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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Defining:

Mb would tell me DAILY when to change diapers, feed, put down to nap, go on a walk, etc. I already knew the schedule.  It was the same daily. I had to log every single thing and she remind me to log every single day. I nicely tried to remind her I FUCKING KNEW WHAT TO DO but she didn't listen. She would be 5 feet away when I was on my break eating lunch (nap time). She would tell me when I should grab a book, go take them on the porch, etc. 99% of the time for 6 months. I ran away so fucking fast & IM HAPPY! I miss the babies but never again.[/quote]

I do not micromanage like in the above example, I agree that is too much.  And I did not micromanage my last part time nanny.  But yes, I find myself micromanaging my current pt nanny because she does not seem to know what to do as I thought she would.  I hate micromanaging, and would prefer to take a step back.  But I am trying to make things work with this nanny, and she just doesn't seem to know what to do a lot of the time and does things very differently.  She is pt, not full time, so I am the primary caretaker.

So in some situations it does sound like some MBs are just overbearing, but maybe some of the nannies being micromanaged (especially those with less years of experience) are being micromanaged for a reason.  [/quote]

THIS!  I agree that some moms are overbearing.  If I had to tell a nanny when to change a diaper I'd be looking for a new nanny.

But soooo many nannies think they know best just because they do this for a living.  The truth is, very few of them have any real training in early childhood development, and most (certainly not all, but most) don't know how to encourage a child's development in the various core areas.  They take their charges our for playdates and watch them play with toys and think that makes them great at what they do.

Nannies, you need to understand that most working mothers in DC (and I'm sure many other cities) are highly educated and highly motivated to excel in every area of their lives.  Many of us babysat or worked at camps, etc. when we were younger.  Many of us know as much or more about childcare as the average nanny.  If we don't, we teach ourselves by reading and consulting with others, using the same drive that helped us figure out how to navigate college, grad school and the professional world with success.  The notion on this board that moms are clueless and that nannies know what is best for our kids is absurd.

Most moms who lay out a schedule for their nannies are trying to ensure that the nanny is using her time with the child effectively, encouraging a full range of skills development and experiences.  No manager wants to micromanage; it takes too much time away from other things the manager needs to do.  They do it because we have not yet become convinced that the managee is ready to perform in manner expected without constant guidance.  In fact, by definition, GOOD management is the ability to vary one's management style based on the skills and readiness of the managee.  [b]Typically, the mom will happily stop micromanaging [/b]as soon as has some reassurance that the nanny is performing as expected.

[/quote]

No serious nanny would categorize what you're describing as micromanaging, particularly if you take the time to train your (young? inexperienced?) nanny and are explicit in saying that the guidelines you've created are to ensure a range of developmental activities but are not set in stone if she has her own thoughts/ideas to bring to the table. Keeping that dialogue open, sharing thoughts and games and experiences, and being clear about what you want from your nanny are all great ways to outgrow the need for management too.

However, as nannies, I think we are in a better position to say what "typically" happens, and I can assure you that micromanaging MBs do not typically stop no matter what the nanny does/provides/shares. Managing your nanny (which is what you have described) and micromanaging your nanny are two VERY different things.[/quote]

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