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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am in a somewhat similar situation. I have a main family I watch all year long and then I do a share  with two additional families 1/wk. my main nf knows about it and doesn’t care. Occasionally family b or c will ask for hours outside of the weekly arrangement. They do this with the understanding that my main family is the priority- if main charges are sick, snow day, off school, they are the ones I go with because they provide a stable income. My main nf has right of first refusal just like I have right of first refusal with gigs with them. The other two families don’t need me throughout the whole year or even the same number of hours per week.  If I am unavailable, family C will call other sitters. For example, the share is from 9-1 on Thursdays. I stay until 3:30 for family C. If family C has an afternoon game/event another sitter comes to relieve me. Family C asks for extra hours (outside of Thursdays) maybe one or twice a week. About 50% of the time, I have to say no. They are free to go with another sitter for any and all hours. I’m sure it is a bit of a pain for them, but they knows about my main job when recruiting me and just generally that is the nature of extremely sporadic childcare needs[/quote]

Our nanny is the same.  She's been with us for over four years and while she has sometimes taken jobs when our kids are in school, she always makes it clear to the other families that if our kids are sick or there's a snow day or something comes up, she will need to be there for us.  We pay her for this privilege, but not her normal hourly rate for all of those hours.  It doesn't bother me if she can make some extra money on the side as long as I never have to find back-up care.  The other families seem fine with it as well.  You don't, OP, which is totally fine (honestly, I wouldn't want to be one of the other families either), but just like my nanny isn't willing to risk her job with us, it sounds like yours isn't either, and that's ok.  Frustrating for you, yes, but this is very common.[/quote]

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