplemental education at home program for the kids - that would use up some hours in the week. Good luck to you![/quote]

In OP's case the twins are in half-day kindergarten -- where are you getting 30 hours a week?

[b]I never wanted my kids warehoused in aftercare or subjected to a temp nanny they never met before (especially when they are sick!).  For us, with children 10 and 7, having a full time nanny to take the kids to after school activities/lessons and having a loving nanny care for them when they are sick (nanny has been with us for ten years) is worth it's weight in gold.  Plus our nanny has substituted five hours a week during the week to give us a night out. [/b] [/quote]

Take note: this is a good mother and a good employer.  Her children have the stability of a longterm nanny and the employer has the coverage she needs.  [/quote]

Oh please.  Some families can afford that level of ongoing care and some can't.  That neither means that their children are being "warehoused" or that anyone is an inferior mother.

The sanctimony and judgment help no one.[/quote]

I disagree with you.  I also think that PP is a good mother and a good employer to put the best interest of her children ahead of everything.  We sacrifice to have a nanny for our child and will continue to sacrifice.  Children in aftercare situation ARE warehoused and the idea of some stranger coming to stay with them when they are sick is appalling.  [/quote]
What should be ahead of everything is the best interest of the family, not the children alone. Sometimes keeping the nanny will meet that standard, sometimes it won't. It's not a god to be worshiped.

I ask, again, what do you do to your children that they are sick so much that you can't take your own sick leave? Looking back at last year, I took maybe 4 days of sick leave to stay home with mine when they weren't well. [/quote]

NP here and my kids got sick CONSTANTLY the first two years they were in school.  Be glad yours didn't.

We've also kept our nanny even though both are in elementary school.  The sick days and countless school holidays aside, we need her more now than ever to shuttle to piano lessons, ballet and sports practices.  She is also a wonderful tutor.  Sometimes I feel like we need her more now than when they were younger.  Granted, we have a terrific nanny but I do think the sacrifice to NOT have my kids stuck in aftercare is worth every penny.

If you are okay with aftercare, that's fine.  I'd rather my kids be learning something and enjoying themselves than being stuck at school.  [/quote]

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