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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This feels like a post trying to stir up drama, but I'll answer you anyway. Since my child will be going to daycare two days a week I'd hardly consider that spending "more waking hours with my charges" my fil will take the baby half a day a week and she'll come to work with me my two short hour days. Lots of parents work full time while their kids are in daycare, the fact that I work and spend time with other children doesn't bother me.[/quote]

OP here- I think the forum is too riddled with bitterness if you read my post and immediately thought I was trying to start drama. Far from it.

Anyways your situation is unique because your child comes to work with you two days out of the week (which as you said is a short day to begin with), and a half day that is definitely not what I am referring to.

My situation- my child is an infant, I don't think she should be in daycare now because I have heard countless stories of infants just being left to lay on their backs all day. My cousin takes care of her. I used to think the same thing, "well lots of moms work and have a nanny", for example. But recently since she has been sleeping through the night, by the time I get home 7:30-8:00, she is only a wake for an hour maybe two, then off to bed. Then I leave before she wakes and my spouse takes her to our family's home. So yes I spend more waking hours with my charges than my child, and I feel really guilty.

(If she spends 50 hrs a week asleep, and I spend 60 hrs/week at work or in commute, that effectively leaves 10 hours in each work week that I can spend with her, +/- 1 hour)[/quote]
A few things.  First, as you undoubtedly know, this is pretty much the reality of any working mother.  Whether you nanny, try cases, treat patients, assemble cars, if you work, you are away from your child.  Second, I actually agree with you that infants do better with individual care. I didn't want to place my son in daycare and couldn't afford a nanny of our own, so we found a good nanny share, and I felt comfortable that my son is getting individual attention and affection.  We paid $9/hr.  Perhaps you can look into something like this?  Third, I know it seems like your child's schedule is totally at odds with yours so you barely see her, but rest assured that she will not sleep like this forever, nor will you always come home at 8 pm.  My son is now 2 and a half.  I spend about an hour in the morning getting him ready for the day, and then enjoy my evenings with him from 6 to 9 pm.  This describes the reality of most working moms.  [/quote]

OP here- Thanks for your thoughtful response. I must agree it will not last forever, and the best choice may be to stick it out. Financially it is what's best for my family, and I'll just have to try my hardest to make those hours count. I think I will also give up on date night/weekends so I have more time with her.[/quote]

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