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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don't have food in the house you're not okay with her giving the kids. Stop buying canned soup and mac and cheese.

Tell her "Your performance seems to be slipping, I want you to go out strong this summer so I can give you a great reference and good severance. Can you go back to the days of taking the kids out daily, reading with them for at least an hour to an hour and a half, and getting laundry done during nap time?" [/quote]

OP again. Thanks for this suggestion. I have been trying to address issues like the food or phone or books one at a time so it’s not an overwhelming amount of feedback for her to have to fix at once, but maybe it’s better to just get it all out so she knows it’s an across the board issue of not being proactive.

To clarify on food: she is the one buying the mac & cheese and soup. We told her she could buy groceries or use our groceries/leftovers for kid meals. She almost never uses our food and buys everything for kid meals herself. This was great when she was baking yams and steaming carrots, not so good now that it’s lots of processed preservative-heavy stuff.

I don’t mind things like mac & cheese in moderation, but it would be the ONLY thing for a meal and she would make it many days in a row. When I sat down to talk with her about the food issue, DC2 had been eating nothing but mac & cheese for lunch for 2 weeks straight. It’s a bit better now that she adds hummus & fruit to each meal and has a few more frozen/canned entrees on rotation, but it’s hard not to notice the difference vs. a few years ago.[/quote]

I'd tell her everything at once. She's done it before so you know she's capable. And I'd tell her she no longer buys the groceries - you'll do that and she can make the kids meals from what you have. I'm kind of surprised you let the mac & cheese thing go on so long. I'd have said something after the second day in a row! [/quote]

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