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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm just completely baffled by how ready to judge everyone is. When a member of your family dies and you want to pay your respects, do you want people telling you that grieving for three days is okay, but four is excessive? There is a very finite number of family people have, and an infinite number of working days. In ten years it will matter that she was there for her husband in such a terrible time, not that she went to work that one extra day. Have a heart, maybe?

Now if you think that you can judge how people should deal with a death in the family (and who is anyone to judge how affected people should be by death in their family?!), by all means tell her that you think taking four days to go out of town for a funeral is too much and you don't trust her anymore. But that's heartless and inhuman.

And you should always have back up care, so this one is on you. [/quote]

This!!

My grandmother is like a second Mom.  She lived with us my entire life and helped raise me.  We are still very close, and I'd be devastated if she passed away.  Not everyone considers a grandparent as "extended" family, someone they only see on holidays.   I know  my husband would want to be there to support me, especially knowing how much he loves her too.  And, I would be there for him if someone close to him died.

The 3 day bereavement pay is standard in the corporate world, but most good employers are flexible.  When my Dad died, I was out for a week.  When I returned, my boss insisted I take more time.   It meant so much to me.

Please try to have some compassion.  And, definitely get back up.  Life happens to all of us.

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