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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=nannydebsays]I think as long as your nanny is taking your kids to places like the zoo, playgrounds, splash parks, and so on, it might be a little much to have her report first who she and the kids may meet there, especially if they are meeting adults who also care for kids for what is, basically, a play date.

And since your kids will tell you what happened anyway, it's not like it's a secret.

OTOH, if the nanny is new to your family, and isn't offering up ANY info on daily activities, it's not unreasonable to ask her to keep a calendar with the kids schedules and let you know if she is going anywhere "out of the ordinary" and needs funds.

Now, if your kids were reporting that while at the park nanny met a man/woman and kissed them for a long time after telling your kids to go play...that might be worth some concern.[/quote]

I would say if it's a pre-arranged playdate then why not mention it if we discuss planned activities? The fact that the kids mention it is irrelevant, the nanny chose to hide it. Also, it's a playdate if kids are similar in age. If mine is 2 and the other ones are infants or 5 year olds then it's not really a playdate in my opinion and I might want to weigh in before the activity takes place.[/quote]

This really hits the nail on the head. Unless the nanny and parents have established a relationship where there is really no mention of anything that the nanny and kids do during the day either before or after, (which I think IRL is very rare), why NOT mention it before or even after the fact?  OP's nanny is not meeting up with her charges' friends' nannies- she's meeting up with her own friends and relatives.  OP's kids are at an age where they will have their own friends and preferences, so it's hard to cast that as something she is really doing in the kids' best interest (and is different from having say a 2 year-old charge, noticing the charge plays well with another 2 year old at the park, and then making plans with that nanny to meet up again).  At the very least OP should have the opportunity to ask questions, particularly since her nanny has essentially just given herself a perk!  The nanny may claim the kids are similarly aged but if the nanny's charge is 5 and her sister's kids are under 2, that's not a play date.  Not mentioning it at all denies your MB the chance to ask those questions and weigh in (and again, most MBs on this thread have said they wouldn't object, they'd just want to know), and honestly seems like the nanny is trying to hide something.

I find threads like this really interesting when a number of nannies respond that they do something regularly and don't tell their MBs because their MBs don't care, but the MB responses suggest they would care if they knew or that they do care, but are trying to pick their battles ...[/quote]

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