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[quote=Anonymous]Nanny of 10 years hat:

My general thought:
There are two kinds of parents.  The kind who think that they could easily do what I do all day if they chose to stay home with their kids and the kind who realize that caring for children is an involved skillset that I have spent years studying and practicing and that there are things I do that they could not without lots more study and care.

The good: my best employers are the ones who value my relationship with them and with their kids and are willing to invest some time and energy into working through issues as they arise.  Yes, I know that by definition all nanny parents are busy!  But if you have a great nanny, make time to communicate regularly.  For families who don’t have a habit of communicating, that tells me that if there’s an issue, there’s no point in bringing it up, because really no issue can be resolved with one conversation.  If we only have a real talk twice a year then if something comes up I am more likely to start a job search than to try to set up a meeting.

The bad: I have never worked for parents who mistreated me (and I know I am lucky), but I have been yelled at and criticized by grandparents.  If you OR your spouse wouldn’t want to spend all day with your parents, don’t make me do it.  Some grandparents are great, but most families know when they have difficult grandparents yet they don’t choose to manage those grandparents themselves!

One more thing: in a long-term nanny position, I really do love your kids as much as you do.  And they love me.  But I can never, ever replace you in their hearts, so don’t sweat it if you kid’s bond with the nanny seems too close.  They ALWAYS know who their family really is.

Weekend babysitter hat:

General thought: a really great babysitter can be as busy as she wants.  Right now I literally do not have a Friday or Saturday night empty for the next TWO MONTHS.  You might think you hold all the cards because you are paying me, but from what my clients tell me, it is hard to find a good sitter who can manage the kids’ routine, handle anything as it comes up, leave the house in decent shape and who won’t flake out or flame out.  If you have a sitter you love, treat her well or she’ll replace you.

The good: 
The best babysitting clients remember that you haven’t been to their house in at least a week (and that you may have other clients).  Just because I have been sitting for you for 2 years, doesn’t mean ai know everything.  Plan 5 minutes to give me the run down.  I can’t tell you how many times parents had a big change (such as switching kids to a new room, dropping the pacifier, potty training) since my last time with them and then forget to tell me because it feels like old news by the time they see me again.  Make it easier on me, you and your kids by communicating up front.

The bad: if I am working after 10 pm, then I might dose off on the couch.  If that doesn’t work for you, either pay me way more money (an extra $5-10 per hour) or plan to find someone else.

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