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[quote=Anonymous]The nanny thing is absolutely a leap of faith (nanny here, but I have also hired backup nannies for my families so I've been on both sides), but you have to give some trust at some point.  That said, here's what all parents should do beforehand:

1) talk to each reference in depth.  Ask questions that demand a detailed response (instead of "what are her faults" ask "what was the most challenging situation you've had with Nanny and how did you work through it?"). If she is light on professional references, ask for personal ones.  And in all of her references, listen with your emotions too.  For a great nanny, her references will be tripping over themselves to tell you how much they love her.  They will feel that they can never repay her for the loving care she gave their children and will be so happy to talk as long as you want because they are glad to help their beloved nanny.

2) Run a thorough background check through a reputable company, google her and follow her on as many forms of social media as you can find.

3) Ask her detail-oriented questions.  Nannying is not a well-paying or prestigious field.  There aren't a whole lot of people who are smart/educated enough to know all the right answers but evil enough to abuse a child.  Most bad things happen out of ignorance.  They don't know a lot about discipline so they get frustrated and yell or spank, or they don't know the rules around safe sleep so a baby dies of SIDS, or they don't know first aid/cpr as well as they should and a toddler chokes to death because they can't help.  Think through questions that demand explicit answers.

4) Trust your instincts, and if you don't, have a trusted friend or family member meet her as well.  I know some moms who are so emotional about the whole thing that they just can't feel that trust in their own judgement, so they have someone else close to them come in to meet the nanny just to evaluate for red flags.

Once nanny starts, you can ask her to keep track of the places they frequent or enroll her in a class and go to those same places yourself on weekends.  Over time, people will recognize you and tell you about your nanny.  You can also swing by the house early now and then or ask neighbors to keep and eye out, but at some point that kind of things becomes an obsession with catching her in the wrong that robs you of trust instead of building it. You have to find a balance.[/quote]

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