Reply to Second child, "stealing" nanny from nanny share?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I like the idea of both families and the nanny meeting together. You would not want the nanny to feel the families went behind her back.[/quote]

They are her employers, not her partners. They should discuss their needs and options privately before involving the nanny. I doubt their nanny would want to sit through their awkward "negotiations" (for lack of a better word) anyway. [/quote]

The nanny is NOT your race horse that you negotiate.

How DARE you and your elitist self.
[/quote]

I'm sorry? What are you talking about?

Two sets of parents employ a nanny. When the situation for one of the sets of parents changes, they should discuss with the other family what they all [b]ideally[/b] want to do - make it a 3-child share? invite the nanny to work FT for the family with 2 children? invite the nanny to stay on with the other family and have a new family join the share? Once both sets of parents have decided what would best suit them - what their needs are - they can sit down together with the nanny and let her know about the new addition. They can then ask her if she would be interested in XYZ offers that they have discussed.

If the two sets of parents are unable to reach an agreement, then they should let the nanny know that they will be dissolving the share. They can each then make whatever offer they want to the nanny and she can make her decision.

Please, try TRY to understand what you're reading before you jump off the deep end.[/quote]
I've done several shares. Each families negotiates with me directly. I would not tolerate your nonsense, pp. You'd be out of the share if you tried to go behind by back like that.

[/quote]

You're just... clearly not understanding what I am saying.

1) Of course the details of a job will be negotiated directly with the nanny.

2) The details of the parents' partnership, how they want to proceed with joint or individual childcare, should be decided independently of her.

3) Then any offers or discussions about possible changes would take place with the nanny.

For example, in my opinion, it would go something like this:

Parents A and Parents B sit down.
Parents A say, "we are having DC#2 in September and wanted to talk with you about our nanny share"
Parents A and Parents B discuss their thoughts on having a 3-child share ("yes, we would be comfortable with paying more per hour and having you pay less per hour" or "I'd be concerned that Jimmy and Johnny won't have enough of the nanny's attention if there is a baby there" and so on)
Parents B say "actually, we were thinking about an academic preschool, perhaps you'd like to hire the nanny FT for just your family?"
Parents A say "oh, that sounds great but I wonder if we can afford that..."
Parents B say they think it sounds like the best thing to do would be to keep the share functioning until December and then dissolve it.
Parents A agree.
Then they can both sit down with the nanny and give her the news of the baby, notice of the end date for the share, and Parents A can privately make her an offer to stay on as their FT nanny. The nanny can then negotiate with Family A directly for her terms.

Why on earth would the nanny need to be present before that final step? THOSE CONVERSATIONS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH HER.[/quote]

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