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[quote=Anonymous]
First, know that it's important to acknowledge your feelings without judging yourself too harshly. You're not alone in developing unexpected emotions. However, it’s crucial to set boundaries for both yourself and hers. The situation is delicate, and maintaining a professional and respectful relationship with your au pair is key.

Take a step back and focus on your role as a father and a host. She’s in a vulnerable position, relying on you for her experience in the U.S., and it’s important not to complicate that. Consider talking to a trusted therapist to work through your feelings in a private, safe space. You’re doing the right thing by seeking help, but the goal is to get back to being the caring father and employer you’ve always been without putting undue emotional pressure on her.

It’s clear that your au pair views you in a supportive, father-like role, especially by asking you to meet her boyfriend. It's important to accept that her feelings toward you are not romantic, and it’s crucial to avoid any illusions that they might be.

Start by creating some healthy emotional distance while maintaining a professional and respectful relationship with her. You can still be supportive without deepening the personal connection. Focus on your role as a father and employer, and rely on your own support system—whether friends, family, or therapy—to help you process these feelings and regain stability.[/quote]

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