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[quote=Anonymous]OP, we had an AP who constantly made similar comments, and we finally just decided to take the attitude of "committing" to ignoring it as best we could, as one of the responders suggested.  This AP was a really good caregiver for our children, and they loved her, but we (me and DH) just didn't like her.  And part of it was this attitude.  Now, I hate to stereotype by nationality, but I'm going to do it anyway:  the propensity to speak this way seems more common to this particular AP's region than to the usual American etiquette.  (Speaking of our AP, not yours, since you did not mention what country she was from.)  And obviously I am making a huge generalization, but it is something cultural that we have noticed.  (And we know it's a generalization, since we met some of this AP's family members who were not like this at all.)

We would joke that if we said to our AP, "the sky is blue," she'd say: "ah, but it is not as beautiful a blue as in my country," or "oh, I have seen much better shades of blue.  This blue is really a bad kind of blue."  And that was the key to getting through it - we tried to make light of it to ourselves, and ignore it as best we could.  We really did start to notice it less.  Of course, this was all helped by her being a really great AP to our children - we let the personality issues slide as best we could, though we are really hoping to have a better fit next time, since we had such a great AP (both in terms of childcare and personality fit) prior to this particular one, that we know it is possible!

I mean, this AP literally complained about EVERYTHING - general life-related, childcare-related, etc.  But - if we actually pushed back on something (e.g. a complaint that was also a request that we accommodate her in some way that we weren't able or willing to do), she usually let it go.  Or if, for fun, we actually asked a follow up question - it was usually pretty clear that she was just complaining as a way of talking, and not because she really cared.  (e.g. AP: "It is so stupid how they check my ID every time I walk into my favorite bar." Us: "Well, maybe, but we do have a law here that says you have to be 21 in order to drink.  How else would they enforce that?"  AP:  "I don't know, but it is just stupid."  Us: "Okay.")[/quote]

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