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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] a nanny is just a caregiver. They aren't there for the important stuff.  [/quote]

This right here tells me everything I need to know about you.  In your mind "The important stuff" is the kids' birthday party, or the time you took them to the aquarium on a Saturday.  But the reality is that for a young child "the important stuff" isn't the big milestones, it is the hundreds of daily acts of love and service that surround them with a feeling of being known and valued.  Some of that comes from mom and dad, and if nanny works relatively short hours, maybe even MOST of it comes from mom and dad.  But if you are gone 50+ hours each week, then your nanny plays a HUGE role in building the world your child inhabits.  And as kids get older having the same nanny means that their world is consistent through the changes of childhood and it means that "the person picking them up from school" (as you so dismissively refer to the job of caring for older children), is someone who knows them deeply and individually and is better able to help them navigate each new age and the challenges it brings.

Many parents feel that the only way for them to be "the parent" is for them to be the only one in the child's life who is consistent.  But the best parents are humble enough to admit when their life circumstances may prevent them from being around often enough to provide all the consistency and love and aupport their kids deserve.  These amazing parents are willing to let someone else in to help create a secure and loving home for their kids, even when the parents aren't in it.  In return, great nannies invest time and energy in supporting the parent-child bond and smoothing the fabric of their daily routine so that life is easier and better for the entire family.  And THAT is the most important stuff of all.

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Well said, PP.  Happily good mothers know this is true and value it.  The poor mothers are threatened by it (and that is most of the vocal mothers on this board)  I feel sorry for them.  [/quote]

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